Dark Humor Dad Jokes

"You belong to me Ralia . I would make you love me, bend you to my will, but you will never have my heart, to me, you would remain a weapon to be used against the moon goddess." Ralia is a pure innocent, dedicated to the moon goddess since birth. She is not allowed to think any bad thoughts, or do any bad thing, otherwise her family would lose their fortune. When she is eighteen, her sister out of spite dresses her up like a whore and sends her to Lord Lesley, the dark Alpha, so he can seduce her, and destroy the family's fortune. Alpha Lesley, thinking that she is nothing but a whore seduces her. They are found by the rest of the family who demand they mate officially. Ralia is already in love with the dark Alpha, but Lesley only agrees to mate her in order to use her to revenge against the moon goddess.

One week to pay off the debt of her dead father or become a sex slave for a powerful mafia gang? Andrea was just a young college dropout looking after herself when her father passed away. But unknown to her, her father was indebted to a mafia gang and even signed her off to them if she couldn't pay. She gets threats of being taken away if she can't meet up. Andrea turned to her billionaire boyfriend to seek help but he profusely dumped her. She went to the club to unwind with her best friend and lost herself, getting into a one night stand with a hot older stranger. The day the mafia gang were to take her because she couldn't meet the deadline, the older man halted them. “ Be my submissive Andrea and I will pay off your debts” He offered. Little did she know that he was her ex boyfriend's father? And she was getting herself into an entangled web of deception, secret and lies?

(18+) Dark werewolf romanceHe is out for revenge…Eight years ago, Nikolai Slade, alpha of the Selene pack was a kind and loyal ruler, his gentle Luna by his side until disaster struck. Ambushed, he watched in defeat as an enemy pack raped and killed his wife and unborn child. Now grief stricken and burning with rage, Nikolai hungers for blood, biding his time for he won’t rest until he seeks his revenge. The outcast…Born without a wolf, sweet, innocent and virginal Liyah Verbeck is shunned and maltreated by her pack. When she is kidnapped by a gorgeous man, with silent, cold eyes of silver, she believes that her worries are over, but unknown to her, they were only just beginning.A dark tale of two shattered souls, bound together by vengeance, reunited in love.

A well-planned day will be the way to cross their path crucially. August 13, 2014, was the marked day Lavender Visha Grey will meet her new psychologist, Dr. Black, to maintain her lovely reputation she will need a therapist to help her heal her darkest past she had been hiding since she escaped. Growing up in an orphanage as skinny and stinky as she was, she has been the target of big fat bullies since she arrived in the shelter. The poor little Lavender tends to stay alone in the empty room, as usual after their meal she will run up to the third floor with her little smile and the idea she will be alone again. But she didn’t expect that the moment she stepped into the room her nightmares would be made and hunt her for the rest of her life. She never expected that the mighty psychologist would find the key to open her soul again out of curiosity. With his charming smile and dark look. Will her walls be shaken with the hot psychologist? Or she will buy any preference book to learn how to seduce a great seducer. Even she can entice many as she can. She needs to have the one she can’t unless she tells her story for the first time. On their way to getting into each other, they will be burned with their fiery desire with their way through. One heart that seeks revenge for her loved one, and one heart that intends to show his love but in a wrong way. “Manipulation is not always needed I know,” “I want peace but I need to avenge, yes,”

"First ever She-Alpha divorced by a cheating husband, almost had a one-night stand with her ex's dad, the Lycan King! Can it get more dramatic?" Grace's world was turned upside down when her mate chose another, shattering their bond and marking her as the first divorced She-Alpha in werewolf history. Now, she navigates the rough tides of single life, nearly landing in the arms of her ex-husband's dad, the handsome and enigmatic Lycan King, on her 30th birthday! Imagine this: a relaxed lunch with the Lycan King interrupted by her scornful ex flaunting his new mate. His snide words still echo, "We're not getting back together even if you beg my father to talk to me." Buckle up for a wild ride as the Lycan King, steely and furious, retorts, "Son. Come meet your mom." Intrigue. Drama. Passion. Grace's journey has it all. Can she rise above her trials and find her path to love and acceptance in this thrilling saga of a woman redefining her destiny?

