Barney Himym Quotes Novels & Stories

Seeing that he was about to hit me, I ducked to the side, urging, "Hold up, Jerry. I know you're desperate, but hold your horses and listen to me." Jerry swung a punch, shouting, "The hell with listening to you!" I quickly yelled, "It was your daughter who seduced me, Jerry!"

I fell unconscious for minutes that seemed like eternity but Asher didn't care about me, but his baby who his mistress was carrying. “Barren” The word still echoed in my mind even when I tried to shake it off, he saw me as someone who's barren, he called me a BARREN WOMAN. I had never known Asher was so desperate to get a child. We never talked about it the hard way, we were never bothered by it but I was wrong, I was only being kept in the dark.

"Mr. Callen, you spent millions of dollars creating this one-of-a-kind 'love'." He paused, then casually tossed one of the broken watch parts into a nearby trash bin. "Now, it's worth nothing, just like your love." Andrew's words struck Jerome silent. His face first drained of color, then flared red, and he didn't even notice Cassidy tugging frantically at his sleeve. "You bastard!" Kylie appeared beside us and slapped Jerome hard across the face. "What have you done?" The livestream chat exploded instantly. "Holy crap! Noelle's mother-in-law is so cool! That slap is the best moment of the year!"

"You're being ridiculous. He doesn't have a monster cock." "I know, but if he did..." She glanced up and shrugged. "It would be miserable for him too, you know? Remember that kid in high school, Barry? He was so damn nerdy, but his dick was huge. He couldn't get laid to save his life, and he was so depressed about it." "That's just gross, and if I remember correctly… he was too." I got up and dropped the rest of my ice cream in the trash. "Even though it's gross, it still sucks." She stood up and put her phone in her back pocket. "Imagine not being able to have sex because your body was deformed."

She yelled. "You look more cute when angry , my name is Mark and I was wondering if we could be friends ? " Mark said and gave her a charming smile that girls couldn't resist. "Sure , so you can f**k around with me ? Do I look dumb ? I know Guys like you , you get close to a girl get under her panties , just so you know I have a big brother he will beat you up to a pulp if I told him about you so stay away from me brainless fool " Barbie said plainly and resumed walking.

"Like that bartender's face. He's too good-looking. Something ought to be done about him." “Shut up, I never drool.” I slurped my diet coke on the rocks. “Anyway, he probably thinks I’m some weird psycho bitch now. And, man, you’re the one who’s drooling at the bartender." “Can’t I just appreciate art?” She was always witty with her responses. “I’m just appreciating the god-perfected beauty. He’s not even a part of this conversation.” Carrie winked at me. “But I still feel like showing up on the bar stool and baring my soul to him.”

“Damn, you played yourself like a damn clown! You sold sh*t to someone, and now you want it back just because it’s treasure? Where’s your self-respect, man?” “Haven’t you been humiliated enough? Was shooting yourself in the foot not enough? Or do you wanna shoot the other foot too? Is that why you’re causing a ruckus now?” “Man, if I were in his shoes, I’d just crawl into bed and cry myself to sleep. I wouldn’t even admit this blunder!” The crowd’s jeers and accusations made Barney get even more flustered. But what was a little humiliation compared to a treasure worth hundreds of thousands?!

Cam is slinking away, but won’t get far if Jim decides to go after him. “Even in the scrubs.” I give him a half-smile and sigh. “I’m trying not to go off on a rant right now, but I cannot stand guys like that. There are other reasons for going to a bar, you know. Not everyone wants to hook up with you, Mr. I’m-Doing-Business-in-Newport.” Jim laughs. “That was his line?” “It was one I remember. It’s pretty bad, huh?” I readjust my purse on my shoulder. “I think this is a sign from the universe I’m not meant to be at a bar tonight. I just want to go home.”

He's supposed to be humble, caring, straight forward and funny. Barry is matured, selfless, simple, loving, crazy..he's..I don't know..just..so perfect!

“I survived, but barely,I may have screamed at a cadaver. Don’t judge.” Dean grunted. “You probably deserved it.” Troy rolled his eyes. “Cadavers don’t scream back. You’re safe.” Becky leaned forward. “I think it’s hilarious that Barry treats embalming like an emotional trauma.” “Trauma is trauma,” Barry muttered, taking a slow sip of his coffee.