1000 Funny Ways To Die

There are monsters in this world. And they used to be us. Now it's time to euthanize to survive in a hospice where Emily, a woman haunted by her past, only wants to do her job and be the best mother possible. Post-infection Chicago. Christmas. Inside The Hospice, Emily and her fellow nurses do their rounds. Here, men and women live out their final days in comfort, segregated from society, and are then humanely terminated before fate turns them into marrow-craving monsters known as ‘Smilers.’ Outside these imposing walls, rabid protesters swarm with signs, caught up in the heat of their hatred. Emily, a woman haunted by her past, only wants to do her job and be the best mother possible. But in a world where mortality means nothing, where guns are drawn in fear and nobody seems safe anymore – at what cost will this pursuit come? And through it all, the soon to be dead remain silent, ever smiling. Such is their curse. It won't be long before that snow-speckled ground will be salted by blood. ©️ Crystal Lake Publishing

At my wedding to a billionaire heir, Malcom Blair, I leaned down and kissed a filthy, ragged man begging by the entrance, right there in front of everyone. While the guests were still too stunned to react, I grabbed Christine Wagner, Malcom's cousin and my maid of honor, by the hair and slapped her across the face three dozen times in a row. Everyone thought I had lost my mind and tried to have me locked in a psychiatric hospital. Inside, I spent the whole night popping champagne and celebrating. In my last life, not long after the wedding, Christine, a pediatric nurse, set fire to a children's hospital. Many kids died on the spot. The police and the victims' families surrounded my house, screaming that I was the arsonist. I stood there, completely confused, while Malcom pulled out surveillance footage and pointed the finger at me. "You used to complain all the time that taking care of sick kids was worse than dealing with a dog, that it'd be better if they just died and got it over with. I never thought you'd actually be this cruel!" The families lost control. They doused me in gasoline and burned me alive…

Story 1: "Make a wish," He asked her. "I want to die." She replied without hesitation. He was the only one who could save her, and she was the only one who could see him and bring him back to life. Story 2: after so many years, a message arrived for a reunion of the whole batch. everyone was excited except those two hearts, twisted and anxious. But little did they know it was going to be a new beginning for the two of them as they would finally fall in love all over again...

The Ashford family opposed my relationship with Everett Ashford. To separate us, they drugged him, and his fiancée ended up pregnant with twins. Everett threatened suicide if I left him. He begged me to stay, swearing he would never see them again. He even told me the pregnancy had been terminated. Three years later, I spotted him at a parent-teacher conference. Enraged, I kept the twins after school and, on their way home, they were kidnapped. Everett blamed me for everything. To force me to reveal where the twins were, he strapped my mother onto a high tower ride. However, my mother had a heart condition. I sobbed that I did not know anything. Everett screamed at me. "I've been good enough to you! Why the hell would you go after those kids? Tell me where they are right now or I swear I'll push your mother off this thing!" He shoved her toward the platform's edge. The safety harness hung loose on her frail body. I had no idea where the twins were. Everett shoved my mother off anyway. Just then, someone found the twins. Everett walked away without looking back, leaving my mother dying of a heart attack. While he rushed to pick up his children, I stood in a hospital room pulling a white sheet over my mother's face. That was the moment I finally stopped loving him.

When my son asked me about his father while crying once again, I pointed at the television. Samuel Shaw, who had just made it into the top three of the wealth rankings, was being interviewed. He said he had achieved fame and success, and the person he hated most was his childhood sweetheart and ex-wife. “She abandoned me when I was gravely ill, all for the sake of money. But it was that very betrayal that pushed me to rise from the ashes in my darkest hour.” The reporters grew excited and suggested contacting me on the spot. "She must be filled with regret, begging Mr. Shaw to take her back!" My phone rang right then. I answered and immediately asked for money. "Samuel, my son is sick. Could you lend me sixty thousand dollars?" He abruptly hung up the phone and said with a cold laugh, "Knowing she's living so miserably gives me peace of mind." Looking at the kidney failure report in my hand, I silently wept. Six years ago, I secretly donated one of my kidneys to Samuel. Now, his son was suffering from the same disease and didn't have much time left.

