Potter Jokes Novels & Stories

I've just left the washroom when Vanessa Shallow, who has just returned from her maternity leave, covers her mouth as she laughs at me. "Wow, you really are quick when it comes to bathroom breaks, huh? No wonder your sales performance is increasing by leaps and bounds! I suppose it's all thanks to your ability to take off your pants very quickly!" Vanessa acts as though she's joking as she starts making faces at the male colleagues around us. "Right, I forgot how prideful young ladies are nowadays! They can't seem to accept such truths when spoken in such a blunt manner!" The colleagues burst out laughing in a lecherous way afterward. Their perverted gazes keep clinging to my legs the whole time. As I stare at Vanessa's slightly bloated face, my gaze grows cold. It seems that she's so anxious to get her position as the project leader back that she's willing to shed even her sense of shame and propriety. I take a step forward and speak up. "I'm not as skilled as you are when it comes to such things, Vanessa. After all, not everyone is capable of making Mr. Studdard visit their home every midnight during their maternity leave." As soon as my words fall, the previously rowdy office goes deathly silent.

Since the very first time Hunter Jones laid his eyes on a petite Asian , Mey Wang, he couldn't take his eyes off her. The resident bad boy is willing to duck his nose deep in Harry Potter books and learn every spell known just to get closer to the Potter-head . Mey likes Hunter but not in a romantic way. She thinks they're too different. She's a nerd and he's a bad boy. Of course, there're a lot of books about a bad boy and a nerd falling in and walking to the sunset together but she's not just a nerd, she's also an Asian. Her parents are old-fashioned people, they'd never approve of someone like Hunter. So she tries her best to escape him. But can you really escape ? There's a potion in the spellbook but there's no un- potion, right? QOTD: Don't let fear or insecurity stop you from trying new things. Believe in yourself. Do what you . And most importantly, be kind to others, even if you don't like them. Stacy London. Started: 08.01.18 Completed: 22.02.18

Freya Laurent returns to the Blackwood Pack after five years, eager to reunite with her adoptive family. But the moment Alpha Dane, the man who's been her protective brother since childhood sees her, his wolf claims her as his fated mate. ‎ ‎Caught between duty and desire, Dane fights his primal urges while Freya struggles with dreams and an inexplicable pull toward the one man she shouldn't want. When jealous warrior Selene allies with rival Alpha Viktor, their attacks awaken ancient powers within Freya. ‎ ‎She's not just human. She's the Moon Goddess's last descendant, and everyone wants her power. ‎ ‎Can love conquer blood? Or will destiny destroy them both?

Ethan Hale never thought desperation would drive him here. He was suffering from a failed engagement, rent was overdue and his pride was hanging by a thread when the discreet contract landed in his lap. A year of surrender to a man who can buy and break anyone? Insanity. Dominic Blackwell isn’t just anyone. He’s ruthless. He’s magnetic. He’s a billionaire with a hunger for control that borders on obsession. And he wants Ethan… body, mind, and soul. What begins as a business arrangement quickly turns into something darker, something Ethan swore he wasn’t capable of craving. Every touch leaves him raw, every command strips him bare, and every night pushes him deeper into a world where pain and pleasure blur until he can’t tell the difference. Ethan told himself he was straight. He told himself this was just about money. But Dominic has a way of dragging out the parts of Ethan he never dared to face: the fantasies, the submission, the need to be owned. One year. That’s all Ethan agreed to. But in Dominic’s arms, rules are broken, lines are crossed, and one year might not be enough to survive…or to let go.

The whole world knew Lionel Potter was crazy about his wife. He wrote songs just for her, baked desserts for her, and couldn't go three sentences without saying "my wife". But Iris Potter discovered that the same Lionel who loved her as if his life depended on it had cheated. She summoned the system and applied to leave the world. [Understood. The self-exit channel has been activated. In 15 days, you will leave this world. The exit method will be a staged death. The location will be the seaside where you once saved the male lead. Cause of death: suicide by drowning. [Please prepare accordingly for your death.] On the 15th day, Iris arranged everything and staged her departure to look like she had gone into the sea, leaving Lionel behind. Only then did Lionel wake up. He unraveled, nearly losing his mind, consumed by the need to find her.

