REFLECTION

Astrid’s POV

My husband and mate Killian, who is also the Alpha of the Silvermoon Pack, left the assembly and went somewhere with his ex-girlfriend leaving me behind.

As the Pack’s Luna, I dutifully prepared for our annual pack assembly, but he nearly ruined it because he couldn’t wait to spend time alone with Giselle.

Giselle was Killian’s ex-girlfriend. She was his one true love, a woman who is better in many ways than me. Giselle and Killian were in love with each other. Even after Killian found out that we were mates and marked me as his mate and Luna, Killian only had Giselle in his heart.

As his mate, it kills me to know that my mate who is supposed to love and cherish me is in love with someone else. Killian had always reminded me that he felt nothing for me.

In the years that we were married, he treated me as nothing more than his mere subordinate.

Aside from being a Luna, I am also Killian’s right-hand man in the military. I am in charge of the Pack training and I always work alongside Killian like I was his secretary.

With my fighting skills and abilities, no one in this Pack can take me down in a fight. With this, I earned my position in the military. It is also one of the reasons why Killian’s father was so happy to find out that I was his son’s mate.

If it wasn’t for Killian’s father, Killian would have rejected me as his mate. I would have lived miserably, watching Killian being happy with someone else and forming his own family.

I know that Killian never wanted me as a mate. I know that I do not have a place in his heart. I thought everything would be fine as long as I fulfilled my duties as his Luna and right-hand man, but things only got worse ever since Giselle came back.

Two months ago, Giselle came back out of nowhere. Ever since then, Killian had become more cold and indifferent towards me. He also started to neglect his duties because of her which added to my workload.

This cannot continue any longer especially now that I’m pregnant. With what has been happening recently, I know I can't keep this a secret any longer.

My palms grew clammy as I approached Killian’s office. I hadn’t seen him the whole night and searching his office was the first thing that I could think of.

Doubts and insecurities filled my mind as I went nearer and nearer to my destination. I couldn’t get off my mind that Killian and Giselle had been spending time together for a long time.

Laughter entered my ears when I finally reached Killian’s office in the distance. My brows wrinkled in confusion when I realized that the laughs were coming from his office.

I stared at Killian’s office in silence. Its light poured out of the windows, but I could only see their shadows inside because of the translucent blinds that were blocking my view.

I pursed my lips as I took hesitant steps to get closer. I thought they would be talking about work, but I didn’t expect that they would be having fun together inside.

In the years that I have been together with Killian, I have never heard him laugh so sweetly as he is doing now with Giselle.

I felt a pang of jealousy inside my chest because Giselle could easily make Killian laugh while I couldn't even bring a smile to his face even if I'm his mate and Luna.

I always knew that Killian didn’t love me. I always knew that he loved Giselle. With that knowledge, I couldn’t help but feel insecure as I heard them having fun inside.

It hurts inside my heart to know this, and it hurts even more because there's no way for me to change it. I've never held a special spot in Killian's heart, but he's the only one who's ever had a place in mine.

His cold treatment towards me is a constant reminder that he sees me as nothing but a pestilence for him. If only I wasn’t his mate, he wouldn’t be forced to have me out of his will.

As I stood there at the door listening to their sweet waves of laughter, I leaned into the door hoping to hear a glimpse of the conversation that they were having.

I am Killian's mate and Luna, but I don't even have the right to go inside and find out what my mate is talking about with his ex-girlfriend.

Unable to hear their conversation, I grew more curious and my insecurities got the best of me.

When their laughter suddenly died down, I knew I had to go in there and know what was happening.

I know Killian still has feelings for Giselle, which has been obvious ever since she came back. As his mate, I couldn’t help but feel anxious that he was alone in a room with that woman.

Trouble filled my heart as different thoughts entered my head. Jealousy got the best of me and before I could think clearly, I pushed Killian’s door open, stopping the two from what they were doing.

“Astrid! Didn’t I tell you to always knock? How many times do I have to tell you that you are only allowed to enter if I tell you to enter?!” Killian yelled at me angrily after I caught him sitting close to Giselle.

I gripped the hem of my oversized shirt tightly as I stared at their closeness.

Killian’s muscular build shields Giselle’s petite frame. Killian looked so relaxed and comfortable with Giselle. He is even sitting on the same couch as her.

Although I am his mate, I have never been that close to him. He had always been so formal with me, always treating me as his subordinate.

I glanced at Giselle and looked over her outfit. She doesn't look like she came here to discuss work.

