Funny Sexual Jokes

Lucian Philippe Segovia is a happy go lucky type of guy aside from the fact that he is one of the top Young billionaires of the country Maloko siya, lalo sa mga babae. Mapagbiro at minsan bakya ang trip kahit pa saksakan na siya ng yaman. When he met Thea Denise Vergara ay nahulog agad ang loob niya dito pero di gaya ng mga babaeng nakakasama niya, mailap ito at masungit, at ang dahilan, kasi mayaman siya. Thea hates mingling with the rich kaya naman para mapalapit siya dito ay nagpanggap siyang mahirap.  And when Thea already learned to love him too, saka naman nito nadiskubre ang katotohanan sa pagkatao nito.  And that broke her trust kaya siya lumayo kay Lucian.

Amelia Carter has only loved one man in her entire life. And that's her husband, Noah Allen. But she received nothing but heartbreak for her love. On their second anniversary, Noah came home with her best friend, who was pregnant for him, and threw divorce papers at Amelia's face. "You're barren, and you have nothing to offer me. Lucy will be my wife from now.” He yelled while throwing Amelia's bags out of the house. Amelia begged with tears but her pleas turned on deaf ears, and she was thrown out to the streets. As she contemplated how to take her own life, a fleet of cars surrounded her, and the city's wealthiest billionaire, Damian Donovan, stepped out. "Amelia, will you marry me? I will give you everything you desire if you become my wife," he offered, extending his hand to her. "How do you know my name?" Amelia asked him, dumbfounded. "I know more than just your name," he replied. "In fact, I know everything about you, including your divorce. And I also know you want revenge on your best friend and ex-husband. I can help you." ************************* Damian didn’t believe in love, but he needed a wife to claim the inheritance his uncle left him. Amelia needed to take revenge on her ex-husband, and what better way to do it than a marriage of convenience with his worst enemy? There were only two rules in their fake marriage: no entanglement or sexual relationship, and they would go their separate ways after the arrangement was over. But their attraction for each other is more than they bargained for. When feelings start to get real, and Noah wants Amelia back, will Damian let her go? Or will he fight for what he believes is his?

Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course. Hazel was rejected by someone she loved and was told that he would be engaged to her deadly foe. In great despair, she went to a bar and met this handsome guy (Zac). They drank a lot and played games. Under the influence of alcohol, they got married. However when they came back to her senses, they decide to make things right, but it's hard to get a divorce now because she wants to use the dramatic yet genuine marriage to keep her proud in front of her deadly foe. Zac on the other hand was the future heir to one of the richest and prosperous families. Although he was endowed with an otherworldly handsomeness, he was known to be as cold as ice and had a natural dislike for women although they always craved after him like bees to a honey pot. But for some unknown reason, he finds something unique about Hazel which he can’t explain. Perhaps, it were her eyes which were limpid and pure like autumn water and sparkled like azure pools in the morning sunlight… Would it be possible that they fall in love with each other in the future? Take part in this amazing piece, and experience a story filled with various mysteries and incredible twists as she uncovers the mysteries surrounding Zac who decides to hide his identity and tremendous background in order to win her heart genuinely.

Isang simpleng probinsyana lamang si Anna Marie Castillo, namumuhay sa isang simpleng lugar, simpleng probinsiya. Pero kahit ganoon, masaya siya sa buhay na mayroon siya kasama ang kaniyang pamilya. Mahirap lang sila at trabahador lang ng pamilya Bautista ang kanyang ama, samantalang ang kanyang ina naman ay nag-e-extra lamang. Ang tahimik niyang buhay sa probinsiya ay magugulo sa pagdating ng anak ng mga Bautista na si Kevyn, isang mayabang at antipatikong lalaki. Ano kaya ang kahihinatnan nila kung sa unang pagtatagpo pa lang nila ay hindi na naging maganda iyon? Ano kayang gagawin niya kapag nalaman niyang siya ang magbabantay sa binata habang nasa probinsya ito? Babalik pa kaya ang katahimikan niya sa probinsiya o lalo lang iyong gugulo?

