Contoh Teks Anekdot Stand Up Comedy

“Please… f*ck me. I’m burning.” Those weren’t the words Aurora Blaire ever thought she’d say—especially not on the night of her engagement party. But one reckless, forbidden night shattered everything she believed about herself. A twenty-two-year-old virgin raised to be perfect, Aurora suddenly wakes up in the wrong bed—with a stranger who isn't her fiancé. Her innocence, her reputation, her future—one night threatens it all. And watching her fall apart? A ruthless, possessive billionaire with eyes dark enough to swallow sin. He saw her trembling, her tears, and something inside him snapped. He didn’t want to use her—he wanted to protect her. To shield her from the wicked world. To claim her. To make her his. He’s willing to burn the world to keep her safe… But the only person he can’t protect her from is… himself.

Xander Martin is a man with a reputation to uphold. He's handsome, rich, young, smart and... Cassanova. It's no secret that he likes to spend time with rich women. In fact, the whole town knew he didn't want to sleep with the same girl twice. But everything changed when he accidentally had sex with a girl. Frustrated that the girl is not the hired girl he thought he was, Xander accuses her of being a spy sent by his business rival to destroy him. So, is the accusation true? Did Xander succeed in finding the girl? The most important final question, who exactly is that woman?

One reckless night. One unexpected baby. Two men who might be the father.Darcy never saw it coming..literally. A cryptic pregnancy leaves her blindsided when she wakes up in a hospital bed with a newborn in her arms. But the real shock? Her daughter's father could be one of two men. Cassian Dempsey; the cocky, troublemaking bad boy from the wrong side of town. Elias Mercer; the ruthless, untouchable golden boy with a fortune to his name. Both are her brother's best friends. Both were never supposed to touch her. And when they find out the truth, neither is willing to let go. But the biggest scandal of all? The DNA test comes back with an impossible result... They're both the father. Now, caught between secrets, temptation, and two men who refuse to back down, Darcy is in deeper than she ever imagined. Because some betrayals can't be undone. And some men won't take no for an answer.

I slept with my boyfriend’s twin brother, a Mafia don. One wild, drunk night, I gave in to him at his family’s masquerade ball, only to discover too late that the man who held me was not Nikolai my loving boyfriend. It was his twin Kieran Petrov, the feared don of the NY Mafia. A cruel man with blood on his hands, now I hold a devastating secret. I’m pregnant and I have no clue which of the brothers is the father. So when I decide to come clean to Nikolai and get closure before I leave the city, I find out a grave secret. Nikolai had been cheating on me with my best friend for years. So I run away, leaving it all behind and going into hiding. However, the Petrov family has enemies, does that want the only heir of the family dead. But Kieran tracks me down, he brings me back and present me with a deal I can’t refuse. Marry him and receive protection or stay where I am and die. I should hate him, in fact I do, he had known I was his brother’s girlfriend and still went ahead to make love to me. But I have no choice, I signed the contract and become Kieran’s contract wife. It was just for protection, nothing else, at least that’s what I think

Matapos malaman ni Mallory Natividad na ang kapatid at boyfriend niya ay may relasyon at suportado pa ito ng mga magulang niya ay naisipan niyang pumunta sa isang bar sa pag-asang makakalimutan niya ang nakita at ilabas lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman niya. Pero nagkakamali siya dahil kahit ilang baso na ang nainom niya ay hindi pa rin siya nakakalimot. Naglasing siya nang naglasing hanggang sa may lumapit sa kaniya na lalaki. Sa sobrang kalasingan niya ay hindi na siya umangal nang inaya siya nito papunta sa kung saan. May ideya na siya sa kung anong mangyayari sa kanilang dalawa pero sa halip na matakot siya ay para bang gusto niya rin ito. Ang gabi nila ay parehong nagtapos sa isang mainit at masarap nang magkasama sa iisang kama. Kinabukasan, nang makita niya ang lalaking nakasiping niya ay hindi siya makapaniwala nang nakilala niya ito. Ito ay si Cargorios Mertimor, kilala bilang isa sa pinakabata at pinakamayaman sa buong mundo— at higit sa lahat ay kilala bilang isang womanizer. Hindi niya alam kung ano ang gagawin niya kaya dali-dali na lang siyang umalis nang hindi nagigising ang lalaki. Ilang linggo lang ang nakalipas ay hindi niya inaasahan na magbubunga pala ang nangyari sa kanila at mas lalong hindi niya aakalain na magtatapong muli ang landas nila. Inaakala niyang magiging maayos lang ang lahat nang sumama siya kay Cargorios, pero hindi niya aakalain na ito na pala ang simula ng pagkagulo ng buhay niya. Hindi niya inaasahan ang natuklasan niyang plano ni Cargorios na nagpawasak sa kaniyang puso. Dahil doon ay kailangan niyang mamili. Pipiliin niya ba ang sarili niyang kasiyahan, o ang kapakanan ng kaniyang anak na nasa kaniyang sinapupunan?

