Skinny Jokes Novels & Stories

Then someone in the crowd sneered, their voice dripping with sarcasm. "Oh, that must be Sophia's sugar daddy. Showed up to defend her. She's not picky, is she. She'll take a guy in his fifties." The crowd erupted. Some covered their mouths, laughing. Others joined in openly. "Yeah, I heard she doesn't care about age. Maybe this old man's a regular too." The dean's expression tightened. He turned sharply toward the crowd. "All of you–shut your mouths!" He glanced at my injuries, his voice urgent.

How come Enid never saw this? "So the chips said to the potato maybe you should try shedding off your skin and staying in shape only then would you swim in the hot tub " The skinny girl burst forth in a muffled laugh. Okay, that was a pretty corny joke but I laughed regardless. I needed the perfect icebreaker. "How do you do that?" I asked when I recovered from my laugh. "Just like a good shot of tequila, it keeps getting better." The skinny girls smiled and quickly added, "I'm Mia by the way."

The other two girls giggled, as well, and Riley chuckled. “No,” Cindy snickered. “I’m Cindy.” “Oh, that’s right,” Amy declared. “I forgot. Sorry. Go ahead, Cindy, tell us your joke.” “Okay. What did one casket say to the other casket?” Amy glanced at Riley, but the awareness in his eyes made her look away. “I don’t know,” she said. “What did one casket say to the other casket?” Cindy giggled. “Is that you coffin?” Amy laughed. The joke was funny enough on its own, but the impish look on Cindy’s face was even more amusing, making Amy laugh all the harder. “That’s a good one, Cindy.”

Forgot to tell you sooner. He had sent me messages almost three hours ago. I smile and reply. Me: That’s Ok! Sorry I didn't answer you sooner. I didn’t feel like attending, so I skipped. As we reach home, I behold myself to receive some lame one-liner about skipping classes. Some of his jokes are funny, but sometimes these are so stupid it makes me chuckle, wondering why does he even bother? “Did you know that a waffle on a California beach is called a Sandy Eggo?” He had tried this joke last evening.

“I always know how to cheer people up. Want me to tell you a bad joke?” I sniffed again. “No.” She grinned wider. “Too late. What do you call fake spaghetti?” I groaned, pressing my face into my sleeve. “Riley, please.” “An impasta,” she said, bursting into laughter at her own joke. Despite myself, I laughed too. It came out choked, but it was laughter all the same. She looked so proud of herself for making me do it that I had to keep laughing. “God, you are ridiculous,” I said, shaking my head.

They chuckle lightly at my joke and I'm glad it didn't go over their heads. “This is your first time meeting us”. One of the men says…I've genuinely forgotten his name and pack. “What do you think? Do you also think Fern is a dickhead?”. The Fern in question throws a butter knife, landing it perfectly between the man's hands on the table. “Shut up, Keren”. I can't tell if it's a joke but Keren doesn't flinch, just turns to me and shrugs in mock surrender. “I told you”. He says. The table chuckles again and I realize then that it must be a joke. What…a unique sense of humor.

He says proudly, looking to his left at his friends. I run the tip of my tongue over my top teeth, leaning over the bar and I look the sleazy prick right in his poo brown eyes. "Show me your dick, and if it's the biggest bastard I've ever seen, I'll let you touch my tits," I say in a cruel tone knowing full well that he has a small dick. It's been spreading around the clubhouse like a plague. He's the butt of many small dick jokes and the prick is too slow to realise they are all about him.

She hissed, “we need to leave immediately!” “Alright, alright.” I patted her arm. “I’ll just get the eggplants.” I turned and beamed widely at the worried girl. “Have you seen a brinjal this big and shiny?! It’s like—.” “A cock soaked in cum,” someone said. What...? My face feel deadpanned as it swivelled up to voice. An elderly man in Einstein’s age and appearance was bellowing in laughter at his own dirty joke, his round belly shaking uncontrollably.

Gianni leaned on both of us, though I was pretty sure he was exaggerating his weakness just a bit to get his way. Once we reached the garden, Gianni perked up almost immediately, his eyes twinkling. “Dante, Alora, you both need a bit of cheering up. I have a good joke—Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had nobody to go with!” he said with glee, as if he hadn't just cracked a silly dad joke. “Are you serious, Gianni? That was so bad!” I countered, shaking my head even as I laughed.

His arms tighten looking for my acceptance of his apology. "I understand. You're a man in demand. This is the part where you have to save the Internet by pressing buttons on your laptop, right?" Finn relaxes his grip a little at my joke. "Kind of, but I type fast. Some might even say I'm a speeding bullet." Even I catch his Superman reference and groan at the horribleness of it, but it's nice to hear one of his nerdy jokes again. Maybe nothing is wrong after all.