Very Funny Jokes

Pelican Bay Security is full of hot former Navy SEALS, a small costal town in Maine (with a crime problem), and a group of Bakery Girls waiting to cause trouble. When I moved here to set up a new security company as a fugitive recovery specialist, I didn’t plan to find my next-door neighbor breaking into her aunt’s house. I also didn’t expect the random henchmen harassing her for diamonds she insists she doesn’t have.Tabitha is running from an ex-boyfriend, and I desperately want to help. As a former Navy SEAL I have the skills to deal with almost any idiot willing to give his girlfriend a black eye. Her lies, drama, and ex-boyfriend catch up with her and it may not be something I can handle on my own. I just hope if things turn violent, we both come out alive.A fun, humorous romantic suspense series from USA Today bestselling author, Megan Matthews!#explicit #Suggested age 18+Pelican Bay Security is created by Megan Matthews, an eGlobal Creative Publishing Signed Author.

Bexan Ivanov witnesses a surprise terror attack during his 13th birthday and loses his father in the middle of the terror attack. A terrorist attempts to kill Bexan but fails because a heroic girl with a sniper saves him. Later Bexan knew, the heroic girl who saved him is actually an agent who works in a hidden agency, the unheard Onic Agency! Where undercover agents save the world in secret!Bexan felt immensely grateful towards the heroic girl who saved him from the brutal terrorist. After that, he decided to become an agent. Bexan was indebted to Onic so he pledged to give his full service to the said agency. Within 11 years, Bexan trained his ass off to become District 10's Supreme Commander and in order to do that, he has to get a hold of one of the biggest cases in Onic and that is terminating The Camorra Mafia Group.Bexan won't be handling this big time case alone. He will be assigned with a job partner, but wait a minute! Not just any job partner! Bexan becomes partners with a female agent who's a complete sloth. Lilith Divina helps Bexan with his first assignment in terminating the Camorra Mafia group. Bexan finds Lilith uncooperative with a drunken man's soul. Will their first assignment turn into a success? Or will it turn into a complete catastrophe?

Elsie Miller, just an ordinary girl that lived in ordinary life. Her life turned chaos when she accidentally bumped into a little girl that attached to her immediately after the incident.Dexter Anderson, the mafia king that lost his family and it turned him to a cold hearted, ruthless and heartless mafia-broken mafia. The only family left was his niece, Andrea Smith. He devoted all his love to his niece and willing to do anything to create a smile on her face and she was the cause he trampled into Elsie's world."You can't reject me. Once I decided what I want, no one can say no to me and you are included. I will make sure you come to me and say yes to my face. Mark my words.”"Haha. Very funny mister whatever you are. Let's see how you are going to make me say yes!”"Well, challenge accepted.” He cut off the line afterwards without giving me chance to argue back. Arrogant and rude. Now, it convinced me more that this was the right decision ever for rejected his offer.

So there I was, stuck in this dark Victorian mansion for a whole freaking century, thinking I'd never get out. Then, out of nowhere, these two gorgeous girls swoop in and rescue me! I couldn't believe it, and we instantly hit it off. They showed me a whole new world I'd only ever imagined, and I was all about living a normal human life.   But just when I thought things were looking up, this vampire named Vivaldi pops up out of thin air, grinning like a possessed Jack-o'-lantern. I mean, a name like Vivaldi is bound to give you the creeps, right? He claimed I had some ancient first blood running through my veins and demanded that I sign some crazy blood contract with him—the kind of deal that comes with some seriously freaky consequences.   Vivaldi was trying to sell me the idea that this blood contract was his only lifeline, the only way to save his skin from something worse than death. But I wasn't some clueless newborn vamp; I knew better than to just dive into something as serious as a blood contract. Those things come with some heavy consequences, and I wasn't about to sign up for that without a second thought.   The problem was, if I didn't go along with his messed-up plan, he promised to make my friends' lives a living hell—the very people I'd started to care about. I was trapped between a rock and a hard place. If I decided to team up with Vivaldi, I'd be keeping him around, which is far from ideal. But if I refused, my friends and the whole town of Shadowvale would be in serious danger.    It felt like I was caught in this impossible situation, like I was trying to choose between two rotten apples.

