Funny Mom Jokes Dirty

Hindi type ni Bernard ang mga babaeng masyadong bata sa kanya. Dahil ang pakiramdam niya ay magiging baby sitter lang siya ng mga ito kapag inaatake ng tantrums. Ngunit may isang babaeng gumulo sa kanya, si Marie, secretary ng dati niyang nililigawan na naging asawa ng kaibigan niya. Naiinis siya dito dahil mapang asar ito, hanggang isang gabi, bigla na lang niyang narealize na pwede pala niya itong magustuhan. At kabaliktaran ng pagkakakilala niya sa babaeng mas bata ang ugali nito, matured at maunawain ang dalaga. Kahit siya ang may kasalanan ay nagsosorry ito. Bigpang dumating ang kangyang first love, si Eleanor o mas kulala sa tawag na Ellue, akala niya, masisira ang telasyon nila dahil dito, ngunit si Marie ay siya lang ang pinapaniwalaan. Kaya naging maayos pa rin ang takbo ng relasyon nila, until makilala niya si Domeng, kahit noon lang niya nakilala ang kaibigan nito, sinakmal siya ng matinding selos, lalo pa at may mga ipinakitang pruweba sa kanya si Ellie na niloloko siya ni Marie. Lalo siyang nagalit sa babae. Ng matauhan siya sa mga nangyari, at nalaman niya ang totoo, parang huli na ang lahat. Kulang na lang isumpa siya ni Marie sa sobrang galit. Ayaw na siyang balikan ng babae. May pag asa pa kaya na mahalin siya ulit ng dalaga? Paano niya mapapatunayan ang pagmamahal dito kung pati mga kaibigan niya ayaw ng makialam sa kanila?

Shortly after Sophia and Elijah's marriage, Sophia suffers a miscarriage and the treatment of Sophia by Elijah and his family deteriorates. Sophia meets Elijah at his office and his ex-girlfriend Serena, with whom he has an intimate relationship. The neglect of her husband, the abuse of her husband’s mom, the provocation of her rival, and the marriage born out of children rather than love all make Sophia feel suffocated and repressed. She couldn't stand it anymore. She was going to divorce him. After the divorce, Sophia goes abroad to study art, and on the way, she discovers that she is pregnant. Daniel, the senior she is studying with, takes good care of her, but at that moment she discovers that Elijah has followed her abroad.

BOOK TWO OF THE MAFIA MEN SERIES. *** He taught her how to live. She taught him how to love. *** Everyone called him a monster even the people who were close to him. But I was the only one who saw the troubled man hiding demons from his past. They called him a killing machine; he took lives without a second thought. But he saved mine, he saved me. I had no idea my savior would come in the form of a scarred face, covered in tattoos, who can't—or choose not to—speak a word to me. But I decided to take a risk. I opened the cage where his demons lived and I set them free. And then... I handed my heart to the monster to do as he pleased. TRIGGER WARNING: This book is provocative. It is categorized as DARK ROMANCE for a reason. It will not be for everyone. If you are a reader with certain triggers or sensitivities common to the dark romance genre then know that this book contains: a very dirty talker hero, sexual degradation, dubcon, rough play, and s&m themes

Sext Buddy: [I’d do anything to fuck you right now.] Alicia: [I want you so bad too…really.] During the summer, Alicia has been sexting with a total stranger in hopes that she’d never meet him. At the beginning of college, her mum tells her that they have a guest. She meets the stranger she was constantly sexting. But then, what happens when the stranger is her cousin?

