Dark Humor Jokes No Limits

“Sure, sir,” I came closer to him, he offered me his arm. I was conscious not to touch his skin because if I’d done, it would have caused butterflies in my stomach, I had never been this close to any celebrity and my heart raced crazily.  I concentrated on the button rather than my feelings, I could feel Brandon’s eyes scanning me, did he notice my hesitation? , I was sweaty. Did I shiver? “Done,” I told him and looked up to meet his gaze. My heart was out of my hand, can say, was almost in my throat, I could feel the aura changing between us,  And before I could step back, Brandon said, “I owe you now,”   **** Jenna Maxwell escaped her abusive husband knowing that he will find her anytime soon. Leaving Liam behind in Pasadena and hiding in LA was her only option so she tried her luck without giving it a second thought but one didn't know that real danger was waiting for her to obey his obsession. A night where she found herself harassed after she passed out in a private event. She didn't know that man was once she had a crush on Brandon Grande. A formidable highest-paid model and known celebrity. He is all that it takes to be a gentleman, He is perfect in front of the camera world, and opposite in the real world. He has an addiction. The moment he saw her was the moment he marked Jenna as next, he craved her. When he wishes something to happen, it happens, either by hook or crook.

It’s Monday and my first day of my new school. I drive my car around to where everyone else is parked, so I find myself a parking spot. Then I find the front office and go in and get my schedule. My first class is math, so I walk into the room and I’m the first one in there so I walk up to the teacher and hand him my paper to sign that I have to take back to the front office this afternoon. “Hello Miss. Billie Green I’m Mrs. Smart. It’s very nice to meet you.” The math teacher says, then sings the paper. You can go find yourself a set. I would try to find one in the front on the left-hand side. The kids pretty much already have the back full.” She tells me, and really it’s okay. I kinda like the front anyway. I make my way to a seat that looks vacant and sit down. Kids start piling in about five minutes later. And walking to their seats, there’s a tiny little girl that comes and seats down behind me. She introduces herself as Shaylee Apple. “Hello Shaylee Apple I’m Billie Green.” I tell her and hold my hand out to shake hers. I turn back around in my seat about the same time as a tall guy that has dirty blonde hair cut into spikes all over, ash gray eyes, so gray I can see the color all the way in my seat. He’s wearing a tight fitted gray shirt, and blue jeans. He has a very handsome face, but then he looks at me and instantly I see hatred in his eyes. What the heck, he doesn’t even know me. .

Georgia Pearce is a typical teenage girl, anxious to find her place in the world when she encounters Hayden Ryder, the enigmatic new student at her school. She is captivated by his beauty and aura despite his fierce temper. At first, he seems to despise her but is then inexplicably drawn to her too. What Georgia doesn’t know is that Hayden has a chilling secret, a beast that lurks within him. Ignoring the signs, she falls deeper in love, unaware of the danger she faces. Mysterious deaths begin plaguing her town as Hayden’s behavior grows more unpredictable. Could he be the one to blame for all the killings? Georgia’s need to protect herself is overwhelmed by her instinct to stay by his side. She refuses to give up on him, believing that her love will be enough to tame the monster inside Hayden. Is she just naïve, or more capable of protecting herself than anyone realizes? Does Georgia’s love for Hayden prevent her from seeing a simple truth, that loving someone like Hayden walks hand in hand with her doom?

Liliana doesn't know who she was. All she knew was that her stepmother hated her and treated her so badly and she left the house in search of green pastures until she met the arrogant billionaire that saved her yet she hates him for what he usually does to her, she doesn't know the reason why he hated her. Yes Damon, a billionaire, saw a lady panting for breath without knowing that she was to the lady he had been searching for, for two years. He just helped her. When he saw her face clearly, the past started coming back by bike to him. He had one baby in his mind, Revenge. He has the power to take revenge to his fullest but was only stopped by one thing, her innocent face. The person he had loved all his life regardless of their family rift. He had to leave her after he deflowered her to search for the mystery and answer to his questions about the cause of their family rift which led to him finding Liliana that day with blood-stained over her in his father’s house. Will he unravel the past and get to the root of the matter?. Will he recover his love when a drug Lord is also in love with her?. The suspense can only be found and uprooted when he comes face to face with his rival. Will he survive it all and forgive his love and recover from the pain and anguish they have been through or let fate decides?.

The Dark Below is a steam-punk/fantasy world filled with the darkness that rests beneath a wavering tide. Generations ago, Gods from the depths below rose from the black seas and in doing so, caused a great flood that would have destroyed all of humanity if it was not for the ingenuity of survival. Living among The Dark Below has come to pass, but now four warriors must come together in hopes of forging a brighter future.

***Warning: Mature Audience Only*** No Safe Word is a sinful collection of short stories where control is the ultimate game, and surrender is inevitable. From ruthless CEOs to dangerous strangers and forbidden rivals, every short stories teases the edge of pleasure. Each story pulses with obsession, domination and a passion that burns through every rule… just when you think you’ve had enough, it pulls you deeper into a world where there is no safe word. Dare to play? There’s no turning back once you say yes.

"Could you ever forgive that someone who ruined your past?" Diane is trapped in the past she can't even remember. How can she live her life again once she figures out what really happened? [You can listen to my international radio interview in the U.K. here: https://soundcloud.com/ian-johnson-75/friday-31st-october-fridays-afternoon-evening-late-show-1029pm-1208am-uk-time-part-4 (29:00 to 33:00)]

To save her father’s life, Bianca agrees to a dangerous deal. She must work for Anna Adams—a powerful and feared mafia queen with no mercy for weakness. Anna controls casinos, nightclubs, and the criminal world. Everyone fears her. Bianca becomes her property—a servant, a tool, and slowly, something far more dangerous. Because Bianca is the only person who makes Anna feel human again. But Anna’s world is full of enemies. Corrupt police, hidden traitors, and jealous past lovers are always watching. Lies pile up. Trust becomes risky. And feelings grow where they shouldn’t. What starts as a deal turns into something neither of them planned—half love, half war. And in the mafia world, loving the wrong person can cost you everything.

WARNING: Some scenes may not suitable for some readers so be open minded when reading this story. This story contains graphic depictions of violence, sexuality, strong language, and/or other mature themes. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. [No portrayer intended] No soft copies allowed

**** BOOK 2 OF THE ASSASSIN SERIES**** Following the death of her mother at the hands of the hunter mob, Lizzy has her world turned upside down. As if finding out she was really the daughter of Alpha Lucas of the Dark Moon pack wasn't enough, her mate is a new kind of monster. Can they forge a path ahead and make their bond work, or will her father's old enemies crush them before they ever had a chance?