Potato Jokes Novels & Stories

"Here. Peel the potatoes, carrots, and cucumbers, then cut them into pieces." I puffed up my chest. "I can do that!" I declared in an exaggerated high-pitched voice. She smiled—just a small one. My joke was not that funny, but I wanted to lighten the mood. And after being downgraded to a child in her eyes, I wanted to prove her somewhat wrong. "Good," she nodded, turning back to the fridge. For a second, I thought she wasn’t going to talk to me for the rest of the night. But then—"You just sounded like Catherine Tate. Have you seen her show?"

Mom glared at the naughty sextuplet. [ ** NOTE TO THE READERS: Potato Bombs are small domestic explosives made using a potato. They can be made at home. They may be harmless, noisy crackers but it is better not to try them at home without proper supervision ** ] “You ruined the prank, Mom !” Kai whined. “You were not supposed to tell him !!” he cribbed. “Ashton dear, please prescribe something for this wild one too,” Mom said while c*cking her head towards a pouting Kai, making us all laugh.

Bright and early the next day, I showed up at the office as usual. I ignored the whispers and stares, and made a beeline for my desk to start clearing it out. That was when Lily waltzed over, oozing fake sympathy. "Janice, can't you take a joke? "Come on, it was just a little toilet cleaning. Why'd you have to go and tell Mr. Hoffman you're quitting? No need to blow things out of proportion. "Look, I'll even dip into my own wallet and toss you a little extra cash to make up for it.

I showed her a bucket of the already peeled potatoes. This was the first time in my life I had ever peeled a potato, and the first few minutes into it had been incredibly awkward, especially since I had lied to Josephine that I was a nobody running away from her past demons. She'd not asked any more questions. But it has been apparent to her that I was in fact not from humble beginnings since I had almost chopped my hand off while peeling the potatoes. The poor woman had done everything to hold back her shock and laughter. It didn't take a long time for me to get the hang of it after she'd taught me the technique.

He's about to loose it. "I'm last. Banana right? Fine, just don't laugh. You must be a banana, 'cause I find you very A-PEELING?" I said rather in question since I wasn't sure if my joke was funny or not. But surprisingly, they all laughed. That's a relief. "Oh, this one. It's an Olive. OLIVE you so much that it hurts! HAHAHA!" Ione remembered. "That's nothing, listen to mine. You make my heart skip BEET! HAHAHA! The vegetable! Burned!" Harry said.

"Try that instead." He fumbles at the potato, drawing off a sliver of peel. "Ah, yes. That's much easier." Still, I keep half an eye on what he's doing. "Not that one," I say, pointing to the potato in his hand. "It's green." "Oh..." Richard stares at the tuber. "There were a few green ones at the top of the sack. Is something wrong with them?" "You can poison yourself with green potatoes. That's why you store them in the dark. So they don't go green."

he replied, taking a bite out of a potato and chewing it thoughtfully, I wouldn't want to stare at his lips for too long. His crazy friends might still be gazing at us from behind, I didn't want to leave a hint to them that I'm gay. I wonder if Keith is staring as well, he hadn't looked at me when I walked past him. "Great. I love potatoes as well." I said adding sour cream to the potato which I ate. "You do?" Billy smiled as I met with his eyeballs. "In that case, perhaps I should take you to a restaurant that specializes in potatoes," he suggested a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. "We could try so many different dishes."

“You scared me! Geez!” What was her name again? Piper? Pepper? “Hey! Yo momma is so ugly that if Shrek had a live action film, she wouldn’t even pass as the donkey,” I laughed out loud at my own joke while staring mockingly at the cat, as if it was Juno I was talking to and insulting directly.

I'm guessing u didn't laugh tate_kvngh: I laughed, Eddie. Don't worry. You didn't really embarrass yourself that much. T'was a good one. tate_kvngh: I have one for you too, knock knock. EdwardBlack1794: that's more like it cupcake :D Who's there? tate_kvngh: Harmony EdwardBlack1794: harmony who? tate_kvngh: harmony knock knock jokes do you have? tate_kvngh: HAHAHAHAHAHA laugh with me or I'll hate you forever >_<

Something she had protected, saved, and carried in her storage like a stupid little dream she refused to throw away even after Earth died around her. Then she started laughing. She grabbed a few baskets from her storage space and started collecting, moving from plant to plant while the babies pulsed with excitement inside her. Every bush gave more than it should have. Potatoes kept tumbling out, each one feeling more impossible than the last. The ten pieces she had planted gave her four hundred and eighty potatoes. “Four hundred and eighty,” Vera whispered, then laughed again because the number sounded insane. “Babies, we are rich. We are potato rich.”