Funny Sexual Jokes

Maia just graduated and starts her new journey. She met the love of her life who changes her to become someone she never expected. Maia is an innocent narcissistic woman who strives to be on her best behavior. Her girlfriend named Lena runs an illegal business followed her father and drags Maia into the cartel ring. Lena is a snarky, manipulative, and street-smart woman, she has good survival skills, is calm, and usually has a good sense of humor when facing problems. Both Lena and Maia betray each other for personal gain, despite their feelings for each other. Lena is good at reading people and is perceptive. Maia experiences life chaos with her girlfriend, Lena. And that changes her became cruel, spoiled, and will be manipulative to get what she wants. But in the end, she just does what she needs to do to survive and protect the one she loves. Their adventure through love, pain, and sexual fantasies remain loyal to each other across time, distance, and silence which changes the way we see real love. Both of them end up behind bars and Maia is released before Lena. After her release, will Maia wait for Lena and be with her or start her new life? RATED 17+ This novel contains sex, nudity, and violence.

Shantal she's simple beautiful and innocent, namumuhay siyang masaya sa hacienda de monteverde at isa mga magulang niya ang kasalukoyan nag tatatrabaho sa loob ng malawak na hacienda ng mga monteverte at kilalang mayaman hindi lang dito sa pilipinas maging sa ibat ibang bansa at dito narin sila nanirahan simula ng mapadpad sila sa lugar at masasabi niyang masaya at maayos naman ang pamumuhay nila dito kasama ang mga magulang at mga kapatid niya. Sa idad niyang 18 never pa siya pumasok sa isang relasyos kasi gusto muna niya makapag tapos sa course niyang architecture kaya wala siyang time sa ibang bagay lalo na about sa lovelife o sexual b*b* siya pag dating sa bagay na yun kaya tinatawag siyang shantal the innocent. Pero pano kung isang araw dumating sa mundo niyang tahimik ang isang happy go lucky arogante pilyo bastos mata pobreng at higit sa lahat walang galang na c prince ace monteverde kaya niya kayang patutungohan ang binata at turuan ng tamang asal o mag papadala siya sa bugso ng damdamin at mauwi sa walang humpay na kaligayahan na silang dalawa lang ang nakakaalam kahit wala silang level ng binata, at tuloyan ng mag laho ang shantal na inosente. Si prince ace 25 years old happy go lucky walang derection ang buhay niya gasto dito gasto doon babae dito babae doon at ayaw din imanage ang sandamakmak na business ng mga magulang kaya sa inis at galit ng mga ito tinapon siya sa hacienda de monteverde ng matoto siya sa buhay hindi yung mag lustay lang ng kayaman nila. Ano kaya ang nag hihintay na kapalaran kay ace sa hacienda matatagpuan niya kaya dito ang ang magpapabago sa boa niyang pag katao at pananaw sa buhay..?

Dragged to a party by her best friend Meme, Lala has a chance run-in with the local biker king Spin, who ends up saving her life when she almost drowns, only to take over and destroy it! When she meets Jonny upon his departure from the Navy, Spin is forced into redemption! Will Lala choose the good guy or the bad boy?!

N/B Book contains dark and sexual scenes read at your discretion. ~ He burst into a peal of laughter at my agony and this time his eyes grew dark with rage as he gripped my head closer to his face. We were just an inch apart. My breathing turned labored and the sobs racked my throat. “I hate you Talitha. I hunted every town my spies saw you. I searched the deepest forest and farther into every pack of the world to fish you out. Finally, you’re here and this time I’ll make sure I’ll take everything that makes you special, gifted, and exalted and replace them with a broken, weak, and worthless slave, and not only that… I know you hate me, my name, and whose son I am. But that would change. I’ll fill you with me in every corner of your heart, soul, body, and blood. I’ll be so deep in your blood that when you bleed you bleed me.” *********** Witches are not accepted to be part of the kingdom of Arni where the evil Alpha king takes the women for his sexual gratification and kills and burns them alive at will. The evil king gets murdered and when the witches thought their persecution is over his son Alpha Hades- is out for the witches but first, he must conquer Tabitha's daughter. The daughter of the woman (Head Witch) who murdered his father and beheaded his poor mother and he must conquer her in spirit and on his bed by putting a collar on her neck as his slave and imprinting his essence on every inch of her perfect body. Can love grow from this unlikely pair of wolves and Witches or will their hate and revenge consume them in their quest.

