Novel & Cerita Harry Potter Yo Mama Jokes

“But keep in mind, honey... this is a young virgin here. He won't last long, will you Harry? Especially not after you've had two girls sucking your cock today. A stepmother and daughter combo? That only happens in comically bad p**n films, doesn't it? Lucky little boy...” “I'm a believer now!” Harry gushed, putting his hands onto the back of Gwen's head to drive his cock in farther. She gagged instantly. Coughing slightly. “Dude, Harry what the fuck!” She spat, wiping down her mouth. “You trying to impale me on this fucking lamp post?!”

Mom says, laughing. “After the second one, I don’t even care if Lorenzo confuses anything anymore, after all, what’s soap in your hair compared to a good cum shot…” My mother-in-law says and laughs. “Look at the madness! What a thing! Do you want to traumatize me? I'm going to start talking about bitching too! You bastards!” I say ordering the whole damn thing and continuing.” Let’s go in, we have a lot of things to do, and no talking about naughty things in front of me, crazy people!” I speak and they both come in laughing, it's each other in this life.

Harry thought for a moment, then nodded and said, "So Mommy and Uncle Levi must be having fun, right? Last night I seemed to hear your mother exclaim, wasn't that game fun? Huh, such a fun game that Mom wouldn't play with Harry." Grainne's face instantly turned red to her ears, Harry heard her moan, she didn't want to live anymore! And Carwyn Levi lying next to him really couldn't help but laugh.

This is the first time I’ve heard her laughing. Harry isn’t even that funny. Just when I think I’ve seen it all, Harry clears his throat dramatically. “O CPU so fast, so bold, You heat my lap, yet never cold. Your fan doth scream, your ports do blink, My love for RAM? Stronger than you think. You crashed, I cried, I fixed your drive, With every update, we both survive.” What the fuck is this? Harry’s out here doing sonnets now? But that’s not what hits me in the gut. Not the poem. Not even the fact that she’s laughing.

Hannah replied. I sighed heavily. “My mum used to trick me the same way you just did. She would ask me to yawn, after yawning she would pour the tea down my throat and I would gag and rant. I would say that the tea is burning me and she would always remind me that werewolves are blessed with incredible throats.” “You can consider me your mother, Amber,” Hannah said. “But you’re really stupid to fall for the same trick after so many years!” Hannah resumed her uncontrollable laugh. I glanced at her angrily and headed for the bathroom.

I slowly nodded, not trusting my voice not to break right now. “Want to see if Chris is down for a movie marathon tonight? I’ll buy the snacks,” I could hear the smile in his voice, “It’ll be just like old times.” Chris was sitting in the row behind us, surely a middle finger to my mother. “Did I hear movie marathon and Chris?” his voice sounded from behind me. “Harry Potter?” “Hell yes!” Chris whisper-yelled, causing my mothers head to spin around like something straight out of a movie. If looks could kill; Chris would have been dead the moment her eyes met his.

"You're lying! I didn't steal any presents!" The words had just left my lips when Mom roared, "Claire Peterson!" She stormed toward me until she was standing in front of me. She grabbed my bloody arm and hissed, "How dare you talk back to Amanda and lie in front of everyone? You have utterly humiliated me, allowing everyone to ridicule me! I have no choice but to teach you a lesson you'll never forget." The pain should have been excruciating as Mom dug her fingers into my wounds. But I couldn't feel anything.

"Um, since you're back early, we could have an early lunch, just the three of us." "Oh that sounds great, we could go out to -" "No." My mother responded quickly. "Uhm - let's just stay in, we could order in. I don't really feel like getting dressed and leaving the house." She gave him a charming smile. "We could watch one of your stupid Harry Potter movies." "Harry Potter is not stupid!" I yelped. "Yes mum, Harry Potter is not stupid." My father spoke, placing his hand on his chest feigning offence.

Orion snorted, sending a spray of toothpaste into his beard. "Harriet, what kind of half-baked remark was that?" I shot her a dirty look. Harriet was losing her touch, if that's all she could come up with as an amusing comment. "You know, in Harry Potter, Harry could hear the snake moving around in the pipes." Harriet shook her head as she crossed her arms defensively. "I could hear you through the pipes. You guys were so loud I couldn't hear the echo of my own moans." I hopped to my feet and waddled over to the couch. I placed the back of my hand on Harriet's forehead. "No, you don't have a fever. Harriet, honey, I think that's the stupidest thing I have ever heard you say."

Now I know where Enya got that trait- like mother like daughter. I groan and give in. "Hippo-Twatamus. Cuntasaurus. Twatwaffle. Oh, and my absolute favourite, Pussysaurus-Rex." My voice drips with sarcasm as Enya struggles to suppress laughter, but her mother wastes no time in bursting out laughing. Great, not that I'm an Alpha or anything- from now on, I'll become the laughing stock of my mate and her mother. God, those two are going to be the death of me.