Two years ago, Ava Anetha vanished without a word—on the very night she was fated to become Luna. Most believed she was dead. She was betrayed and left to rot while her sister claimed everything that was hers. But fate rewound the clock, giving her a second chance. Ava returned with a vengeance and a dark secret. She was the true heir of the crimson Moon pack, a bloodline tied to ancient magic. Her list is long and every name will bleed. what she didn't plan on was him, Malcolm Hartwell, Alpha of the powerful Nightfang Pack....and the father of her ex mate. His powerful, dominant and dangerously obsessed with her scent. He's everything she should hate, older, cold, untouchable. But he sees through her. The huger for revenge, the rage, and funny enough, he wants it all. He wants her. Now Evelyn must walk the razor's edge between vengeance and something deeper than love, because when the devil himself offers you his hand, the question isn't if you'll take it, it's how long you will last before you beg him to stop.

Perer Ford is the smartest guy in school and at home. He has a weird way of making things go right. It is his final year in senior secondary school and he tries to make everything go perfect before leaving for the university. A funny and exciting diary about his experiences, struggle and life on the edge of adulthood.https://tinyurl.com/y4zt5qnv

Gabrielle "Gabby" Crisostomo will not let some rich guy take advantage of her sister at ang lalong hindi niya matatanggap ay basta na lang nitong iwan ang kanyang ate kaya naman she decided to take the matter in her own hands, she decided to kidnap the bastard who ruined her sister's life pero paano kung maling tao pala ang nakidnap niya at makakayanan ba niya gantihan siya nito sa paraan na ginawa niya dito, and Jayden Andrada will not hesitate to get back to the woman that made him lose a very important business deal just because of a stupid mistaken identity.

Plot; They are two very unlikely people who happen to meet each other. Noah is a football quarterback and his first championships are coming up in a couple weeks, so are the tests to determine whether or not they’re passing to the next grade. Sophie is an A+ Goody two shoes who has been wanting to be an author when she gets out of school. Noah comes to Sophie on the low for help after he finds out his scholarship is riding on how well his grades do. Sophie goes through a bit of a hardship and she finds the person she least expects at her side before anyone else. Noah isn't just the ‘popular cute boy’ of the school, there’s more to him than meets the eye.

"You, my dear, will be going to help us to decide that. You will pick a king." "Say what now?" "I'm not going to repeat it since I know that you have heard me." "Fine! You want me to decide?! Nate!" I pointed to prince Nathaniel, if I remember correctly. He was slightly taken aback and a confused expression was replaced. "Do you want to be a king?" "I...uh...Yes?" He said. Unsure of his answer. It made me wonder if the expression on my face had forced him to say yes. "Good. Then you'll be the king. "What!? But that's not how you decide it!" PRINCE Ace said. "Fine! You're all kings. In fact, we ALL can be kings!!" **** She's Rosalie Amber Stan. A simple teenage girl, who made a wish to have a more adventurous life, was a victim of an abduction by the Fae queen to a different realm. She was brought to a castle with 5 supernatural princes, who are fighting for the throne. The queen gave her a task to be the one to choose the future heir to their kingdom. Little did she know that the queen only wanted one thing from her and the princes: Romance. Between a sparkly wizard, a rude obnoxious elf, a flirty vampire, and a couple of twin trouble making wolf princes; Is there really a right choice? And why is there a wolf spirit, who suddenly awakened upon sensing her arrival, kept stalking her? A romantic-comedy in 'another world' with a quirky-temperamental female heroine learning the culture of this new fantasy world.

DISCONTINUED INDEFINITELY ********************************** WARNING CONTAINS SEXUAL CONTENT ********************************** Ashlee is a trouble maker who has been expelled so many times that she drove her parents to the edge of insanity. They had run out of ideas on how to get her to straighten up so they decided to send her to an all boys private school where her roommate and all of her classmates are, you guessed it, boys! Once she gets used to the nonstop flirting and staring she makes friends with a number of the guys and quickly realizes that half of them have crushes on her. Will being put here be a punishment or a hidden blessing, only time and her unique experience will tell in the end. ********************************** "You're a girl." He stated coldly glaring at me "You're a boy." I countered raising one eyebrow ********************************** "Ugh stop staring." I stated before adding "Where can I take a shower?" "Um well the showers here are down the hall but they're not private at all." Matt stated "We could guard the door for you so no guys go in." Max added "Awwwww thanks guys, should I strip in front of the whole school now or when you let them in the showers while I'm naked?" I replied sarcastically "Awe Ashlee we wouldn't do that." Matt said "But I wouldn't mind a Private showing." Max added with a wink