One night. One mistake. Now I’m working for the man who can never know it was me. I never saw his face. He never asked for my name. But for one stolen night, I was his obsession. Until morning came—and I vanished like a secret. Now I’m Emery Scott, just another assistant at Valenrose Beauty Group… And he’s Jason Hale—my new CEO. Cold. Powerful. And still haunted by the mystery woman who touched him like no one else ever has. He doesn’t recognize me. But he remembers the curve of a birthmark. The scent of my skin. And he’s hunting for her… for me. I thought I could hide in plain sight. Until he starts looking at me like I belong to him. Until I realize I’m not the only one keeping secrets. Because Jason Hale doesn’t just want the woman from that night— He wants everything. And the deeper he falls… The more dangerous it becomes to stay.

Warning: 18+ Only contains explicit scenes and adult languages featuring hard-core taboo erotica, young adults and sex with brother's best friends. This is an erotica collection containing stories of steamy, filthy romances. If you like reading naughty stories then this book is for you, get ready to feel the ultimate erotic excitement **** “Bet this is the biggest cock you’ve ever had, isn’t it?” She couldn’t talk, could only brace for me to fuck into her repeatedly. “OMG,” I cursed. “You’re so tight and hot, and you have the wettest pussy I’ve ever felt.” “Frankie!” she cried out. “It hurts so good.” Yeah, it fucking did. I pulled out and pushed back in. “You little thing… with this tight, tiny pussy that’s justmadefor her big brother’s cock.” I couldn't control myself as I started thrusting in and out, fucking her too hard, too brutal, no doubt. But like my good girl, Saffa lay there and took it all. I made my best friend’s sister take every single inch of me. I wanted to go slow so this would last all fucking night, but I was too far gone. No amount of jerking off could ever tame my dark, twisted desire for my best friend’s little sister, and now that I was finally getting the real thing, I’d never want anything else. I thrusted deep into her, stretching her tiny cunt out even more, knowing that when I came, I was going to fill her up, then suck out my cum and make her drink it out of my mouth. Saffa cried out for more, begging me to fuck her harder. And I gave my best friend's little sister what she wanted.

Lily at age fifteen wanted to be so many things, but a werewolf was never part of it. Actually, she never thought of it either, because this story isn't about Lily at fifteen, nor is it about any damn werewolves. This story is about 23-year-old Lily Hills, waking up to the dead body of her one-night stand in a motel. The same man, Damien Kalashnikov, was to tie the knot the next morning, and Lily was slated to handle the magazine publishing the glamorous wedding events. Lily who just wanted an adventurous night for once in her life, was now accused of murdering a ruthless Russian Mafia boss. Just as all hope seems lost, Dimitri, Damien's identical twin brother and infamous "Beekeeper," saves her, he proposes a shocking solution: a contract marriage, with conditions for both parties to meet. The wedding, initially intended for Damien and his bride, will proceed as planned – with Lily as the new bride. As Lily and Dimitri navigate their complicated relationship, he commissions her to write his biography. With each passing day, secrets unfold, and shocking truths surface. Their bond deepens, but danger lurks. With a surprise pregnancy raising stakes, it seemed Damien left a souvenir. A Russian Roulette began. Albeit, a typical Russian will say to you: Когда река молчит, шепчет ли она секреты рыбам? (When the river's voice is silent, does it whisper secrets to the fish?) Even in silence, hidden truths may be shared, and secrets can be revealed in unexpected ways. Will Lily, wife to the Omertà Mafia Don ‘The Beekeeper’ eventually find out what happened that night?

To save her sick mother and Carter for her younger brother after the death of their father . She had no choice than to work at a brothel as a prostitute. As much as she hates the job she had no choice and would do anything to make her life better. But life has another plan for her . She met a popular billionaire who wanted her to work for him as his baby's nanny . While working for the billionaire she found out she's fallen in love with him beyond control. What Will happen when the billionaire's ex_wife would do anything to get her killed . Will she escape from the danger ahead .

Six years ago, Cynthia left Lucien and divorced him while pregnant with their child. Lucien's words, "If I ever meet you again, you'll know WHAT HELL IS!" hung over her like a curse, lingering in the years like a nightmare. Six years later, an unexpected turn of events throws Cynthia into a thrilling one-night stand. And the man involved turns out to be none other than Lucien, the one who had once cursed her so cruelly! Once again, fate has cruelly bound them together. Lucien looks at Cynthia with eyes full of hatred, but beneath that fury, there seems to be something deeper—emotions too complex for him to even name. Is it love or hate? The line has long since blurred. Cynthia is a bundle of nerves, desperately trying to hide the existence of her child. But with Lucien's probing gaze fixed on her, how long can she keep up the charade? What twists and turns will their story take from here?