Aku dan "Sahabatku"

“Where are you hiding it?! Where is the money!! Bring out all your savings, you ungrateful child!” My mother screamed at the top of her lungs as she rummaged through my things frantically.

“Please stop this!” I cried out in frustration falling to my knees.

‘When will all of this ever stop?’ I thought to myself disheartened as I sobbed silently.

It has become a norm for me to walk in on my mother ransacking my room for things she didn't put in it.

“Don’t be so selfish now child, I know it's in here somewhere… bring it out!! bring them all out!” She screeched maniacally clearly irritated by my silence… she grabbed a handful of my hair and pulled me across the room, a pang of pain bolted from my scalp to my brain like my head was been severed in half.

These were the moments I wished to have never been born…

“Mom, you know I’m saving towards college, besides we just have some months to pay back and I’m sure by then I’ll have something tangible to give,” I tried negotiating with her knowing fully well that all my talk will fall on deaf ears.

“Can’t you be a normal child this once and do as I say?”

“But you know if I can get into college there are a lot more chances of me paying up our debts faster,” I explained.

“You selfish little brat!! You think I don’t know you secretly want to escape and leave me with your sister to rot in this shithole,” she yelled furiously.

“Mom You know I’d never do that and besides if you'd allow Kara take up some side jobs too it would help out a great deal,” I suggested under my breath hoping to get her to reason with me.

But who am I kidding, the twisted look on her face says it all.

“If you want to be stingy and wicked at the same time, fine. But don’t you ever speak about my daughter doing some stupid menial job,” she gritted out through clenched teeth.

“Mom what’s going on in here,” Kara asked, striding in with her long slender legs.

We were so similar in a lot of aspects almost identical if i dare say, but with a character like hers I started to doubt if we were even related, this person couldn't possibly be my sister.

“What else can you think of my dear?” My mom spat out swiftly rolling her eyes at me.

“Ava’s troubling you again?” She asked in the tiniest and most innocent voice you've ever heard.

“She’s being an asshole and refusing to bring out some money to pay off the debts.”

“Ava why don’t you just bring out some money to pay off the debt? I’m sure you don’t want them coming over here to search the house?,” she added, folding her hands together and standing beside her mom, I can't even tell if she's my mom anymore.

I look up at kara slowly and froze when she noticed the new clothes and shoes she had on and only then did I notice the new things mother had on too… something doesn't feel right

“mom … d-did you… give them, the money… for this month?” I let out through intervals of sharp breaths now sheathing with anger.

“Don’t ask me silly questions,” she replied dismissively, feeling angry I'd asked her such a question.

“Please tell me you’ve been paying it up like we planned to do monthly.” I half yelled out now livid from the scenario unfolding before me.

“How were you both able to afford the shoes and clothes you are putting on?!” I asked completely livid now, about to loose my shit at any second.

“Well from what I’ve gathered, your college savings should be able to cover up for seven months and we used the money you gave for three months,” she spewed out audaciously and unapologetically too.

‘The nerve of this bitch’

“Please tell me I misheard… no, I'm probably dreaming for sure” I soliloquised in disbelief, this can't possibly be happening.

“I’ve helped you out with the calculations, so all you need to do now is to pay off about six months with your savings then we can use the rest of the money to live by until you start earning again.” she blurted out nonchalantly.

“Can you hear yourself?’’ I scoffed out in disbelief… this woman has completely lost her mind

‘‘How could you?… both of you used the loanshark's money on new clothes when you know who we’re dealing with?” I muttered harshly, losing all the strength I had in me.

“Well now you know how serious it is, so pay it off quickly.” She retorted ever so nonchalantly

“Please leave me alone, I need to prepare for work,” I said calmly, not having the strength to fight or argue any longer.

“Make sure to do the dishes before leaving,” she pointed out and walked out with Kara unapologetically not even the slightest sign of remorse in sight… who even are these people, are we even related?

“You still haven’t ironed my clothes yet,” Kara chipped in.

Who would ever believe that I’d become a slave in my own home?

Taking in a deep breath, I decide to brush off whatever happened in here this morning like it never happened.

★

“You're awfully late today, you've never been late even just for a few minutes Ava.. are you good?” Jason asked, a bit concerned about me.

“I’m fine, just overslept,” I brushed him off.

Doing the dishes and ironing the clothes didn’t leave me much time to hurry over in time, not after all that craziness from earlier in the morning.

“Are you sure? You look rather pale to me, is something wrong?” He asked placing his palm on my forehead and his in an attempt to check my temperature.

“I’m fine okay, just a little bit tired.”

It was hard acting like nothing happened. But the thought of one person caring about me should have helped a bit but it didn’t, I was stuck thinking of what to do.

I’m deeply hurt to say the least and honestly very surprised that they would spend all that money I worked so hard for to clear our debts with on shoes and fancy clothes when they know how vicious and notorious those loansharks are.

I’ve worked my butt off since I turned 18 to pay off the debts my dad owes for two years. Luckily for me a glimpse of hope showed up, I had taken up multiple job offers in order to save up some cash for college and use the rest as settlement for the monthly draft we drew out with Mr Montey.

And now those two years have been flushed right down the drain thanks to my mother and sister I'm back to square one.

Now tell me, how do I explain to anyone I have been sabotaged by my own mother and sister whom I'm also trying to free from this debt, talk about a fucked up family.

There was no one I could take a loan from, and it doesn't even make sense taking a loan to pay up a pending loan… all roads lead to hell at this point

But there's Jason…

Jason's the only friend I knew and talked to, we met here at the coffee shop where we work.

He’s an orphan and I wouldn’t want to come off as burdensome even though I know he’ll love to help out.

I've racked my brain all day and I'm at my limit, I can't take it any longer.

Failing to hold back the tears that has been threatening to fall all day, I let them all out in a free fall.

“I’m done for today, please help me sign out and I’ll see you tomorrow,” I excused myself refusing to look at anyone already at my limit.

I just walked out of the coffee house heading to the lonely alley way that whispered my name.

‘The streets feel more welcoming than my own home,’ I whisper to myself as I clenched my purse taking short strides dreading going back to that melancholically empty house.

I ignored how eerily quiet the whole house was when I got in and headed straight to my room.

It was the only thing we had left, the only little memory of dad I had left…