F Up Jokes

Everybody is different. May it be with the way you look, your sexual orientation or your beliefs and culture. Tori Kingstein has always thought of herself as someone who’s different. She never liked boys. Yes, she's gay. Tori then was sent to her mum’s old school, an all-girls boarding school in hopes of her not getting herself a boyfriend at a young age. But jokes on her parents, cause she actually swings the other way around. And little did she know that entering Whistler High School for Girls would put her on a mission with other girls, like her who aren’t white, to end the discrimination, inequality, too much use of white privileges and the use of wealth and power to stay on top by some students, especially by the school's student council officers. After knowing this, Tori is set on finishing her mum's past role in this group—and that is to destroy the unfair treatment of the school and the student council to students who what they call “aren’t white and as rich as them”, but Tori has a secret. It’s just that... She might have a tiny bit of crush on the student council's president who's no other than Amelia Harriet Williams. What could go wrong, right?

Fresh from a business trip, my husband swept me into his arms and pulled me toward the bathroom for a passionate shared bath. As our lips met in a dizzying kiss, I noticed something odd out of the corner of my eye: the toilet lid was down. Seven years ago, after reading an online article claiming that men urinating while standing could splash bacteria onto the seat, he insisted we always keep the lid up for hygiene's sake. In all our years of marriage, it had never been lowered until now. A chill ran through me. The bathroom was pristine, not a stray hair in sight. But then I noticed the shower's water temperature was set five degrees higher than the 98.6°F he always preferred. Men preferred cooler water, and women warmer. In an instant, I realized that Nick Doyle had betrayed me.

Mia Nova is sold to the devil to clear her fathers debt. Luca Barone, known in whispered fear as Diavolo, doesn’t just collect money, he also collects souls. Luca expects to meet a broken Mia who will plead for her life with tears and vivid fear. Instead he meets a petty thief who fears nothing. She smiles when he threatens to sell her to men, and makes jokes about her breast size not being enough for these men. In Luca’s world, the biggest currency is fear, but it seems Mia is bankrupt. When she steps into Pandemonium, his secret lair where powerful men are undone, she becomes the queen of the night, raking in five hundred million dollars in her first night. They make a second deal. The freedom of her soul costs six billion dollars in the six months of her gracing the golden chair every night. A kiss seals the deal. That same kiss changes everything between them. He becomes possessive, and she wants to surrender to him, but the ghost of the woman who graced the chair before her, returns with a fire that is set to burn everything down. Mia must decide between running from the Devil who owns her, or staying with the man who no longer wants to.

At dinner, Tiffany White grabs my fiance's phone and spends 100 thousand dollars on a designer bag. She even sticks her tongue at me. "Come on, Meredith. You're loaded. You won't mind such a small amount, right? Shawn and I share everything. His money is my money," she says. Everyone at the table waits for me to lose my temper or smile and let it slide like a saint. Instead, I calmly take out a voice recorder and my laptop from my bag and adjust my gold-rimmed glasses. "100 thousand meets the threshold for criminal filing. Since you said you two share everything, I have to ask—is this embezzlement or an illegal transfer tied to an improper personal relationship? "Oh, and what you just said about 'his money is my money'? I recorded that. According to the supplemental clauses in our prenup and the company bylaws, I'm officially initiating an asset-freezing order against Shawn Harrison." I turn to Tiffany. "Enjoy your free meals in prison, Ms. White." Shawn is livid. "It was just a joke, Meredith. Is it really necessary to ruin me over this?" I hit the "enter" key. "Sorry. In my book, there are no jokes—only bad debt."

He smirked, knowing he was on the winning side. "So it's a done deal for three months?" He raised his eyebrows, putting his hand forth for a handshake. I looked at the long fingers and perfectly aligned nails and then at his patient face. Sighing to myself I my own hand into his and ignored the tingles that flowed through every nerve as his fingers curled around my hand and shook it lightly. "Yeah three months." "Goodnight then." He winked, removing his hand from mine and turned to walk away. "Hey wait!" I called out, suddenly remembering something. "You don't have my number." "What makes you think that? I have my ways Smith." And with one last wink I saw him take a turn and disappear from my sight. I let out a long breath, leaning on the nearby wall. Looks like I just made a deal with the Devil. * A sarcastic girl, a cocky guy. Throw in some mystery, murder, filthy jokes, wonderful friends, tons of kisses, secrets, surprises, eye-rolls and a killer on run. And you have got yourself a story never read before. ***So grab a cup of hot chocolate, some chips and a warm blanket and get ready to laugh, cry and bite your lip in anticipation. Enjoy!!

She is a Lady, but she spews profanities like they were made for her. She is what you would call....A F*cking Lady. ....••••••.... Zylith Sanders was a mundane teenager until one-day she was sucked into a wash basin and somehow ridiculously ended up in a feudal world without her beloved games and movies. To make matters worse, she was sold off by slave traders to the horrid Noble house of Ronales as a petty maid. But that was not the end of her worries, Dear Zylith, the feminist had a long struggle ahead of her when she meets the mighty King of this feudal kingdom and becomes his pretend consort. With a king that likes to poke deadly humor at her, and a bamby girl who wanted nothing to do with the ancients. How will the poor teenage feminist cope with only her sarcastic mouth to rely on! Just dive in and read on to find out Zylith Sander's romantic plight.

