Funny Sexual Jokes

*Warning: Story contains mature 18+ sexual scene so read at your own risk..." "See Ella, you know I am straightforward. So I am telling this directly you should please us both in the bed starting from today. In a simple sense, you have to be our mistress..." When Ella's ex boyfriends break into her apartment and forced her to be their Mistress, her life changed forever.

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course. Hazel was rejected by someone she loved and was told that he would be engaged to her deadly foe. In great despair, she went to a bar and met this handsome guy (Zac). They drank a lot and played games. Under the influence of alcohol, they got married. However when they came back to her senses, they decide to make things right, but it's hard to get a divorce now because she wants to use the dramatic yet genuine marriage to keep her proud in front of her deadly foe. Zac on the other hand was the future heir to one of the richest and prosperous families. Although he was endowed with an otherworldly handsomeness, he was known to be as cold as ice and had a natural dislike for women although they always craved after him like bees to a honey pot. But for some unknown reason, he finds something unique about Hazel which he can’t explain. Perhaps, it were her eyes which were limpid and pure like autumn water and sparkled like azure pools in the morning sunlight… Would it be possible that they fall in love with each other in the future? Take part in this amazing piece, and experience a story filled with various mysteries and incredible twists as she uncovers the mysteries surrounding Zac who decides to hide his identity and tremendous background in order to win her heart genuinely.

Alpha Kane imprisons Amy in his dungeon to soften her up for questioning after her brother, Jake, abducts his sister, Lisa. But she proves stubborn and he enslaves her, hoping this will make her more compliant. Kane is attracted to the dark-haired she-wolf from a rival pack, recently absorbed by his own, even though he has found his Luna and mate, Selene. But Amy is not what she seems, and the Alpha also has a hidden agenda. Working together to right a centuries old wrong, the pair begin to question everything they have been taught to believe. Will pack hierarchy ever be the same again?

Book two of the Alpha's Phoenix mate! Melissa is a simple illiterate human village girl who dreams of going to school and becoming an architectural designer but her dreams get shattered when she is forced to marry a man five times her age. She finds a way to get out of the marriage and with the help of Kaira, goes to a different country where she meets Dean. Dean is the alpha of Black phantom pack who's been waiting to find his mate but after finally finding her, he gets shattered when he realises that she not only is an innocent little girl but also a human who isn't interested in love

“You dare to think of another man in my presence?” The Alpha growled with a burning desire in his eyes. He glowered at Lavinia whose hands were tied. “What does that man have that I don’t? That filthy vampire, you think he’s going to save you?” His hands ran through her bare skin, sending shivers to her spine. “Please, leave me alone,” Lavinia begged in desperation. Tears welled up in her eyes. “Then be mine, Lavinia.” He leaned closer to her. His breath fanned her face. “I’ll make you the happiest woman alive.” Lavinia shook her head. She pursed her lips while watching the man in front of her. He may be a great man with power but her heart longed for someone else. “No. You’re not him… You’re not Sebastian.” "We had an unspoken deal: He gave me warmth, colors, and lies. In return, he asked for my blood when he's thirsty, my body when he's cold and my heart when he's bored. The funny part is, I still think it's quite a bargain." - Lavinia de Llava

Pinagtangkaang patayin ni Griff ang kanyang asawang si Althea upang masolo nito ang kompanya ng babae at makasama na nito ang childhood sweetheart nito na si Britney. Ngunit nang araw na itapon sa bangin ni Griff ang bangkay ni Althea ay sakto namang nagmamanman ang mafia boss na si Rigor at nasaksihan niya ang mga pangyayari. Sinagip ni Rigor si Althea at binigyan ng bagong mukha na kawangis sa mukha ng kanyang yumaong asawa na si Sophia. Subalit habang tumatagal ay may kakaiba na silang nararamdaman para sa isa't-isa. Akala ni Althea ay happy ending na ang kanyang love story sa piling ni Rigor. Hindi niya akalaing may darating palang kontrabida. Si Sophia, ang original na nagmamay-ari ng puso ni Rigor. At ang original na nagmamay-ari ng kanyang hiram na mukha. Talaga bang malas siya pagdating sa pag-ibig? At paano nangyaring nabuhay ang matagal ng patay?

"Annalise, when are you going to learn that what you want doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that I get what I want…” He says as he continues to kiss up my body… Annalise Ethelwulf is a warrior-born werewolf who finds her dream comes true when she finds her mate in the Alpha’s son of her new pack. However life is not all roses when her mate wanders but won’t set her free. After catching her mate in their bed with her little sister Annalise runs away from the sight, finding herself in front of a dance club. After entering a one night stand with who she believes is a stranger in a club results in a pup she thought she would never have. Nicolas Nightmoon is the Alpha of the most powerful pack under the werewolf king’s. After going through the pain of losing his mate he didn’t want the burden of another. However a one night stand with the beautiful Annalise changes his life forever but there’s a problem she is already mated… Did the Moon Goddess get it wrong? Did fate put them on the wrong path? Or did someone set her up? *** Warning read at your own discretion as this story may trigger some readers as it contains sexual and physical abuse, some violence and mature scenes. Please read at own discretion!

A path of sexual exploration! Aastha and her father doesn't fit in a room together as her father goes around sleeping after he cheated on her mother. Life gave a chance and she moved out as she get in a situation where she finds herself pleasuring an old man double than her father's age. While her father, Vikas also fulfill his desire with a young girl he was after since a few months. What would she learn from all this? Would she ever able be to understand her father through the men she sleeps with? What is there in her? Why her father is like the way to show other? He is really that bad! How will Aastha deal with everything that comes her, will she ever be loved?

Willa has been running for as long as she could remember along side her twin brother, West and her mother. Their Mother has always told them that a someone is after them. Life was difficult since their mother trained them to be ready for anything, even her death. Two years after their mom died, the twins luck has finally run out and they are captured but they are shocked to discover that it's their own father and brothers they've been running from. Now reunited, will the twins finally find happiness and family or will they end up being destroyed by their family's dark secret? With everyone hiding secrets, what is the truth? What is safe? The twins have only ever believed in their motto, Chaos not cash, maim not murder and each other. Can they trust anyone else and more importantly, should they?

As the attempts at her resurrection have come to fail time and time again, Karmina's power continues to return to her, thought little by little. She grows confident with each passing day that she'll soon return to the land of the living. Amira Haddock, a 22 year old who lives and breathes the life of a Hunter, an organization created by the Human government in order to maintain order between the Humans and the Supernatural. With the Rogue Werewolves growing in numbers, and the threat of Karmina's return getting dangerously closer, she is tasked to take down a rumored Rogue Alpha. Little did she know of what was truly waiting for her in the little old town of Dawson, Wisconsin. Aiden Rose, a Rogue Werewolf who only wanted to live peacefully in his small town alongside his mother and grandfather gets rudely interrupted when a Hunter enters his territory. Little does he realize the connection he has with the Hunter and how troublesome everything will turn out to be with her. As sexual tensions rise between them, chaos continues to reign. Can Amira and Aiden settle their quarreling in order to deal with the monster menace that troubles Dawson, or will Karmina finally get her way? Book 1: Fated to the Werewolf King Book 2: A Vampire's Witch