Sa pagpasok ni Lewis Perez sa condo ng kanyang nobyo, nakita niya na isang babae ang umiindayog sa ibabaw ng lalaking pinakmamahal niya. Labis na nasaktan ang dalaga, dahilan upang sumama siya sa kaibigan sa isang bar at doon magpakalasing, not knowing what will happen to her. Dala ng kalasingan, pumasok si Lewis sa kuwarto ng isang lalaking CEO na noon ay umupa ng isang babae upang magbigay ng aliw sa kanya. At sa hindi inaasahang pagkakataon, binigay ni Lewis ang kanyang katawan sa lalaking ito, isang bagay na makapagpapabago sa kanyang buhay. One next morning, nalaman niya sa kanyang ama na umuwi na mula sa ibang bansa ang kanyang uncle at dahil fresh graduate si Lewis, naisipan ng kanyang ama na ipasok ito sa kompanya ng kanyang tito na si Vladimir Grayson upang magkaroon ng experience. Ngunit hindi niya akalain na ibang experience pala ang matututunan ni Lewis. Sa pagdating ni Lewis sa opisina ni Vlad, nagulantang ang dalaga, dahil ang lalaking nakasama niya sa kama at ang tito na ngayon ay kaharap niya ay iisa...

" Your father?? Bryan is your father?? " Ava asked, stunned. Jayden nodded, his face expressionless " Yeah " Bryan stared between his son and his own girlfriend, who happened to be his son's ex. And he wanted her back, he knew his son too well and he could see that Jayden wanted Ava back. Jayden turned to his father " Dad, is she your girlfriend? " He asked, desperately hoping it wasn't true but his hope was dashed when his father nodded. " Sh*t " Came out of his mouth as he hit his fist on the wall in suppressed anger. He turned to his father " She's my girlfriend, Dad " he declared. " Ex girlfriend " Ava corrected, her nose flaring in anger.

I am a first-time writer so please enjoy... Ciara isn't your average werewolf; she's a chemically and magically altered therianthrope or a multi-shifter. Wolf, bear, owl, mouse and fox. Ever since she was found in a laboratory when she was a child by the Alpha of her pack, her shifter abilities have prevented her from getting what she truly wants... Freedom and love. When the Summer Moon Festival is held at her pack, Ciara's world is turned upside down by the people who supposedly care about her and when she finds her mate, things start taking a turn. However, he isn't just any werewolf, he is the future Alpha King. The Alpha of War. Alpha Mars doesn't want a mate, but his parents are forcing him to take a chosen mate. He is determined to leave the Summer Moon Festival without a mate. However, when he meets a corky, she-wolf with a sassy attitude, he can't stay away from her. But both Ciara and Alpha Mars intend to secretly reject the other... eventually... What happens when the mate bond is stronger than their own individual plans? What will happen when Ciara's past comes back? Will Alpha Mars accept Ciara's secrets?

At her graduation ceremony, Claire White eagerly awaited Adrian to finally make their relationship public. But to her horror, she watched as he got down on one knee and proposed to Nicole, the esteemed daughter of a powerful Alpha. Heartbroken, Claire drowned her sorrows at a bar, where she met a dangerously alluring man, Theo. Sparks flew between them, but just before they crossed the line, fate intervened desperate phone call about her father's sudden illness pulled her back to reality. With her father's life on the line and medical bills piling up, Adrian offered financial help on the condition that she became his mistress. Furious, Claire refused, only to find herself blacklisted and unable to secure a job. Just when she was at her lowest, an unexpected opportunity arose a high-paying position as the secretary to the CEO of a prestigious company. But upon stepping into her new workplace, she discovered a shocking truth her new boss was Theo. And worse still, he was Adrian' s father.

A Dark Addictive Romance 🫦 30 days. One contract. His rules. Maddison Summers never planned to sell herself… until heartbreak and bills left her no choice. “I lost everything in one day… my place at school, my dad’s studio, my house and my boyfriend. Now I’m in a dying billionaire’s penthouse. Corian Van Halen. Billionaire. Possessive. Trouble in every language. One look in his green eyes and I know…. I’m in big trouble. He’s rich enough to make the rules. Reckless enough to break me. I should run. But when the devil calls me his, running feels impossible. And then I find out the worst part… He’s not just my client. He’s the man who owns my dream job. And worse… he’s my ex-boyfriend’s father. Yeah. The same ex who suddenly wants me back. Three years later, I crash into him again… with a little boy who has his eyes. Now Corian wants his son. His woman. His second chance. But I’m not the same girl I used to be. If he wants my heart this time… he’s gonna have to fight for it.”