Funny Firefighters Novels & Stories

I bit back a groan, torn between answering the sexy firefighter and praising my super sexy boy toy who was making me feel good right now. "Gin?" Adrian called out my name when another knock came on my window, he stopped moving his mouth and stared up at me. I grabbed a fistful of his hair and yanked it real hard. "Shut up and keep going." The firefighter got tired of waiting and turned around, calling out to his peers. "I need someone here to..." Fuck! That's fucking not necessary. I rolled down the glass a little, making sure the guy wouldn't be able to see Adrian. "Anything I can help with?"

"It's him? He looks decent enough—how can someone this sinister hide in plain sight?" "Young people these days… hurting others over petty relationship drama. Terrifying." A middle-aged woman even spat at my feet, glaring at me with open contempt. "You dare wear that uniform? Firefighters save lives—you take them! You don't deserve to wear that badge!" "Exactly! How did a psychological deviant like you get into the fire department? Didn't learn how to save people, but scheming comes naturally! Take off that uniform and get out—you're disgracing real heroes!"

Joey couldn't even muster a single response, only repeating again and again for the journalists to get lost. As the news of his fake death spread from the live broadcast, the citizens who had specially mourned his passing felt like they had been force-fed a pile of cow dung. Naturally, the ones who had the worst reactions were the firefighters. They were the ones who had mourned his passing the most, yet they had no idea they were just jokes from beginning to end. From the very beginning, the fire had been caused by Joey, who wanted to pin the blame on me.

But they held me back once more, their strength matched only by their resolve. "Your wife will be saved. Some firefighters have gone in to rescue her. Please keep calm, sir. She will be saved," reassured a firefighter, his voice a beacon of hope amidst the chaos that engulfed us. Just then, a deafening explosion ripped through a side of Rob-Glow, sending shockwaves through the air as screams echoed and panicked figures scattered in every direction. As the firefighters continued to push me back, their hands firm and unwavering, I felt helpless frustration welling up inside me. "My wife is in danger!" I cried out once more, my words a plea for understanding, for action, for salvation.

Not suspicious or anything, right? “You are so crazy”. “Hey, it’s friendlier than burning them. Theh should be thanking me that I didn’t take you up on your offer”. “Lol. I bet they are real thankful, yes”. Most of them look like they are about to blow a gasket or 20. And the rest of them look thoroughly embarrassed. I almost feel sorry for them. Almost. Maxim has his eyebrow raised, and is looking at Ath pointedly. To which my crazy ass best friend waves with an innocent smile, like nothing ever happened. The women scurry off to fix themselves. Unfortunately though, they are immediately replaced with the next batch.

Some little shit lit it on fire, probably some punks who don't care about ruining someone's life or work as long as it doesn't affect them. "Mr. Ellensworth," a gentleman says as he approaches all of us at the back of the ambulance. He's a fireman actually, and offers, "Great news, we are going to be able to save your office and half of the shop. I apologize for the other half." Mr. Ellensworth coughs and shakes his head slowly, some tears pouring from his bloodshot eyes. "That is more than I thought I would have. Those flames were huge. Thank you so very much."

Over the crackle of flames and creak of things being consumed and weakened by fire, I heard yelling. “Fuck, we have to go in and get her!” I recognized one of my guards’ voices. “Fuck that, man. I don’t get paid enough to be barbecued. You want to go get her? You go right ahead. I’m outta here,” the other guard said. There was a pause, then the first guard agreed. “Whatever. She’s probably dead already anyway.” I realized then I was on my own. “Oh God.” My third grade happy skit about fire safety did not cover this. What if no one came? What if the firefighters couldn’t get to me?!

She smiles, her face is redder than a tomato, and then she agrees, teasing Kayden and Connor: “Of course I’ll go, it will be a pleasure to meet your girl, Kay. And Connie, I know a lot of girls that would think a stuttering firefighter is cute.” Connor throws the napkin on Kayden and winks at me and Sam, showing his six packs abs built with a lot of exercise and rescues at the Firefighter Department of Portland. “You s… see, y… you think that an… anyone has a s… six pack li… like this, you br… brat?”

, Elliot says, and I nod. "I fucking feel it, and I am going to kill the fucker that did this," I bite through my greeted teeth. "Well, I think he is dead", Ell says, grabbing a foot and throwing it at me. "For fuck sake," I let out as we walk and find more people under the stuff. We help everyone up, and I hear the firefighters arriving next to us.

They could see the smoke even before they turned the corner, hard on the heels of Station 58's big engine and the ladder truck. It billowed up in big black clouds that spread over the rooftops of the buildings lining the street. This was the third major fire in a week, an unusual number, and they had all been on her shifts. If she didn't know better, she'd think someone had a crush on one of the firefighters and wanted to see him at work.