Funny Sexual Jokes

Ang kamangmangan at kahirapan ang naging dahilan upang masadlak si Thalia Alvarez sa isang nakakapanghilakbot na pangyayari. Paano niya ipagtatanggol ang sarili na inosente siya gayung sa nakakatakot na tingin ng isang napakagwapong bilyonaryo na si Maximus Villaroman ay isa siyang kriminal? "Mamamatay kang mabubulok dito. Pero bago mangyari yun, papakinabangan ko muna ang katawan mo." NOTE: THIS BOOK CONTAINS SEXUAL AND ABUSIVE CONTENT. THIS IS A DARK ROMANCE AND NOT INTENDED FOR YOUNG, MINOR AND SENSITIVE READERS. PLEASE BE GUIDED.

BOOK TWO OF THE MAFIA MEN SERIES. *** He taught her how to live. She taught him how to love. *** Everyone called him a monster even the people who were close to him. But I was the only one who saw the troubled man hiding demons from his past. They called him a killing machine; he took lives without a second thought. But he saved mine, he saved me. I had no idea my savior would come in the form of a scarred face, covered in tattoos, who can't—or choose not to—speak a word to me. But I decided to take a risk. I opened the cage where his demons lived and I set them free. And then... I handed my heart to the monster to do as he pleased. TRIGGER WARNING: This book is provocative. It is categorized as DARK ROMANCE for a reason. It will not be for everyone. If you are a reader with certain triggers or sensitivities common to the dark romance genre then know that this book contains: a very dirty talker hero, sexual degradation, dubcon, rough play, and s&m themes

Upang huwag matuloy ang arrange marriage ni Franki Avella sa lalaking hindi pa niya nakikita at nakikila, nag pasyang maglayas ang dalaga. Nag disguised siya bilang pangit na babae sa katauhan ni Fancy upang walang may makakilala sa kanya. Namasukan siyang kasambahay nang binatang si Argel Montero. Meet Argel Montero - Tall, dark and handsome na secretly inlove sa kababata nito na si Steffie Carion. Na may iba naman na minamahal. Katulad ni Franki Avella ay biktima din ang binata nang arrange marriage ng mga magulang nito. Asot-pusa kung silang dalawa ay mag kasama na nauwi din sa pag mamahalan, na humantong din sa pag-iiwanan. Ngunit sadyang mapaglaro ang tadhana. Dahil ang lalaking ayaw ni Franki pakasalan ay walang iba kundi, si Argel Montero ang lalaking minsan na niyang nakasama at minahal. Minahal magpahanggang ngayon...

WARNING: R-18 l MATURE CONTENT l SPG l VERY SEXUAL l READ RESPONSIBLY I never knew I could feel so much pain and yet be so in love with the same person causing it. Ezra Monique grow up being independent. She was never valued. Her accomplishments were never recognized. She's always in a shadow of her older sister, second great and never the best. But all of that didn't matter to her. There's only thing that matter, to get the attention of the one man she always wanted, Atty. Tristan Angelo Gonzales. The same man her sister admired. He was uninterested with her but that doesn't stop her from getting his attention. She never stop bugging him until one day he was fed up. He insulted her and threw her out of his office. Broken and insulted she left the country to heal. Don't have plans of coming back. She became the woman every man desired. Successful in her own field. Living the life on her own, serene and untroubled. Everything is perfect for her, she is contented and happy in her own simple way. Life for her is good and not complicated. Not until the day she woke up being in a place she hated the most, with the people whom she never felt the love and acceptance, and with the situation she didn't expect. Will she be able to accept that she is now the Billionaire's Wife?

WARNING: Viewer discretion is advised. Contains graphic sex scenes, adult language and situation intended for mature readers only. R-18 "Touch me. Devour me. Savor in me and enjoy every minute of pleasure, Wade," - Rosenda Dela Vega Lahat tayo ay may kanya-kanyang swerte sa buhay, nasa atin na lamang kung paano natin hahanapin ito. Lumaki si Rosenda sa bahay ampunan ngunit dumating ang swerte sa kanyang buhay nang ampunin siya ng isang mayamang negosyante at haciendero na si Joaquin Dela Vega. Rosenda has it all. Fame. Money. Beauty. Power. Perfect heir to the Dela Vega Empire. Ngunit ito ay may isang kontrobersyal na sikreto. In-love siya kay Wade Dela Vega na nakababatang kapatid ng kanyang amain na si Joaquin but Wade is a womanizer, a strict Professor of the University that she's into and a cold hearted person kung kaya't sinubukan niyang akitin ito at makipaglaro ng apoy rito but over all he wanted his love more than anything else and not only lust. Magtagumpay kaya si Rosenda na baguhin ang isang katulad ni Wade?

