Deer Jokes Novels & Stories

“I always thought the ‘deer in headlights’ thing was a bit exaggerated, but I see it fits you perfectly!” “I’m not…uhm…talkative.” “Oh, I’ve noticed. Like, either a deer or…what’s those little skinny dogs that shiver all the time?” “…A…whippet?” “Yeah! Those! You’re like one of those, but human.” I stare at him, utterly unamused, and he snickers like he’s just told the funniest joke. “But man, there’s clearly something in you. Otherwise you wouldn’t have agreed to this… Though, if you’re so timid, why join the drama club? I just can’t see you on stage in front of people…ah, no offense.”

"The second I stepped out of the cabin I knew you were there." "I guess I wasn't so slick after all." DJ pouted and they both laughed again. "I thought I was playing the ninja." "You did a good job." Louis encouraged, but DJ wouldn't buy that. He did horribly. "Show me photos of turtles." DJ requested and Louis stared at him confused. "Really?" "Yeah, that's my favorite animal," DJ replied shyly. "Dude, that's like nature's D student!" Louis blurted out and DJ laughed harder. It was soothing listening to the sound of his laughter and Louis knew the boy was on his way to getting better.

Okay, this shit got to stop, maybe I should try a joke or something? “Hello triple Ds” I say chuckling awkwardly and they just stand there not knowing what to say. “you know, because the names of the three of you starts with a D” I explain my bad joke. “Yah we got it” Dylan says with a fake chuckle, okay, maybe that joke can still be saved. “I’m a double D myself” I say laughing liking my own joke and all their eyes instantly go to my breasts. I choke in my laughter when Derek lets out an angry growl and I sink further inside my hoodie while Dylan starts counting the specks of dust on the floor and Dean find the light fixtures very interesting all of a sudden.

Come on, I'll take three shots as punishment—consider it a toast to you and Macy! Todd stood to the side, his expression shifting between anger and panic. He stared at me intently, as if I were the cheating wife, the disgust in his eyes practically spilling over. Looking at the bunch of fools in front of me, I couldn't even be bothered to be angry. I turned my head and glanced at Terrence. He'd worked under Dad for 20 years. There was no way he'd be able to tolerate anyone insulting me like this. He suddenly raised his hand, about to slap Miguel across the face.

“I didn’t even help him.” Ruhan clapped his hands. “That’s great, Jai!” Raka gave a small smile. “I hope you don’t kill all of them. They coexist with the Drat Deers in the east.” Jai frowned. “Don’t wolves eat deers?” Even though Jai didn’t know what Drat Deers are, he knew that there’s a deer in the previous world and it’s listed as herbivore. Raka nodded. “Yes. But if the deer reproduce three times than normal, then something has to be done, right?”

“You’re welcome, little deer.” Little deer. That nickname freezes me to the spot, and Justin bursts out laughing again. “Yeah, if your eyes get any wider, I’d be worried they’ll pop right out of your head,” Justin teases, his grin infuriating. “Fuck you both,” I mutter, storming back to the bathroom, but the pit in my stomach only deepens.

exclaimed Sekora. “Alright sorry.” Said D2 sitting up. “You’re not being serious.” Said Sekora sitting cross legged on the floor and taking some deep breaths. “But I am, you don’t have to have a cow about it.” Said Dejon in a singsong like voice. “You know what, get out.” Said Sekora with a stern look, pointing to the door. “You know what, I’m going to play with the birds, they are a lot nicer than you and by the way we’re still doing our training session, whether you like it or not.” Said Dejon sticking out her tongue and walking out the door.

I chatted at length, without realizing that the porridge had run out of my story at height. I am the deer, once I am free, I will scratch their bodies. Even if they are healthy, I don't care. Oh yeah, deer only have horns. I was a deer will head them using my horns. I will head them back to that dark cave and let the fierce dragon eat them. My evil thoughts always appear like this—poor deer. "Very clever answer, my wife. Unfortunately, in the real world, it is reversed." Gerald said, patting my head.

The human grinned and shook his head. “Sorry, I think you need to repeat that, I don’t speak dog.” He teased, and Lance growled playfully, dipping low and shaking his hind end, tail wagging. The human looked delighted. It was a tense morning’s work, disposing of the deer and having to survey the farm, and they both needed something to lighten the mood. Brooding wouldn’t keep either of them any safer.

His hand is forbidding me from erupting in boisterous laughter, and the other is holding me still. As my mouth is covered, we share a knowing look, acknowledging the hilarity in this. "Who the hell is named Hewey or Dewey. What the fuck?," he giggles. It just makes me laugh harder, but sensing a scream, he covers it tightly. I tend to scream when something is truly funny, and this is. Once Greg announced them, I pictured this vintage cartoon with ducks that had the same names. I swear the only thing keeping me quiet is his hand. Why is this so funny?