I Don't Feel So Good Mga Nobela at Kwento

AMELIA : I can't understand how i feel right now. I’ve been feeling unwell for several days since my friends spiked my drink that night. My joints hurt as if I have a flu. Especially in the mornings, I feel intense dizziness, and sometimes I even feel nauseous. Maybe I have an upset stomach.

I know where I'm coming from. I close the notebook shut and then lay my legs straight on the bed. I sigh, deeply. And then I sigh again. I feel like I'm going blank today. I was happy earlier. Mom is getting better. But now, I can feel a void in me. I don't know what this feeling is. It isn't related to romance, or money, or even mental exhaustion. It's something else. Something I can't figure out. Yet. I can't say it in words. It's like . . . Okay, I surrender. It's like a sinkhole. Or gap. Void. In me. Shit.

Hearing his words again, make me feel I really was loser. “Are you okay?” Feliz asked while trying to reach for my arms. “You’re paling. Are you sick?” I suddenly took hold on his arms and squeeze them. I can’t control the bad feeling inside. I feel dizzy, and my heart gone wild. It absolutely making me out of breath.

I blush, feeling all over the place. “What are you talking about?” He furrows his eyebrows. “I don’t know” I sigh, knowing what’s making me feel like this. Always coming at the worst times. Well that explains the nausea and jumbled emotions all day. “Lovely”

At this moment, it feels impossible but at the same time, I can't help but feel bad for him. I sighed and laid back on my bed. Today has just been a very long awful day. I looked at my phone and I still had nothing. It feels like something really bad is going on. I can't anywhere right now because it late and dangerous. It's bugging me a lot. I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight.

It’s all such a blur. Today, I am somewhat detached from reality, a little numb, and for sure, I feel vulnerable and sensitive. I cannot think straight and I don’t have the energy even to try. I truly feel like this entire month has been one long sob fest, and I don’t think I can take any more drama. “I’m sorry for all of this. The way I am inconveniencing you all. Your poor mother sleeping on that hard couch every night, and you running food back and forth.”

“But with everything going on, it’s better to be safe than sorry.” I swallowed hard. It was true; lately, I had felt… off. More tired than usual. A bit woozy, especially during the first few hours of the day. And slightly feverish. I assumed that I was developing a cold, probably partially due to lack of sleep and not eating properly, but now I wasn’t so sure.

She has always been able to tell when something is bothering me. I may say I'm fine, But I'm not fine. I now feel this hurt inside. Ever since the day that I found my mate things just haven't felt the same for me. Knowing my mate is out there, but doesn't want me just leave me dull inside. I was once happy, but now I don't really feel like I have much to be happy about. I don't want to do anything. I don't want to be around anyone. I just want to be alone with my thoughts as I cry to myself.

How do you feel? 'Would it be wrong if I say, I don't have any idea how I feel?' 'Is that a bad thing?' 'Maybe not. It doesn't feel scary.' 'Look Jovy, I know it's not actually my place or maybe I am not one to tell you this. But I really don't feel good about all of this. Jovy, it feels like you are getting yourself into a deep shit that you can ever imagine.'

“So how was your day?” “Good news, I made it on time. Bad news, that meeting was boring AF and the rest of the day sucked.” “Can't be that bad.” “I was seriously considering jumping out the window. I was barely even paying attention half the time. Not to mention, I was on my feet the whole day, even during lunch because I was eating while working. So right now, I feel like shit.” “So maybe it was. At least that makes two of us. The feeling like shit part, I mean.”