“I want a divorce!” Angela said, staring at her young and handsome husband with her head high. “You had the nerve to tell me that? Fine! Who wants to stay married to an ugly and stupid woman?” Sky Mars scoffed, looking at her from head to toe. “How much do you want from me?” He asked, thinking she only married him for his money. “I don’t need your money, Sky. Only that,” Angela pointed at the beautiful handmade quilt on the bed. “Not only you’re ugly and stupid, but you’re also crazy. Take this, sign the divorce papers, and don’t ever come back,” He took the blue peacock design comforter on the bed, throwing it at her. She picked up the quilt that landed on the floor and turned her back on him, hugging the soft fabric as she walked toward the door. She did not bother correcting him that she is not ugly and stupid, but crazy? Maybe. She was probably insane falling in love with Sky, that not only the name and status is beyond her reach but also his heart.

Isabella Martinez's father died when she was eighteen years old. She had been separated from her mother at an early age and had no knowledge of the business her mother was involved in with her new husband. After her father's death, she is pushed into her mother's world, where she meets her husband and her husband's son, Alex. Alex is unlike any male she has ever encountered; he is cruel and demanding. He's harsh and intimidating. Alex was known to instill dread in individuals merely by glancing at them. Isabella is unaware that he is the world's most dreaded Mafia Don. Alex claims Isabella is his own the instant his eyes meet hers. Her stepbrother is a womanizer who astonished everyone when he claimed Isabella. Isabella is terrified and despairing; will she learn to accept her stepbrother into her heart? She shouted out, "Y-You can't do that." ❝You are my brother.❞ He chuckled at her as his fingers gripped her tiny lace underwear. ❝I am not your brother, neonata.❞ His lips were on her neck, nibbling her skin and moving down to her breast. ❝ Why are you doing this? She asked, biting her lip as his tongue touched her bud. ❝ Because you are mine.

To say that it was a love is an understatement, Tess White was obsessed with the one who hates her guts, and was completely in love with the idea of falling in love with Callum Anderson ever since she was young. However,Callum had a highschool sweetheart and life was at bliss for him until his world collided with Tessa and the next thing he knew, he was married to the girl he hated the most.

Book 1: Mated To The Alpha Kings Book 2: Return Of The Hybrid Queen Boo3: Enslaved By The Ruthless Vampire King Her name is Delaney. An addict! A girl who believes that no man on earth could satisfy her sexual cravings except herself... That's right, she's a masturbator. She hates the fact that she's that way but there's nothing she can do about it, her stepdad made it impossible for her to be with other men. Never once has she felt any kind of sensation whenever she's close to males, no matter how cute or handsome they are. No heart ripples nor butterflies dancing in her tummy, nothing! But all that changed when she met them.

Cayden Holstin is the third son of Alpha Liam and Luna Angel. In a family of seven, he’s the only one who hasn’t found his mate besides his underage sister. His oldest brother became the pack’s Alpha, his second oldest brother is their company’s CEO, and Cayd is currently in school to become the CFO. The human university was not exciting and fun like he was hoping, finding it difficult to hide who he is and bored with the females who only wanted casual relationships. Cayden is past ready to find his mate and settle down. Madelyn Cole is a human who was abruptly introduced to the werewolf world when she started dating a man she thought was human. It didn’t take long for him to bring her to his ‘pack’ and then refuse to let her leave. His aggressive, violent ways terrify her, and she tried to leave, but he refused to let her go. One night, in the middle of big party, Madelyn finds her opening and escapes, running as fast as she can When Cayd and the other Guardians realize that humans are being taken into werewolf packs as slaves and omegas against their will, they will have to make a stand, to fight as they always do for those who cannot fight for themselves. Cayd doesn’t care that his mate is a human. He trusts the Moon Goddess to give him the mate that is meant to be his. But Madelyn doesn’t want to live around the violent werewolves. She just wants to be left alone. Can Cayd convince her that he’s not like other wolves while keeping her safe from the one who is hunting her?