Kenapa Belum Siap Aku Kehilangan Dirimu Mga Nobela at Kwento

the footsteps suddenly stopped '2 years' who is she waiting for? Why is it so heartbreaking, why is it so sad, the one you wait for is not me, I don't match the 2 years that man abandoned you but you're still waiting. My heart is broken, but my steps still keep coming to you. “Hey, how are you?”

My regrets began to paint a vivid picture—one I was reluctant to erase, so I surrendered to it. “Vale,” I whispered, my voice cracking under the weight of my sorrow. “I don’t know what to do. I’m lost without you... Why do I feel so adrift without you?" In the silence that followed, I felt a flicker of warmth, an intangible brush against my spirit. I wanted to believe it was him, that he was here with me, even if only in a way I couldn't perceive. I couldn’t see him, nor could I feel his fur beneath my fingers, but I sensed his essence lingering in the air, an echo of the bond we had shared—the bond he had left when he marked me.

"This world is not made for a woman." And I guess you said to me, "Fuck you." That is when I lost you for the first time! I couldn't feel you; you had disappeared into nothing. For a while, I wondered whether it was possible to live life without a pulse. "Please come back! Please!" I kept yelling. I wasn't sure whether I was yelling that for your sake or mine. Then it hit me. You are not ever going to come back again. I felt like an anchor that just sank to the bottom of deep, dark ocean waters. I throbbed with sadness, and there was nothing I could do to get you back.

I sniffed. “Living in the insecurity of losing my ray of hope, afraid to lose my liberation. My dreams shattered, I have lost my will to live, you were my other half, how could you do this to me?" Tears streamed down my face as I began to cry and continued. "I have asked myself this over and over again, why you? You could have talked to me about it, I was willing to leave everything behind for you.” Growling, I curled my hands in a fist.

A tear slid down my face. “But please.” God. I had never begged anyone for anything in my life. Not truly. But I would beg now. For her. Forever if necessary. “Please stay.” My shoulders shook once as another wave of emotion hit hard. Because I wasn’t ready. I wasn’t ready to lose her after finally understanding us. I wasn’t ready to become a man haunted by what could have been. I wasn’t ready to walk through our home and feel her absence everywhere. And worst of all—

“Where the hell were you when I needed you?!” He flinched, as though he hadn’t expected it, but the intensity in his eyes didn’t waver. He opened his mouth, probably to answer, to apologize, to give me some excuse for the months he had been absent. “I waited,” I said, my voice breaking despite my best efforts to keep it controlled. “I waited for you to care. I waited for you to be here. And you weren’t. You weren’t here. And now you just show up and expect what? That I’ll forget? That I’ll let you…”

I’m sorry I didn’t come to you sooner. The truth is, I’ve been stuck somewhere between life and death. And now that I’m back… I’m not sure how long I have. There’s a part of me that’s afraid to hope, afraid to write this… because what if it all gets taken away again? But I had to write. I had to tell you. You deserved more than silence. You were always stronger than you gave yourself credit for, and I need you to be strong again for me. Don’t cry. Don’t mourn me yet.

The mere notion of a tomorrow without her by our side paints a desolate panorama, drained of vibrancy and happiness. I cannot bear the thought of losing her forever. I will persist, against all odds, until I can prove that my love for her is steadfast and true. For Xeraphina, for Talon, and for the hope that lingers in the depths of my heart, I will not surrender to her rejection.

“You are bound.” I blink. “Bound? To what?” No response. “Why didn’t we shift on my birthday? Why have you stayed silent all this time?” My voice rises with each question, desperation bleeding through. “Do you know how crazy I’ve felt? Watching others become whole while I just... waited?” A sigh drifts through my mind, like wind through dead leaves. “There are things you’re not ready to remember. Things buried too deep. If I spoke then, I might’ve broken you.”

It left me feeling less than human, a mere husk of a man undeserving of her love, care, and presence. The pain of her absence was a constant agony, a relentless torture that quickly left me wishing for oblivion, for an end to the unbearable consciousness of my own existence. As my release day loomed, my desperation reached its peak. I sent a bombardment of messages to Penelope, each a combination of apologies and pleas for her to come back, for any sign that I hadn't completely destroyed everything between us. The silence from her end was deafening. Each read but ignored message confirming my worst fears.