“You dare to think of another man in my presence?” The Alpha growled with a burning desire in his eyes. He glowered at Lavinia whose hands were tied. “What does that man have that I don’t? That filthy vampire, you think he’s going to save you?” His hands ran through her bare skin, sending shivers to her spine. “Please, leave me alone,” Lavinia begged in desperation. Tears welled up in her eyes. “Then be mine, Lavinia.” He leaned closer to her. His breath fanned her face. “I’ll make you the happiest woman alive.” Lavinia shook her head. She pursed her lips while watching the man in front of her. He may be a great man with power but her heart longed for someone else. “No. You’re not him… You’re not Sebastian.” "We had an unspoken deal: He gave me warmth, colors, and lies. In return, he asked for my blood when he's thirsty, my body when he's cold and my heart when he's bored. The funny part is, I still think it's quite a bargain." - Lavinia de Llava

A wolfless child from an ancient royal bloodline, Will be born under a clear midnight sky & the full moon, On the sixteenth day of the seventh month. *** Amarah Saville was taken and hidden away from her pack, The White Shadows because of a prophecy that has been foretold. Growing up, she became a medical assistant, under the care and guidance of the doctors, who took her in. Clayton Langston, became the new Alpha of The Night Howlers when he turned twenty-one, surpassing his older brother, Conrad. Now at twenty-six, his pack became one of the strongest and fearsome under his leadership. One fateful and dangerous night, the fates had conspired where Amarah encountered Clayton by saving him from a vicious attack that was set by the jealous brother. The moment he opened his eyes and met hers, Clayton knew who Amarah is to him. And he will do everything to protect her from all enemies trying to claim her to make the prophecy come full circle. Surrounded by revenge, hatred and betrayal, will Amarah and Clayton get to have the fate they deserved? Can love be able to conquer all? Are they destined to be each others mate? WARNING: Some chapters contain Mature/Sexual Content. Read with discretion.

As the attempts at her resurrection have come to fail time and time again, Karmina's power continues to return to her, thought little by little. She grows confident with each passing day that she'll soon return to the land of the living. Amira Haddock, a 22 year old who lives and breathes the life of a Hunter, an organization created by the Human government in order to maintain order between the Humans and the Supernatural. With the Rogue Werewolves growing in numbers, and the threat of Karmina's return getting dangerously closer, she is tasked to take down a rumored Rogue Alpha. Little did she know of what was truly waiting for her in the little old town of Dawson, Wisconsin. Aiden Rose, a Rogue Werewolf who only wanted to live peacefully in his small town alongside his mother and grandfather gets rudely interrupted when a Hunter enters his territory. Little does he realize the connection he has with the Hunter and how troublesome everything will turn out to be with her. As sexual tensions rise between them, chaos continues to reign. Can Amira and Aiden settle their quarreling in order to deal with the monster menace that troubles Dawson, or will Karmina finally get her way? Book 1: Fated to the Werewolf King Book 2: A Vampire's Witch

Book two of the Alpha's Phoenix mate! Melissa is a simple illiterate human village girl who dreams of going to school and becoming an architectural designer but her dreams get shattered when she is forced to marry a man five times her age. She finds a way to get out of the marriage and with the help of Kaira, goes to a different country where she meets Dean. Dean is the alpha of Black phantom pack who's been waiting to find his mate but after finally finding her, he gets shattered when he realises that she not only is an innocent little girl but also a human who isn't interested in love

"Annalise, when are you going to learn that what you want doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that I get what I want…” He says as he continues to kiss up my body… Annalise Ethelwulf is a warrior-born werewolf who finds her dream comes true when she finds her mate in the Alpha’s son of her new pack. However life is not all roses when her mate wanders but won’t set her free. After catching her mate in their bed with her little sister Annalise runs away from the sight, finding herself in front of a dance club. After entering a one night stand with who she believes is a stranger in a club results in a pup she thought she would never have. Nicolas Nightmoon is the Alpha of the most powerful pack under the werewolf king’s. After going through the pain of losing his mate he didn’t want the burden of another. However a one night stand with the beautiful Annalise changes his life forever but there’s a problem she is already mated… Did the Moon Goddess get it wrong? Did fate put them on the wrong path? Or did someone set her up? *** Warning read at your own discretion as this story may trigger some readers as it contains sexual and physical abuse, some violence and mature scenes. Please read at own discretion!

[18+] This story may contain mature themes such as profanity, drugs, violence, and sexual nature. Read at your own risk. *** Reiana Avy also known as Revy is the best at what she does when it comes to investigating a case of strange murdersㅡbut also the best at giving her superior a lot of trouble because she always does things by herself. One night, she infiltrates a shady nightclub to investigate her sister’s death and let herself get drugged. Soon, she woke up just to find herself in a theatre: what lies before her is an underground auction and she’s being presented as one of the goods. To her horror, the highest bidder is none other than the famous masked man; Crimsonㅡone of the world of crime’s most dangerous men. Revy expects to be killed or mistreated after being sold but for some strange reason, she’s taken to a penthouse where Crimson reveals his identity and proposes a deal to her that led to a contractual marriage.