Funny Quotes Grandma Novels & Stories

“…sweetie, I’m exhausted. I will be a better maid of honor tomorrow if I sleep well tonight.” “Oh!” her grandma Helen says, the funniest little old lady who always seems to have more energy than I can muster. “We’re not sleeping right away out at Judy and Oscar’s. Nope! This is my first time in a limousine and I’m feeling lucky.” She elbows my side and gives me a not-so-subtle wink. “Not that kind of lucky.” She shakes her head. “The kind of lucky that will make me as rich as Kimberly Ann’s man. I’m so confident, I’ll spot you five dollars, and we’ll all play poker. Five-card stud. Texas Hold ‘em.” She pouts her lips. “I’d win more if we could get Duncan to stay with us. Silly traditions. It

Grandpa busted out laughing at my father’s question. Is this some kind of joke? I thought to myself. “Wait for it, Brian, 3,2,1” Grandpa said while laughing “Zee!” You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me!

We got lastly a white woman suit for grandma and flat shoes for her. We returned home after we got everything we wanted. Grandma was happy about the suit we got her. I can't be that you are now getting married. How time fly my dear. In my memory l still see the little Rynet who would still my pancakes whenever l brought them at home. Grandma said. Stop embrassing me grandma. I said. She did what!!!! Keron asked as he approached to where grandma and l sat on the sofa. She used to l covered her mouth with my palm to prevent her from talking. Keron laughed out loud. Oh my God l didnt no that you had such habits...... I told while laughing. Keron's stop it unless you will marry yourself you cont

With their old age I try to look out for them the best I can. “ Oh for goodness sakes we did not, no need to worry your little head about us. We might be old but we aren’t stupid.” this made Creed and Ryan laugh at me for getting scolded by my grandma “ Venessa, You have such a lovely home!” Ryan such a kiss ass

I only knew that grandpa pampered grandma very much, it could be described as crazy. I always felt that Grandma was an eccentric person. My grandpa was such a good person, he would never remarry someone else. I said these words to Grandpa, who had never been angry with me, but that day Grandpa slapped me. Grandpa said, "If you dare to talk to grandma like that again in the future, I will beat you to death. Your grandma is the best in the world. You must remember, you must take good care of Grandma in the future. It's okay if you don't take care of me, but if you don't take care of Grandma, I will chop you into porridge."

Grandma said and Clyde's jaw dropped. "You haven't realize you feelings at that time so why should I call a dumb person to hangout with us?" Grandma said and I laughed. "She didn't realize her feelings either." "No no.. I already admitted it." I said and Clyde raised his eyebrows. "Oh really? What did you say?" Clyde asked me, smirking. "She said that you're a big jerk of asshole.." Grandma said, making me laugh so hard. Grandma took my tuna bread and walked away. I slipped my arms to his hips.

“It’s delicious. Grandma, with tea this good, you could open a tea shop.” Mrs. Smith Sr. laughed, shaking her head. “At my age? I’m already in my seventies. I don’t have the energy for that anymore.” Liz winked. “Everyone says seventy is the new fifty. Isn’t this the time to chase new adventures?” Mrs. Smith Sr. chuckled. “You young people just love making fun of us old folks.” Liz stuck out her tongue playfully. “What can I say? Having a grandparent around is like having a little treasure at home.”

“ You could have told me, that way I would prepare some broth for you to relief the pain” “ No broth can relieve the pain I am feeling right now ”. “ But at least it will help relieve the pain. I am so happy for you, we need to celebrate, I am calling Trisha right away and all my friends, we need to throw a party ”. “ No, Grandma, I doubt that is important ”… “ Now Audrey, do not say that, Do you know how many of my friends laughed at me saying that my grandson cannot father a child, they have to see for themselves ”.

Lena choked on her food meanwhile I choked on my orange juice, Rosa chuckled and keep looking at me. “He said that was the most beautiful island on earth!” My grandma says. “He’s not going back, isn’t he?” Lena asks my grandma curiously. I nudged Lena's leg under the table and stared at her. “I have no idea, he’s not telling me anything besides that...” My grandma says while eating her dinner. “Mom, why are you talking about that in front of the kids?” My mom says while eating her food. “You have no sense of humor, my dear!” My grandma says.