I Will Never Be Good Enough Novels & Stories

She allowed her mind to wander. While she went through the familiar motions, negative thoughts burst forth like it was the most natural thing to do. /This won't do./ /This isn't enough./ /Still not it./ /Inadequate. I'm just no good. Why do I bother? No matter how many times I do this, I'm never good enough. I'll never be good enough. Who am I kidding? I'm tired. I'm sure anyone else can do this better than me. I'm a failure and I'll always be a failure. Dad, Mom, Big Brother, Erica, WHY? Why do you still love me? How do you still have hope in me? I don't want to let you all down. I know I will, but I really don't want to. What should I do? How can I get stronger so that I won't have to rely

“Ridiculously, I couldn’t be satisfied no matter how many times we made love as if I had consumed a certain medicine. Although I used those girls to piss you off, I didn’t have any interest in having sex with them.” “I truly regret everything, Shannon. I misunderstood you and simply put the blame on you. I’ve made so many mistakes that hurt you, but we can’t change the past, and we can’t go back anymore. What I can do is to compensate you for the rest of my life. Shannon, give me a chance to do something for you, please?” “Shannon, I know you always thought that you were the one chasing after me, and I always ignored you, right? In fact, I like you more than you like me. You can never imagin

Like it was so wrong to even look up to him. That at any time, at least once, I could never dream of him. Because as I look at him from afar ... I feel, ever, I will never matter to him. I will never be enough. Never. Not even in my wildest dreams.

"The worst thing is that I don't even know how to correct my wrongs." I close my eyes, pressing my forehead to my knees as the first part of rain start to drop from the sky, wetting me. "I just want to be ready. I don’t want to lose anyone else because I wasn’t enough. I don't want to lose to anyone because I wasn't enough." 'Then stop thinking you’re not enough.' Nyra murmurs. I snort. "It's not that easy, Nyra." I look at the sky as the rain intensifies.

“Do you know how much it fucking kills me, watching you try to make me hate you? Watching you act like we’re nothing? Like this is nothing?” Something in me cracked. “What do you want me to do, Elliot?” I snapped, my voice breaking. “Defy your mother? Fight an impossible battle just to be with you? You don’t understand what it’s like to be constantly reminded that I’ll never be good enough for your family!” His expression twisted, pain flashing across his features. “You are good enough.” “No, I’m not,” I whispered, my throat tightening. “Not to them. And eventually, they’ll break us.”

I’m not that strong. “I just…” My voice cracked, and I took a moment to breathe before speaking. “I just feel like there must be something wrong with me. I am a good person. A good daughter, a good wife. But those things never seem to be enough. My stepsisters barely have their lives together, yet they are shown love every single day. Apparently, Olivia is bad for Adrian’s life and business, but he seems to love that. Being me, being good, it’s never enough. I’ve just never been enough.” Naomi’s face softened, her eyebrows lifted, and the frown lines that had formed at the corners of her mouth left.

Why am I never enough? Right now, I feel like giving up on love completely. Maybe love was never meant for me. Maybe it’s not part of my destiny. Maybe I’ve been chasing a fairytale that was never mine to begin with. The truth hits me hard, Luca doesn’t love me. And he never will. I don’t want to keep doing this to myself. I’ve had enough.

“What are you talking about?” “You’re giving yourself like a reverse pep talk, where you talk down to yourself. Stop it!” She demands. I rest my head back on the headrest and breathe in a shaky sigh. “Faith. I mean it. No bad thoughts. You are not responsible for his actions!” “Ok yeah, but he acted a certain way because I’m not good enough. I’m never good enough. I wasn’t a good enough daughter, I’m still not, clearly, because mom loves dad more than me and clearly I was a horrible girlfriend because I didn’t even make it past the first freaking date.”

“I’ve been too afraid to say anything. To you. To myself. But I miss her. I miss you. And I… I’m failing her.” “You’re not failing her,” I said softly. “She adores you. She knows you care.” “No, she doesn’t understand the depth of it,” he said, running a hand through his hair. “I keep thinking that if I could just be… better… if I could just be less broken, maybe things wouldn’t be so complicated. Maybe I wouldn’t be standing here, trying to convince someone I’m not a disaster.” I leaned forward. “Evan, you’re human. You can’t fix everything. You just… show up. That’s enough.”

This is not funny I swear. I slowly squatted down and picked up the paper which is tainted by some red thick liquid. ~ Don’t be confused. It’s me. It’s all my fault. I just want the best, but always ended up failing. I’m not a good person to begin with. I’m not a good mother. And I will never be. Please curse me out for everything. Don’t forgive me. I don’t deserve any. ~