Funny Shit

She rubbed her forehead profusely, "You do, you could walk away and save yourself now and I will be fine and I will understand." He glanced at her and his gaze locked and there was a level of sincerity in them, "If I save myself, who's going to save you?" ***** Jasmin Whyte was a twenty-six-year-old thief who ran away from her boyfriend after she caught him cheating, an excuse to finally leave her old life behind and start over, but when she discovered that she was two weeks pregnant for her him, she began back to her old ways. It wasn't long before she fell into trouble which was how she ran into billionaire Cainan Inferno and her life took an unexpected turn. Cainan Inferno was a thirty-three-year-old Billionaire and the CEO of The Inferno group which was the largest company in the country. He once had it all with money and looks, but his life took a sour turn after he lost his wife Neriah Gomez to cancer. Meeting Jasmin Whyte sparked the feeling he thought was long dead and he knew the only one capable of helping him move on from his late wife was her. He tracked her down and made her an offer she couldn't refuse while ignoring all the threats her past posed to his name, reputation and social status. All he asks in return was for her to steal his heart. Will she be able to do the one thing he asks or will she lose her heart in the process?

“You’re disgusting, you used me,” I whispered, shaking my head in disbelief, my voice shaking with emotion. “You’re a vile, selfish bastard, and I hope you rot in hell.” A twisted smile tugged at his lips, and for the first time, I saw him for what he truly was. “You’re so dramatic,” he said with a laugh. “You hate your father too, don’t you? You’ve always resented him. And now you’re upset because you caught me with another woman? Is that it? Jealous? You should have learned by now to share your husband with other women, Emma.” “Shut up!” I screamed, my voice breaking. He chuckled darkly. “Come on, Emma. Both your father and brother-in-law have been doing the same for years. It’s not that big of a deal, is it?” *** Emma, a powerful CEO, hires struggling actor Ryan to be her fake fiancé at her sister's wedding. Their staged romance turns real, but Emma discovers Ryan's betrayal and walks away with her head held high. Six years later, Ryan returns to win her back, unaware of the secret Emma is hiding and a dark threat is closing in. As threats loom, will they overcome the past, or lose everything? Can they survive the danger and reclaim their love, or will they lose everything? *** "Mum, where is my dad?” “I don’t know,” I lied. “But you don’t need to worry about that.” “But Mum, how can you not know? The boys said you must be a bad woman if you don’t know who my dad is,” James said, “Please tell me I have a dad.” he started sobbing. Shit!! My honeypot!! “You had one,” I said, my voice breaking. “But we lost him in an accident.”

If you are going to be BAD, then you have to do it the BAD way... It's pretty simple: 1) Don't get caught 2) Always have a Plan B 3) If all else fails... Run...Run for your life! Everyone has a bad side. Some try to deny it's existence, some hide it and others well...they rule the world with it. In the book of being BAD, there are ninety-nine formulas for world domination... Number one: You aren't BAD until you can walk around the school dressed in all pink and have everyone afraid to approach you. Number two: You aren't BAD until you can break into a certain bad boys house and well... do the wrong kinds of stuff. Number three: You aren't bad until quite frankly, you have declared vengeance against the bad boy. ~*~ "I heard you like bad boys," Blade says with a vivid smirk on his face. I glared up at him, without responding clenching my fists fighting the urge to punch him in the face. "So...?" He says after a couple of seconds of silence. "So what?" "So what do you think...Tinker Bell?" He says emphasizing on the stupid name. His face moved closer to mine and I stared back into his green eyes, watching the fire inside ignite. I smirked, "Then find me one." Blade grins at my witty retort and shrugs it off. "I look at you and I see cotton candy, but then you open your mouth... and suddenly you turn into liquorice," he scoffs. "Welcome to the game bitch, your move, now let's play."

"Do you think I will ever walk hand in hand with a girl three times my size? I only dated you because I wanted to know what it feels like, being with a plus size". That statement got her speechless,her heartbreaking so hard it hurts. "Look ,shit happens sometimes". "Tim.... it's... my first time". She sobbed loudly. "Get over it, not like I forced you to give me your virginity,I had to go, clean up the red stains before leaving". He snarled. Beauty's heart pounding, and her tears flow endlessly. He left and slammed the door after him. **** Bullied for being a plus size since her childhood. Beauty Hills had to deal with insecurity ,trauma and depression, most especially self hate. Her name( Beauty) was said to be the exact opposite of her appearance. After many failed toxic relationships, she moved on and got a job in a fashion company. There she had a one sided crush on her terribly handsome and reserved boss,but Who wouldn't! Not every day you get to see a terribly good looking billionaire who isn't arrogant or proud of his looks,a top green flag! Every single beauty queen in the company is head over heels! Beauty knows she got no chance to compete with them It's useless to dream that big! Maybe not...