Siya si Danielle, short for Daniella Marasigan Sandoval. Anak mayaman, kung kayat lahat ng gusto niya ay kanyang nakukuha. Sa katunayan siya ang nag isang anak ni Eduardo Sandovall, ang nagmamay ari ng pagawaan ng mamahaling sasakyan sa bansa. Maganda, mabait at higit sa lahat mapagmahal sa mga taong itinuturing siyang pamilya. Isa lang ang kulang sa kanyang buhay at ang pinakaasam asam niya, walang iba kundi ang atensiyon at pagmamahal ng kanyang ama. Lalaki kasi ang gusto ni Eduardo Sandoval na maging anak kung kayat sobra itong nadismaya ng babae ang lumabas noong manganak ang kanyang asawa na si Victoria Marasigan Sandoval. Muntik kasi itong mamatay nang ipanganak siya kung kayat hindi na siya nasundan o di kaya ay nagkaroon pa ng kapatid. Noong kabataan niya ay isa siyang prinsesa ngunit ng nagkaroon ng isip at nalaman ang dahilan kung bakit malayo ang loob sa kanya ng kanyang ama ay binago niya ang kanyang sarili. Mula sa magagandang bestida ay pinalitan niya ng maluluwang na t-shirts at jeans. Ang laruan niyang manika ay naging barilbarilan at ang pangarap niyang maging model ay naging taga kalikot ng makina ng mga sasakyan. Ang mga activities na kanyang sinasalihan ay para sa mga kalalakihan, kagaya ng karate, taekwando, shooting, motto cross, drag race at kung ano ano pa. Hindi naman iyon sinabi ng kanyang ama bagkus ay sarili niya itong pasya lalo na ng sabihin nito minsan na ayaw niya sa babaeng mahina kung kayat pati ang pagtatago ng emosyon ay praktisado na niya. Ngunit ang lahat ng kanyang effort ay tila hindi nakikita ng kanyang ama, bagkus ay bale wala ang lahat ng ito sa kanya.

Christopher Grayston só queria se casar para impedir que seu avô o pedisse em casamento novamente. Como resultado, ele se casou com uma garota que conheceu fora dos assuntos civis. Ele queria se casar com alguém com quem nunca consumaria o casamento. Então ele se contentou com uma jovem que acabara de conhecer do lado de fora do Departamento de Assuntos Civis, sabendo muito bem que não iria tocá-la porque ela era apenas uma garota. Camila Mendoza se encaixava no perfil desde jovem, embora fosse uma sedutora sem nem tentar. Os dois assinaram as certidões de casamento e seguiram caminhos separados. No entanto, 3 meses depois, o destino os uniu. Camila salvou uma criança e depois soube que o menino que ela salvou era filho de seu marido. Camila nunca se importou sobre como seu marido prostituto conduzia sua vida até que ela conheceu seu filho. Tudo estava bem até que sua ex-esposa voltou tropeçando em sua vida. Um homem que está sempre nas manchetes sobre sua vida sexual e uma esposa em uma missão. Quem triunfaria?

Elsie Miller, just an ordinary girl that lived in ordinary life. Her life turned chaos when she accidentally bumped into a little girl that attached to her immediately after the incident.Dexter Anderson, the mafia king that lost his family and it turned him to a cold hearted, ruthless and heartless mafia-broken mafia. The only family left was his niece, Andrea Smith. He devoted all his love to his niece and willing to do anything to create a smile on her face and she was the cause he trampled into Elsie's world."You can't reject me. Once I decided what I want, no one can say no to me and you are included. I will make sure you come to me and say yes to my face. Mark my words.”"Haha. Very funny mister whatever you are. Let's see how you are going to make me say yes!”"Well, challenge accepted.” He cut off the line afterwards without giving me chance to argue back. Arrogant and rude. Now, it convinced me more that this was the right decision ever for rejected his offer.

After graduating from NYU, Victory Sinclair had her life all planned out. Well, at least the career part, that is. She has been accepted into one of New York’s leading advertising and media agency and will be joining the agency as a personal assistant to the CEO. Little did she know, a strange twist of fate is about to change the course of her future. An unfortunate accident with Arthur Knight resulted in serious consequences that would alter both their futures. What will Victory do? Would she succumb to pressure or would she follow what her heart tells her to?

Kaiya is an orphan found on the doorstep of the packhouse of The Red Shadow Pack, she was brought in as an Omega and made to clean up after the often cold and almost always arrogant Twin Alpha Heirs, Ace and Dylan. I have decided to break this story into parts…there are four connecting stories with an overarching story that threads them together.  We start with Chasing Their Unloved Luna Part 1: Finding The True Alpha Next is Chasing Their Unloved Luna Part 2: Guarding The Faithful Beta. After that will be Chasing Their Unloved Luna Part 3: Seducing The Noble Priestess This book will conclude with Chasing Their Unloved Luna Part 4: Hunting The Storm Bringer We have seen lots of twists and turns and tons of unexpected happenings, and there are lots of loose ends at the close of Part One so please stick with us as we continue our Journey. In Part 2, the focus shifts. We will see Kaiya and the boys in the background and may even get a surprise POV when something big happens involving them, but  now we will see Amina’s and her sisters stories and how they meet their mates. Not all chapters I post have a trigger warning, but many contain violence, sexual violence and other devious acts. If it is particularly triggering I try to include a warning. Your mental health is important, so if you read the warning and can't handle what happens, skip to the following chapter, or only read the start of the next chapter then skip to the next Thank you and please comment and reach out if you have comments/questions.

***Warning this book does contain sexual assault, suicide attempt/ideation, physical violence, and adult language. Please read at your own discretion.***** Davina lives an ordinary human life with her parents, having no clue werewolves, vampires, elves and witches and warlocks truly exist. Everything changes when her family is attacked, leaving her orphaned and in the care of the man she believes is her uncle. But little does Davina know this isn’t the first time Davina has been left orphaned and the ones that raised her are not her parents. She has no idea just how important she is and how the magical world relies on her for their survival. Will the local Alpha of the Palmetto Pack be able to accept that Davina is his mate, despite her being the very reason his father is dead? Their meeting will spark a series of events that will unfold the mystery of Davina’s past and what she truly is.