She’s wearing little clothes with too much skin exposed. Anyone would think that Giselle came to seduce Killian.

She’s wearing a silk nightgown with her unblemished porcelain skin exposed.

I gulped as I stared at her perfect body. Her skin is clear and radiant with a flawless complexion. Just by looking at her skin, you could say it is soft and supple because her skin looks smooth as polished porcelain.

Is this why Killian likes her?

I clenched my jaw as I compared her body to mine.

As a Pack Warrior, I had to train every day under the sun this left me with tan and dry skin, unlike Giselle’s smooth porcelain skin. I also have some scars on my body as a result of the fights that I had. Aside from that, I also have callouses on my hands which I got from training and fighting with weapons. You could say that my body is tarnished, unlike Giselle’s unblemished body.

Besides, Giselle is a woman. Although I am also a woman, I do not act like one. I even had to pretend to act ladylike when I was in public, but that comes naturally for Giselle.

I am unruly and nowhere near what is expected from a woman. Now, I no longer wonder why Killian doesn’t like me and why it was hard for him to forget his first love.

“What do you want?!” Killian demanded as they finally separated from each other. Giselle starts to wear her clothes and Killian puts on his shirt.

I blinked as I was taken out of my reverie. I came here because I wanted to say that I’m pregnant, but based on the circumstances this is the worst time to tell him that.

“I-I just have something to report,” I stuttered.

“A report? Did you interrupt us for a useless report? Couldn’t that wait until tomorrow?” Killian questioned angrily.

I swallowed hard after receiving his furious response. “This is urgent,” I lied with a straight face.

Giselle stood up. “This must be something important. I’m going to leave,” Giselle spoke softly as she stood up to leave.

As an unofficial member of the pack, this is a private matter that she couldn’t pry into.

Giselle carried the tray of food that they had together for dinner with her and purposely knocked over me making her drop to the floor. In her fall, she dropped the tray that she was holding, sending the dishes flying. Broken shards splattered across the room upon her fall.

I winced when one of the shards slashed my skin when it splattered towards me

“Giselle!” Killian shouted worriedly as he turned to help her while I was left on my own, checking the sliced wound on my leg.

I watched as Killian searched over Giselle’s body for any signs of wounds or injuries, but she was perfectly fine. It was I who got hurt but Killian couldn’t care less about me.

Giselle glared at me when this was entirely her fault. There was a lot of space on the other side of the room, but she purposefully bumped into me.

“I know you don’t like me, Astrid, but you can’t just hurt me if you want. It’s not my fault that Killian likes me. Why don’t you look at yourself in the mirror? Do you think that any man would fall for you?” Giselle hurls insults at me when I didn’t even do anything against her.

“Astrid! What are you a four-year-old?” Killian rebukes me without even asking me for an explanation. “Is this how a Luna should act? This kind of attitude is not fit for a Luna,” he added.

I swallowed hard when my identity as a Luna was also questioned. I did everything for this Pack. As a Luna, I never slacked on my duties. I am his mate, therefore I am the righteous Luna of this Pack. How could he question my credibility as the Luna?

“What would you do if Giselle gets a miscarriage? I will never forgive you if you kill our child,” Killian hissed angrily.

My eyes went wide at this newfound information. “S-She’s pregnant?” I stammered.

I was speechless for the next few seconds as the news of Giselle’s pregnancy hit me like a freight train.

A lump formed inside my throat as I locked gazes with Killian. I waited for him to say something, to defend himself for the immoral thing that he had done, but all I received from him was his anger. He doesn’t even feel any remorse for cheating on me and impregnating a different woman.

Instead, he dared to glower over me with his nose flaring angrily.

My heart twitched slightly inside of me as I locked gazes with him. Am I really that insignificant to him? Haven’t he thought of how this news is going to hurt me?

“You apologize to her!” Killian demanded, making my jaw fall open.

I let out an air of disbelief when I heard what he had just demanded me to do, but he just looked at me with a straight face. He is really serious about this.

I blinked at his shamelessness. Isn’t it enough that he impregnated his mistress without them feeling guilty about it? Does he have to force me to apologize to his mistress when I didn’t do anything wrong in the first place?

He is looking down on me like I was nothing. Has he forgotten who I am?

My blood boiled as I looked at Giselle who was carrying my mate’s child.

She knew that Killian was my mate and that we already marked each other, but she just couldn’t keep her legs close. She stole my man without feeling guilty about it, but I am forced to apologize for something that isn’t even my fault.

If there is anyone who had to say sorry, it was them. They must apologize for betraying me.