Navy Jokes Novels & Stories

The room went dead quiet when I said I would take the prize, but that quiet did not last. A second later, laughter thundered through the air. Lily Smith was the loudest, doubling over with tears streaming from her eyes. "How else could she be the top seller?" she cackled. "A woman like her has to have skin as thick as a rhino." I ignored her snide comments and kept my cool. "Just to be clear," I said, "since the company so generously 'rewarded' me with bathroom duty, that's all I'll be doing for the next three days. Everything else is off my plate."

Did you have a dream they got eaten by a cannibal? 'Gosh darn, you suck at jokes,' Nev said rolling her eyes. Izzie nodded in agreement. 'You def need a degree in joke-ology to crack one.' They all turned to stare at her. Naima sighed. It was a sigh that meant she couldn't believe the stupidity of the person she was sighing at — which at that moment was Izzie. 'I think you're the one who needs the degree,' Nev said. 'Yeah,' Thelma and Naima said together. 'I'm still mad at you, so don't go thinking you're forgiven.' Naima quickly added. 'Oo, I'm so scared.' Everyone laughed.

Gia said with her attitude and manik, kabir and mukti laughed covering their faces a little knowing navya's nature. "Ohh yeah you are right manik sir only came here to see you and to answer your stupid and unnecessary questions right. I wish you would have been surrounded by some educated people who would teach you how to talk and respect our teachers but alas and yeah miss gia thanks for telling my mouth pretty but sorry i can't give you back this complement because your mouth is not pretty rather it's gutter." Navya said with toothy smile which make every girl laugh and gia angered till no extent. Kabir and manik trying to stop their laughter but they had to. Mukti laughed loudly so that g

Jack comes over first giving us both a hug then Carter does the same; both head off to the other bedroom with their kits slung over their shoulders. "Cheers Noah," They both say in unison; It still makes me laugh when they do that, more so when they finish each other's sentences off. We've owned boats all our lives and virtually grew up on the water; our father was a Navy Officer, Noah left the Navy three years ago when he found out his wife was pregnant, he didn't want the constant upheaval for his wife and daughter he now restores furniture for a living and hes damn good at it, my two younger brothers are both in the navy, and me well I'm a Navy seal I always wanted to push myself that lit

I sat across from him, accepting a coconut he handed me, and began sipping the sweet juice, “I’ve been meaning to ask—what do you do for a living?” He leaned back in his chair, a glint of mischief in his eyes. “I’m a Navy officer.” I choked slightly on my coconut water. “You’re joking.” “Not at all,” he replied, laughing at my reaction. “What did you think I was?” I shrugged, suddenly feeling a little guilty. “Honestly, I thought you were just some thug or something.” Peter laughed heartily. “A thug?” “Well, you gave off riffraff vibes when we met.”

I could tell he was trying to find something else in my expression. "Do you think we can, um, go back to bed for a little? Like, I really want to shower and get into bed for the rest of this horrible fucking day." He faked a military salute, one of the hundreds of inside jokes we have going on. This one is about George trying to raise me military style when I was only a poor teenager. "Your wish is my command."

He looked at me. “No shit?” I laughed at him. “They sink ships and all that stuff. Do you think a ship could sail in this place? I mean really, do you have to look around to answer that question?” Suddenly Kai busted out laughing. He smacked his leg. “I was just pulling your leg man. Someone has got to lighten the mood around here.” I shook my head at him.

I glanced at him and his mischievous expression softened momentarily, then he snapped out of it as quickly as it came. “That’s a whore problem. You’ll figure it out. It’s just dick, you can take it, it’s what you’re good at.” Navy returned, “that, and lying…” he added, turning away.

“Yeah, it’s just me. Fucking Spackler… “ I raised my eyebrows… “got Locke stuck in the mud and then broke his ankle. So yeah it’s only me… what? Don’t they swear in the Navy anymore?” “No ma’am we certainly do not. They busted me down to Private once for saying ‘darn it’.” “They don’t have Privates in the Navy.” I looked down at my crotch, looked back at her, then leaned forward, “I beg to differ. We most certainly do have privates.” She cocked her head a little. “Alright then, Captain, is it?” “Almost. Lieutenant.” “Full looey?” “Well, JG. Junior Grade.”

he murmured, his eyes burning into mine. Something invisible pulled between us. My chest rose and fell with his. I wanted to lean closer, to drown in that look. “Are you two about to start making out?” Navy’s voice snapped the moment in half. She slid into the chair across from us, smirking. I jerked upright. Zane’s scowl was sharp enough to cut glass. Heat filled my cheeks. I must have looked guilty, like a kid caught sneaking sweets. Navy raised her hands with a sheepish grin. “Sorry. Bad joke. Can I sit here?”