After I fail in my mission, I am about to be erased by the system and will disappear from this world completely. In the final 24 hours before I am erased, I agree to donate a kidney to my younger brother, Zachary Durham. My wife, Judith Sanford, hugs me excitedly and says she will not divorce me anymore. When Zachary plagiarizes my design, I take the blame and admit that I am the one who copied it. My parents nod in satisfaction, saying I have finally become sensible. Finally, I become the good husband and son they always wanted. But when they see my lifeless body sometime later, they all lose their minds.

Even though I've been with Eric Blackclaw, the heir to the Alpha title, for three years, he's still unwilling to mark me. Later, he falls in love at first sight with my stepsister, Layla Talbot. Thus, he begins courting her in a grand manner in the pack. This time, I no longer throw a tantrum, nor do I question Eric like I did before. Instead, I just burn all the gifts he's given me and rip my gown for our marking ceremony into shreds. On Eric's birthday, I leave Northpine Woods on my own. Before I board the private jet bound for another continent, Eric sends me a message via the mind-link. "Avril, why aren't you here yet? Everyone's waiting for you." I don't respond to Eric at all. This time, I just sever my mind-link with Eric. What he doesn't know is that I've already accepted Alpha Marcus Howler's mating proposal to me half a month ago. Once the private jet lands in the new territory located in Frosthill Mountains, Marcus and I will become mates with the Moon Goddess as our witness.

Set up to break her bond with her Alpha mate after the Lycan King passed a decree that no alpha was allowed to reject or break off their bonds with their mates unless the mates did it themselves, Ellie Fowler could hardly believe her luck when by some strange fate, she's immediately bonded to the Lycan King himself, who now thinks she's nothing but a disloyal mate and worse, an Omega. Lycan King, Archer Daalmans, has a year to find his mate to prevent him from losing his strength or worse, dying, and he is determined to find her only for that reason. However, he is disappointed to find his mate is a dirty Omega who doesn't know her place, and he wants nothing to do with her, but he can't seem to keep his eyes off her or stop himself from protecting her.

He woke up with no memory, no name, no past… only a system in his mind telling him his fate: conquer the hearts of eight men… or lose everything. Naïve, silly, and utterly unprepared, Finn had no choice but to obey. Each man was more than a challenge... they were his past lovers, the very ones he had betrayed and abandoned, and now, he had to win their hearts again. There was Niam, wild, reckless, and infuriatingly irresistible—the first to challenge Finn, and the one who taught him that love could sting as sharply as it could thrill. Then Franklin, the perfect golden prince, hiding a playboy heart behind a flawless smile. Lucian, the older, calm, untouchable stepfather figure. Ethan, the cold professor, untouchable and strict. Aiden, the brilliant scientist. Lucas, the cunning actor, schemer, and manipulator…. Mason, the isolated genius doctor, haunted by solitude, whose heart melted for a patient unafraid to cry, play, and demand love on his terms. And finally, Theo, the dying tycoon, preparing to leave the world, only to find a reason to fight for life, desire, and passion… in the arms of the boy who promised him love in return. Bound to these eight men, Finn had to navigate lust, desire, heartbreak, and the pain of past betrayals. Every touch, every glance, every kiss was both a weapon and a lifeline. Could he win back the hearts he once broke, or would he lose himself—and them—forever? From system-driven missions to torrid nights of passion, from angst to redemption, Finn’s journey is one of love, loss, and a harem that refuses to forgive—or let go. One thing was certain: to survive, to regain his life, and maybe even happiness… he would have to conquer not just their hearts but his own.

In a world where the gods of legend have become actual fact, a few misnomers from another planet seek to simply live their lives in peace. If you could choose one word from the dictionary, one that simply defines you to the core of your soul, what would you say your definition is?