Batman Happy Birthday Funny

By our sixth year of marriage, Derrick hadn't touched me in three months. Said he was swamped at work. Always tired. After everything, I still believed him. Then on my birthday, I caught his friend talking in Garmenian—a language Derrick didn't think I understood. "You cut off the side piece yet? You were with her nonstop. Surprised you didn't drop dead. Your wife cool with that?" Derrick let out a smoke ring. "Haven't touched Audrey in months. Sabrina's insane in bed—I'm not over her yet. Sucks she got pregnant. Audrey doesn't want kids, so I gave Sabrina some cash. She'll have the baby overseas." My hands curled into fists. Silent tears streamed down my face. He glanced over, nervous. "What's wrong?" I smiled. "The cake you made is amazing. I'm really touched." It was sweet—but when you understand Garmenian, all you taste is betrayal.

After twenty-five years of trying to win over Gus Harding, I failed and died by his hand. But he didn't know that. He kept threatening, demanding I show myself immediately. The real heiress slapped him hard. "Genevieve is dead, and you didn't even care enough to see her one last time." Gus scoffed, claiming it was just another one of my tricks. Only when he saw my cold, lifeless body did he finally understand. I was gone for good. And this time, it drove him mad.

This is a story of two close friends (Courtney and Judy) and the odds that meet them as soon as Courtney turns 18. They hope for a bright future together but have no clue on things that are yet to unfold in their lives.

October 31st 2022, ten students will be invited to a Halloween Party. They thought that it would be fun. What they didn't know is that, it's the last party they could ever have. Dress up with your scariest Halloween costume, because you are invited to the deadliest Halloween party of all.

Jace Storme is the most popular guy in school, while Maxxie Gray is the superhero-obsessed nerd....who just so happens to be obsessed with Jace. After Maxxie drops a pair of underwear, Jace says those fated words: "I like your Batman underwear." The two discover the ups and downs of young love, navigating identity, friends, and family while trying to keep their relationship alive.

On my 16th birthday, I treat myself to the most delicious cake I can find. On that day, before I can even take a bite, my parents, who are always at odds with each other, sign their divorce papers right in front of me. So, on my wedding day, I tell my wife, Keira Jarrett, "If you ever want a divorce, just get me a birthday cake." She hugs me tightly and promises me."Don't worry. 'Birthday' won't even be a word in our home anymore." Seven years later, on Keira's birthday, her assistant, Jackson Price, throws her a surprise party. She slaps him across his handsome, gentle face and kicks him out of Jarrett Group. That day, I am convinced I have chosen the right woman for life. But three months later, on my birthday, I find out the supposedly fired Jackson has been promoted to Keira's personal secretary. He personally delivers a custom-made birthday cake to me. I call Keira to demand an explanation, but her voice on the other end is cold and distant. "Jack meant well. Don't be a spoilsport." I freeze for a moment, then hang up. It turns out my parents are right all along. The only way a birthday cake tastes right is when it's served with divorce papers.

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

I lived in this world full of lies and shit. And those people who know nothing but to judge me. They were busy talking about other people's shits and not minding their own life. Who are they? Did they give me money to feed me and my son? I am not a criminal to treat them like this. They don’t even know me and my story, but the way they looked at me, it was like they have known me for years. Their eyes send daggers at me whenever they see me passing by across the street. Their scrutinizing looks made me feel like I’m just an insect that they wanted me to get rid of. What did I do to them to treat me like I killed someone? Am I a bad person? I was just trying to give my son a good life. I know it may be dirty in their eyes, but at least I did not beg and ask for money from them. I've been living in this unfortunate world since I got fooled by love. And to keep my son, I need to work in this kind of profession. Yes, I worked in a place that they thought was the dirtiest job… But I am still proud that I am Felicity "Happy" Mondragon, and will do my best to give my child everything he needs. Find out why a loving and optimistic woman turned out to be a stripper. Will she find someone who could give her way out of that cruel world?

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

Her heart began to beat heavily. She was fascinated by the man. Awareness flooded through her, as did a sudden need to brush her hair. Dammit, why had she put on this stupid bum short and singlet today. She wondered what he would look like with that shirt off. She swallowed and tried to look away. Fantasies like that would get her nowhere. "Hi" he said. And for a few seconds Emma didn't realize he was speaking to her. She blushed when she lifted an eye brow questioningly. "Oh hello" "Urmm...name's Daniel. Nice to meet you" "it's nice to meet you too.. I'm Emma" -------------------------------- Emma Green has totally given up on relationships and happy ever after. Not because she doesn't think it's amazing to have someone, mind you, but because she simply doesn't believe in love. She's been there and done that, and she's not doing it again. But when she meets Daniel Rohan, she starts to think that maybe, just maybe falling in love again might not be all that bad.... -------------------------------- Take control.. Feel the rush... Explore your fantasies Step into stories of provocative romance where sexual fantasies come true. Let your inhibitions run wild.