Funny Quotes About Midlife Crisis Novels & Stories

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I outlived the buggers." Memorable Quotes "Scattered showers my ass!" Noah. "I have no problem with you talking to yourself as long as it doesn't turn into an argument" Woody Allen. "If at first you don't succeed try, try again. Then quit. There's no point being a damn fool about it." W.C.Fields. "The one thing that all porn stars have in common is a dread of filming the scenes that don't involve sex" Fanny Lightfoot (Porn Movie Director) "For every human problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

“If I choose the job, I obviously can’t go back to my mom, though?” It took her few seconds before she sighed. “Yeah, it makes sense. Sorry, I got it from p*******t and thought it was a cool quote.” I bite my lip to stop myself from laughing. But failed miserably as she made an eye contact with me. I cracked up to the point she throws the sofa cushion right onto my face. “Shut up.” “It’s a cool quote, though.” “Fuck off.”

He said, standing up. "Why didn't you just take us?” I yelled after him. “You know I'm a terrible driver" he yelled back. I scoffed, smiling. That was true. His favorite quote was, why drive a car when it's not trying to kill you? Only God knows where he read that one from....

He laughs but shuts up. “Ok, listen, while we are on the topic of quotes, I have some funny, sarcastic ones,” he says and opens his phone to read some. “Two wrongs, don’t make a right, take your parents as an example,” I laugh. I can use it on anyone who messes with my friends. “Tell me more,” I urge him. “Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs,” I chuckle.

Evren would sniff them out in no time. “Damn, curse that bastard.” I groaned. “Mid life crisis?” an elderly voice asked. I looked beside me to notice a middle aged woman looking at me, her lips spread into a warm smile. I returned the smile, “That obvious?” ”That, and you just cursed what I would presume is a man aloud. Relationship problems?” I shook my head, reveling at the thought of dating that pompous egoistic bastard, "definitely not.” I scoffed, “My boss is an annoying idiot.”

You couldn’t get a more cliché description of a mid-life crisis, so it’s just as well I have my stable best friend, Cain, to talk me down. I told him once, after too many whiskies, that if I was ten years younger – alright, fifteen years younger – I’d run away with a girl like Moona. We could travel around on some magical gypsy adventure, she and I, in a little wagon working the land and selling sprigs of heather. Cain told me I was a fucking idiot and sent me back to my apartment to sleep off my crazy admission, of course. I took it all back in the morning, but there’s no fooling that guy. He knows me far too well.

“It truly is.” “How many kids do you want? We are getting old.” I looked over at him. He was making faces at Adalynn, making her laugh. “We aren’t old!” “I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m never going to have a mid-life crisis because I have fit any and all crisis in this last year.” “You’re not wrong. That’s why we can have half a dozen kids.” Alec took Adalynn and rolled over so she fell on my stomach. “Get mommy!” Adalynn kept trying to bounce but she was on my tits and that hurt.

Damian’s Pov “Dude go back home already, are you planning to stay here forever?” Aaron says as I walk into the living room. “Yes” I reply and he gasps, sometimes wonder if he still thinks he is 19 not or something. “But why?! I’ve been able to have a proper snack with you around.” He whines and I almost laugh. “I’m having a mid-life crises Aaron, so I’m sure you see how that could be a problem for you?” I ask teasingly making him sigh in frustration.

No matter how difficult it may be to do for me today. It may be challenging. But it's pretty easy to excel in life. I will apologise to myself. I shouldn't begin my life on a negative note. I need to be brave to see life differently. I need to excel. Yes, I need to grow in life. I have grown stronger than who I have been those dead years. Not dead years. Years passed by. I don't very much appreciate the word death or dead in usage. I end my day's note with a new quote: "Maybe there is a super microbe which, if present in large numbers in my body, can make me live forever." I may be right in that. I will explore it today.

(Jace pov) It took Marcus and a few others of my friends a lot of convincing to get me out of the office.. “ Live a little,” Marcus always says. “You’ve got enough money to retire twelve times over. Stop acting like life is a business meeting.” I always laugh at that. My friends always tell me to get loose from time to time and enjoy life at its fullest..and I laugh.