"Why are you angry?" I asked him. "It's not like we're a couple." He stopped, and stared at me, boring my eyes with his emerald eyes. "If we are…" He paused, clenching his jaw, "then am I allowed to be angry?” I looked at him like he was insane. “Then we'll take it to that level." He continued. "I'm serious. I want you.” Leizel Snow Garcia Waterstrings is not just fierce. She's more than that. Ending up as an ice cream worker in a local ice cream shop, it was her one step of becoming a strong and independent woman. And that's when a cold-hearted stranger came in view. Eion Aurelio Hudson. Out of seven billion people in the world, the two hard-headed people crossed paths, making her "strong and independent woman" facade slowly fall apart. With all the dramas, free food, forgotten birthdays, Robot handling, idiots around, and emotional crisis, will she be able to melt his winter heart with her blazing fire or will this fire be put away instantly? ``` ``` One Blazing Head. One Winter Heart. Two Hard-headed people. A huge disaster. (Book 1 of Hearts Series but can be read as standalone)

18 year-old orphan, Rose Cintilar, wants to fulfill her father's dream of becoming a stylist. She's talented but has the worst luck. When the senior stylist stole her design again, Rose decided to change her fate and apply for a new job: the assistant to singer, songwriter 'Rum'. But why would an international superstar pick a zero for an assistant? Maybe something isn’t right with Rum. Something about him feels superhuman…and Rose is pulled into the world beyond her own; a world of werewolves, the dark whims and the Moon Goddess; and as the Alpha King's mate, Rose must save him from clutches or the dark whims, or the Moon Goddess would fall and plunge both world into darkness. But why would an Alpha king need the help of a mere human? She's not a werewolf... is she?

Office Romance : •••••••• I pulled her towards me while grabbing her shirt collar . She got startled by this and looked at me with her widden scared eyes . Her tears brimming eyes looked at me horrified. "I don't wanna listen any of your excuses . Keep all your fake shit with your self. And by the end of the day ,I want this file perfectly clean in new prints on my table." I said in a deadly clam voice. "Am I clear ?" I yelled on her and shook her by still holding her from her collar. Her few shirt buttons broke down giving me perfect view of her exposed milky chest . I pushed her and she stumbled and fell on the floor. Her whole face was completely red , her clothes get disheavel from wrong places, and all credit goes to me. Tears started flowing from her eyes as she was looking here and there on the floor, like she is trying to sort out if all this happening is real or not. f**k!! I know she is on her edge now. ••••••••• Laksh Malhotra - An arrogant handsome young billionaire. He doesn't like people who cannot stand for their own selves, but lost his heart for the innocent angle Aashirya. But he never behaves around her like a gentlemen does. He always scares her by invading her personal space as a result she always end up being victim of his anger. Aashirya Sharma- A sweet innocent girl who loves everyone around her . She is just like a beautiful angle . But she did survive with lots of demons around her, Coz she never knew that the devil ,aka Laksh Malhotra , was always her saviour in this selfish world, who always tried to take Advantage of her innocence.

Book Two of Cruel Intentions Series. This book can be read as a stand-alone, but for better comprehension of the characters, it is recommended to be read after Betrayed the Mafia. Theodore is the second in command of the Irish mob in New York. He is known as a player, use and toss. Theo hates relationships seeing them as useless. Theodore is funny and lighthearted around his friends, but when dealing with business, he is ruthless and heartless. His cold heart always prevails. Theodore is manipulative and a great liar. Theodore is chosen to help forge an alliance between the Irish and the Americans. He needs to marry the daughter of the boss. He takes his job and position seriously and accepts his fate. He doesn’t believe in love anyway, so that nothing will change for him. He will just have to wear a ring and play house. What happens when she is the girl he has avoided for years, the girl he feels the need to protect? He sees her as a weakness. He condones how she lives her life, but the day he allows himself to get close to her, everything changes, and his addiction to her becomes impossible to resist. Theodore is everything Everly has always dreamed of as an online romance novel writer, and she is inexperienced and sassy. The only way she has experienced love is through her books. She lives almost in captivity because of who she is, and Her purity will be negotiable. But once Theodore pops her cherry, he can’t stay away, involving her in a thread of lies and manipulations that she could only imagine as a plot of one of her books.

Anaheim, the Home of Disneyland in California City famous for Hockey stadium, art museum, convention centres. Among them, it is also famous for nightclubs. On a busy night in California Girls Anaheim(Adult Entertainment Club), Nicolas Winston searches for a girl to spend the night with. While looking around, he come across Elena who just undergone a break up, came to the club to get drunk. Nick sees Elena and ask her to sleep with him. In the beginning she rejects him but later she'll accept the offer. Both of them decides to hook up and end up in a hotel. When Nick comes to know that Elena is still virgin, he drops the idea of sleeping with her. Elena gets excited about Nick and ask about his love life since he talked lot about 'first time' and 'virginity'. Nick and Elena share their love story to each other's. They become friends from One nightstand. Nick and Elena meet again and again on different occasions and share their love stories. Nick helps Elena to overcome her truma from her past life and in return Elena helps Nick overcoming his lost love. Soon, they fall for each other without knowing. Nicolas's side story - High School Love. Elena's side story - Office Romance.

Ethan Lewis has been in the bright lights for as long as he can remember. He’s just turned the cusp of celebrating his twenty-fourth birthday, and yet he feels more like eighty. Living the life of a celebrity isn’t all it is chalked up to be, and dealing with the unruly number of women who are more interested in his billions than who he is as a person is getting old. He has resigned himself to giving up on love and focusing on the only thing that truly gives back – his career. Riley Phillips has always dreamed of being on a big stage with the warmth of the spotlight baring down on her, but she just couldn’t seem to catch the right agent’s attention. After giving a quick commencement speech as Valedictorian of her graduating class at Billmore High, she’s offered something she can’t refuse... The chance to work in Hollywood. It’s not all it’s chalked up to be, but she works hard and finally gets her big break four years down the line. There is a new movie that her agent wants her to audition for, and her co-star? The dreamy Ethan Lewis. She scores the part, but soon regrets it due to his callous, overbearing persona. He’s nothing like the public touts, and she for one isn’t impressed. Funny enough, he is - immensely.