"She didn't want his heart to protect it, she wanted it to break it." - She wasn't ready for all of the sensations she was feeling all over her body. "And what if you fail just like everyone else?" "My life is for yours to take. I would happily die at your hands," he said and that's when she decided what her answer was going to be. - Amara, a woman who was found mysteriously in the woods, her innocent-looking eyes filled up with tears. She couldn't speak for a few hours but suddenly, she was all over the Lycan King, Nicolas. The same guy who gave her shelter in the pack. "Behave, Amara, you won't like the consequences later," he said. "I don't want to behave, I want to be disciplined by you. F*ck me, daddy."

Untuk menyembuhkan depresi si putri kaya palsu, kekasih masa kecilku yang pernah bersumpah hanya akan menikah denganku, Darryl, diam-diam pergi mendaftarkan pernikahan dengannya. Di belakangnya, aku menyetujui perjodohan keluargaku. Aku menikah dengan pewaris keluarga konglomerat di ibu kota, Vincent, yang diam-diam telah mencintaiku selama bertahun-tahun. Setelah tujuh tahun menikah, dia memanjakanku sepenuh hati. Malam demi malam dia selalu menuntut kemesraan dariku. Bahkan jika aku menginginkan bintang di langit, dia tetap akan berusaha mengambilkannya untukku. Aku sempat mengira, akhirnya aku telah menemukan kebahagiaan. Hingga suatu kali setelah bercinta, aku tidak sengaja mendengar percakapan Vincent dengan sahabatnya. "Avril sudah jadi aktris internasional peraih penghargaan. Kapan kamu mau pisah sama Ariel?" "Toh sama saja harus nikah sama orang yang nggak kucintai, jadi mau sama siapa pun itu nggak ada bedanya. Lagi pula, aku harus jaga Ariel agar dia nggak mengganggu kebahagiaan yang didapatkan Avril dengan susah payah." Aku membuka komputer di ruang kerjanya. Di dalam sebuah folder tersembunyi, tersimpan ratusan ribu foto Avril dan seratus surat cinta yang tak pernah dia kirimkan. Setidak percaya apa pun pada kenyataan, saat ini aku benar-benar sudah harus sadar. Aku membeli sebuah tubuh plastik, lalu merancang sebuah kebakaran besar. Mulai saat ini, entah di langit atau di neraka, aku tak akan pernah bertemu dengannya lagi.

Setelah terlahir kembali, aku memutuskan untuk tidak terobsesi pada teman sejak kecilku, Jacky Halim. Di pesta ulang tahunnya, dia memasang plakat di pintu masuk. Dia menulis namaku di samping logo anjing, dilarang masuk. Jadi, aku sengaja pergi ke Hawai untuk menghindar jauh-jauh darinya. Dia bilang mual dan jijik saat mencium bauku di rumah, jadi aku pun memilih pindah rumah dengan patuh. Setelah itu, dia bilang setelah tamat nanti, dia tidak ingin menghirup udara kota yang sama denganku. Jadi aku cepat-cepat angkat kaki pergi dan tidak pernah kembali lagi. Terakhir, dia bilang keberadaanku gampang membuat wanita idamannya salah paham. Aku menggangguk kepala. Tak lama kemudian, aku pun menemukan pria lain dan mengumumkan hubungan kami. Di kehidupan kali ini, aku selalu membuat keputusan yang berbeda dengan kehidupan sebelumnya. Semua ini hanya karena di kehidupan yang sebelumnya, saat impianku menikah dengan Jacky terwujud, wanita idaman Jacky bunuh diri dengan loncat dari tebing. Dia menuduhku sebagai dalang pembunuhnya. Dia pun mulai menyiksaku, sampai akhirnya aku mati dan mayatku menjadi santapan ikan. Di kehidupan kali ini, aku hanya ingin hidup tenang. Kemudian, saat aku merangkul tangan pacar baruku. Jacky malah mengadang di tengah jalan dengan mata merah padam. “Vivi, kalau kamu ikut denganku sekarang, aku akan memaafkan semua lelucon yang kamu buat.”

“Get the fuck away from her!” Owen shouted his voice heavy with desperation. “She is my Luna.” “No, Alpha.” Damon replied. “She’s mine.” *** Omega Callie always lived a quiet and humble life, with her fantasies of finding a mate one day. When the day finally came, her mate turned out to be none other than the Alpha of her park. Sadly, she was rejected and hurt. Her fate was sealed until Lycan Damon had a reason to visit her park. But with every blessing, comes a curse. Will Callie accept her new life regardless of the circumstances? Would she finally get her revenge? Explore a tale of romance, suspense, treachery, and love. The fascinating novel ‘Prophecy of the Lycan Queen will have you reading until the very last page.