Soccer Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

I respond furiously. “I do apologize for everything. Therefore, I want to make it up to you.” Alexander replies. “You can make up for paying for the damages.” I started to get annoyed. “Fine, but you will regret not taking my offer.” “This is not the way to get a girl’s attention. This is the most horrible pickup line anyone has ever tried with me.” Oh, gosh. Why did I say that? There was a moment of silence. Then Alexander spoke. “Please just agree to get a coffee with me tomorrow?” He says with sincerity in his voice.

I was flirting and the words bounced from my lips smoothly like butter. “And how many girls have you used that pick-up line on Kade?” “You, feel free to tell me if it’s working or if I need to up my game” Good God, I sounded like a sordid suitor trying to get in a woman’s pants after the first kiss. And that’s the fucking thing, I hadn’t even kissed her yet and I was this whipped. “Ooh you need to up your game buddy, where I come from men have better game than you”, she was teasing but I growled.

’’ I said trying to control my laugh while everyone else was busy chatting as adults they were. ‘’ Now you are hurting my feelings. Pick-up lines are not meant to be funny. They are supposed to be flirting.’’ He said in reply. ‘’ but nothing like that is happening. I am quite impressed by your memory. Or is it that you mess with many girls.’’ I replied. ‘’ you can say I have a good memory. But about trying it with everyone. Not everyone can catch my eyes as you did.’’ He said showing me his Dollar Smile.

A masterclass in conversation. One corner of his mouth lifted. “Maya.” I blinked. “You know my name?” That grin widened slightly. “Should I not?” I opened my mouth. Closed it. Opened it again. “Most football players don’t know my name.” Something flickered across his face. Amusement. Maybe curiosity. “Then those football players are idiots.” For the first time all night, I didn’t know what to say. And somehow that felt more dangerous than any cheesy pickup line. Beside me, Bree was practically vibrating with excitement.

“Not everyone is destined to be mopy all day.” “I was happy this morning.” Flipping him off, he just laughed and sat down on the other side of Jo. “Seriously, why are you so happy?” Beau leaned over Jo and looked at him. “I used this sick pickup line on a girl and it worked.” “I got one for you.” I said, glancing at Steele. “Oh yeah? Let’s hear it.” All eyes turned to me as I set my rag down. “Are you a smoke detector? Because you won’t shut up and fucking annoying.”

Now that she was up close, she could see the lines around his eyes and mouth. He had to be at least late 50s, maybe even early 60s. But he wasn’t wearing a wedding ring, so that counted for something. “You have good taste,” she giggled. “I’ll have what he’s having,” she said to the bartender. “Are you watching the game?” Beatrice said slyly. “I am,” he told her. “Are you a soccer fan?” “Who isn’t?” Beatrice lied. She didn’t know a thing about soccer, but that didn’t matter. Feigning interest would keep him engaged.

My gaze dropped, almost against my will, to the wall over his shoulder. A vinyl sticker, nicked at the corner, clung to the painted cinderblock: STRIKERS. Bold block letters. Beneath it, a laminated schedule. Home vs. Riverton – 6 PM. A black Sharpie arrow circling Media – 12:30. The bench through the crack in the stall door held a scatter of shin guards and a duffel with the team crest. The air, suddenly obvious, was a cocktail of men’s deodorant, turf, and detergent. Not lavender body spray. Not cherry lip gloss.

I scroll to his flirty texts. Hot soccer legend: I miss your tits. Me: Wow. What about the rest of me? Me: also I’m in class you jerk. Hot soccer legend: I mean the rest of you is not that bad either. Me: Fuck off. Hot soccer legend: I’m just kidding. You know I like all the other parts of you. The way you taste. . .your touch, that feeling when I’m inside you. It turns me on just thinking about it. Fuck I want you Kayla.

I started reciting all the cringy, weird and perverted pick up lines I could think of, all the while watching the jerk King lose his cool. I put my hand over my heart to make my performance seem unfeigned, looking all touched and moved, a bit misty-eyed too. "DARLING, who'd have ever imagined you to be so naughty when you asked me if I sat in sugar because I've got such a sweet ass... I mean buttocks(I feared these primordials would mistake my ass for a donkey if I didn't enlightened them with the specifics). That I'm in all of your inappropriate..."

"I come every once in a while to, how do I explain this, um, scope out a potential lover." I feel a kick in the front of my pants. I wasn't expecting her to be so blunt, and it's kind of a turn-on. She's right. She doesn't act like the other girls. "Really?" "Soccer players are full of drama, so either they need to be reminded of what great lovers they are after a loss or they want someone to reiterate what great gods they are after a win. Either way, I get some good sex. If it's a visiting team, I never have to see the person again. It works for me."