Why Do I Hate Repeating Myself Novels & Stories

I hate myself . I can't speak for myself in front of my classmates and that's why I hate myself. "Fine,I will..." "I will do it "I interrupted ,my eyes still on the floor. "What did you say ?"Mia asked ,more tauntingly , folding her arms. "I .... will do it " I reapeated and raised my head up. "Hey ,are you stupid ?,you can't do that "Fred whispered to me. "Mind your business "I replied him.

She doesn't have a single thought in her head, except for these words that kept repeating themselves over and over in her mind:Why did life hate me so much? "Life doesn't hate you, you are the one hating yourself for not letting go. The moment you let go, you will be free" Her subconscious mind said. "It's not easy, no matter how I try to forget it comes back to me. If there is anything I want so much it's to be free from this pain that refuses to go. I want to wake up every morning and smile that I am alive, not sad because of my damn past." She mumbled, trying so hard not to drop a tear.

I may have wanted something from him before, but not now. I place another carefully placed cut and sigh in satisfaction as the pain eases the emptiness and numbness like it has so many times before. It’s my escape when I can’t have my music or books. I like pain that I inflict because I can control it. I don't mind what Killians has been doing to me lately. I hated the first few times with him, but after the third time I’ve been enjoying myself and I hate it. I hate it! I hate him! I hate my father! Most of all I hate myself. I repeat that mantra while placing small cuts.

Stacy's POV I knew saying I hated him wouldn't stop him. I knew it would probably make things worse. But I was too angry to care. Too furious to think straight. "I hate you," I repeated, my voice shaking. "I hate what you've done. I hate—"

16 : 00pm After a long day of fighting my bad habits , fighting my demons and improving in every way possible. I shake my head in disappointment as I hit a set back. I get this intense urge to throw random items against the wall , but I refrain from doing so. Over the years , I have picked up many bad habits. I wish I had the guts to tell you ladies and gentlemen – I really wish I could , however my disgust and my embarrassment stops me from doing so.

I stuttered tears slipping again with the hiccups. I tried to reason with my mind, but once you share pieces of yourself, once you give your heart, you can’t go back, the love remains but the difference is now it is not the only emotion instead it fills you with hate, regret, bitterness and sorrow and the worst of all the question that itches your skin the most is why me? What did I do to deserve this? I think that question was there in every hurt person's mind overthinking. It's crazy there, is no bigger critique than your mind

I mentally face-palmed. I was not sure what was the actual point that she was trying to make but I was pretty sure that Rowan might have come to the conclusion that I was a fucking stalker who was obsessed with him. Funny enough, I remember saying things that sort of comes back to bite me in the butt, all the time. Sigh. I seriously need to get rid of all these habits of mine. I keep telling myself all of this but I go back to doing stupid things again and again.

Why the fucking hell does he keep saying that? I hate it. Wait, why do I even hate it? I don't know, I just know it hurts a lot and he keeps making me feel so unworthy or something the more he keeps saying that, but well, I am just going to brush the topic aside. And that is only because I am curious to see what he wants to do.

HUNTER And I waited, seconds hours minutes, waiting for him to open that door Hating myself with evey passing minute, the guilt was too much to carry, cause even I wouldn’t forgive myself, I was angry at him for not hitting me, slapping the fuck out of me, hating my existence, I hate him but hated me more Then the phone rang… I don’t understand the sentence the first time they say it. I nod while they’re talking, because that’s what people do when someone is talking to them. I even say “okay” at one point. I think I ask them to repeat themselves, not because I didn’t hear them, but because the words don’t arrange themselves into meaning.

“I just wanted to tell you how sorry I was how sorry I am” “You already told me that at the hospital, why repeat yourself?” “Because I feel bad about it. I feel bad about how I treated you” “Is that all you’d like to say? I think I’ll take my leave now” “Wait please, wait” “Why are you repeating your words?” “I'm nervous, I'm scared, I'm afraid that my apology won't get through to you.” “You should have thought about that before you did what you did” “Did you think about what I said the other day?”