Man dies. His last act in the previous life generates him an absurd amount of karma. He meets a god, and it reborns him in a crossworld of Larry Potter and DxD. He gets a gift, one that can only be fully explored with the knowledge that he learned in his previous profession in the previous world. The keeping of knowledge is also a gift. And with that, his karma is spent. Thrown in the world with a 'good luck' and a slap in the back, he fights to survive until the start of canons. The time until that, 1000 years. Yeah… Now read about some of his adventures in this crossed over world, beginning already in HP canon. English is not my main language, so you will find some strange stuff, like the mix of North American and the Queen’s English. Disclaimer: All characters that you recognize from the franchise of Larry Potter and DxD are propriety of its respective creators and I only wish that they were mine. But they are not. I only own the MC, the OCs, and the ideas that generated the non canon plot.

The day I decided to file for divorce, Dean Potter couldn’t wait to draft the divorce agreement. Five years ago, he had been forced to marry me, and now he was finally free. On the day we were finalizing the divorce, Dean arrived with his new flame, radiating delight mixed with a hint of mockery. “Veronica Byrd, look at you—you’re miserable.” I watched his figure fade into the distance, my vision blurring. Miserable? In the next life, it wouldn't happen again.

On the day of my marking ceremony, my fated mate, Jason Potter, was caught having an affair with my younger sister, Vivian Tallow, on the altar. I became the laughingstock of the entire pack. My childhood friend, Alpha Dominic Carlton, decided to make a vow and mark me on the spot in order to preserve what little pride I have left. He spent the next four years taking good care of me and showering me with love. With great difficulty, I managed to get pregnant with his pup, thinking that I finally found a place I could call home. But one day, I overhear a conversation between Dominic and his Beta. "You're too cold-hearted, Alpha Dominic! Aurora has shown nothing but devotion toward you, and yet you decide to make her a breeding tool just so you can protect Vivian?" "Vivian is an Omega. She can't handle the pain of labor. But she needs a pup in order to cement her status in the Potter family. "As for Aurora, I'll tell her that her pup has died prematurely. When the time comes, I'll cast her out of the pack territory with the excuse of her miscarriage. Either that, or I'll make sure that she'll be silenced permanently." It turns out that Dominic has lulled me into a false sense of security just so he can ensure that I can become his breeding tool. I make a beeline for a secluded healing center immediately. "I'm not going to give birth to this filthy pup anymore." I'll be kissing this fake mate bond goodbye, too.

At the company's year-end party, a colleague asks me teasingly about when exactly my boyfriend, Hayden Potter, and I will get married. Hayden's female buddy, Melissa Somers, instantly speaks up for him. "He's not in a rush. After all, Hayden's main priority is his career." At first, I don't think much about Melissa's response. But the next thing I know, I suddenly hear her internal thoughts. [Marriage? When Hayden was sleeping over at my place, he promised me that he'd marry me!] I freeze up on the spot before whirling around to stare at Hayden and Melissa. At the moment, Melissa is taking a sip from Hayden's drink through the same straw he just used. Hayden never once looks at me. In fact, he even has an arm wrapped around Melissa's shoulders.

Meadows Potter spent eight years of her life with a man who had only vowed to marry her if she gave him her body. Naive enough, she fell for it despite her best friend’s warning, only to wake up the next day and find out he was already married. Weeks later, she discovered she was pregnant. With no other choice, she had to find a man who would pretend to be her boyfriend while she stayed for two months with her relatives in LA. It shouldn't have been her best friend. Not Cody Larson, a.k.a. Ice. Not the notorious dirt biker her parents despised, and especially not the man who was secretly, deeply in love with her—though she was blind to it. Will she fall for him during their time in LA, or will her thirst for revenge and stubborn blindness destroy the very love she had been craving all her life? Find out now in Best Friend's Shouldn't Date.