Mahal ni Camila si Brix kaya sobrang saya niya nang ikasal sila at magkaanak. Pero bago siya manganak, nalaman niyang kukunin ni Brix ang bata at ipapaalaga sa kababata nitong si Daisy dahil ayaw nitong si Camila ang makagisnang ina ng anak. Sa sakit at galit, naaksidente si Camila at humiling ng divorce. Makalipas ang tatlong taon, bumalik siya kasama ang anak nila, pero nalaman niyang hindi itinuloy ni Brix ang divorce. “Do you think you can run away from me, Camila? Think twice. Dahil kahit saang sulok ng mundo, mahahanap kita. You're my wife and forever you'll be,” ani Brix at unti-unting lumapit kay Camila na panay ang urong ngayon. “No! I don't want you to be my Daddy! Divorce my Mommy right now!” sigaw ng bata na nasa likod pala ng dalawa.

It's funny though to think her one night stand would lead to her joy, her very existence, her son! Being duped by her groom at the altar, is all it takes for Mikaella Sandoval to sacrifice her virginity to a complete stranger who swoops in at the right time leading to a son that binds them

Felicity McCarthy and orphan young girl who was raised by her aunt after the loss of her parents and was pampered and loved by her. But due to the shock she sustained in the accident, she was like a child even at twenty four years. Raymond Baldwin, a cold, rich, self centered aloof businessman who cares about nothing but his business and anything that will give him more money. Unfortunately, things got difficult when his grandparents refused to handover their multi billion dollar company to him unless he finds a bride. Raymond decided to rent a bride for a year in order to win them over. What will happen when a cute, childish bride marries a cold aloof groom?

WARNING: Viewer discretion is advised. Contains graphic sex scenes, adult language and situation intended for mature readers only. R-18 "Touch me. Devour me. Savor in me and enjoy every minute of pleasure, Wade," - Rosenda Dela Vega Lahat tayo ay may kanya-kanyang swerte sa buhay, nasa atin na lamang kung paano natin hahanapin ito. Lumaki si Rosenda sa bahay ampunan ngunit dumating ang swerte sa kanyang buhay nang ampunin siya ng isang mayamang negosyante at haciendero na si Joaquin Dela Vega. Rosenda has it all. Fame. Money. Beauty. Power. Perfect heir to the Dela Vega Empire. Ngunit ito ay may isang kontrobersyal na sikreto. In-love siya kay Wade Dela Vega na nakababatang kapatid ng kanyang amain na si Joaquin but Wade is a womanizer, a strict Professor of the University that she's into and a cold hearted person kung kaya't sinubukan niyang akitin ito at makipaglaro ng apoy rito but over all he wanted his love more than anything else and not only lust. Magtagumpay kaya si Rosenda na baguhin ang isang katulad ni Wade?

Anastasia Samuel, happy go lucky, bubbly woman with God gifted beauty who is currently in the need of a job. What could go wrong, right? Actually a lot can go wrong after she lost her memory in a tragic accident and is now living a new life for three years without any hint of the past. She is living a miserable life where her mind makes her forget every small event which she doesn't want to remember. Darius Henderson, the handsome and cold hearted devil who is also known as the CEO of the Henderson empire. What happens when Anastasia bumps into him and his blood boils in hatred after three long years and claims to be her husband about whom she doesn't remember anything! She needs a job. He will give her a job, as his personal assistant. And things will start to go down. He had broken her heart before and now he will break her soul but will he be able to cure her by giving his heart to her later? ____ "Anastasia! Where are you going?" Darius asked her in a worried tone while he was kneeling down by her with a worried look on his face. The hatred in his eyes was gone as if it was never there. "To work?" Anastasia asked in an amusing tone as if she was finding the question really funny. "Are you okay? You were just screaming in your unc-... sleep." He asked with a deep frown. Anastasia waved his words off with a small chuckle. "I was having a bad dream about you claiming me as your wife and.. kissed me. Haha, funny right?" She said and laughed out loud like it was the funniest joke ever while Darius looked at her with shock written all over his face.

When Evelyn found her husband had been cheating with her young sister on their honeymoon,She was heartbroken and ended up having the best ONS with a hot stranger. 6 years later, Evelyn becomes a single mom of genius twins. They are doing a live to find their dad on the famous Quiz Nation.Him to his beta: The boys are mine! Find her!