Quirky Humour Novels & Stories

“My family owned this before but this is mine now and I manage this. They’re busy with their company” “That’s sick!” “You look really surprised” “I didn’t expect that from you. I thought you were a good-for-nothing jerk” “Hey! You’re insulting me!” “Am I? My bad” I jokingly replied. I know he’s not the type that easily gets insulted. He has deep humor and wits which makes him very versatile when dealing with words spitted out to him. “What about you? You’re alone?” “Uhm… ye---” “Zae!!”

Everyone just laughed like I'm just some kind of a psychopath, what's funny to them, they were laughing and pointing hands, and worse of it the subjects were laughing too, maybe I was stupid for talking without understanding anything, I shouldn't have let my curiosity get the better of me.

Much to my embarrassment, they burst into laughter. "Do you think we'd be interested in serving a member of the royal family? That's bullshit!" jeered the man with green hair, his laughter echoing through the room. I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment. These people were insane! What was so funny about my simple question? They were nothing but uncivilized savages, laughing for no reason!

I could see he was trying to hold in his laughter by the way he pressed his lips together and the way his eyes shone bright with amusement and glee. "You are such a-" I paused trying to think of a perfect adjective for him. "- such a cockalorum." He opened his mouth to retort but immediately closed it. "Did you mean cocklong? Mine is long. Want to see?" I hit him with the pillow. "No duffer, cockalorum. It means an arrogant, annoying and an obnoxious jerk." He let out a chuckle like it didn't matter to him. "I still think it should be cocklong."

he sounded so level headed, so calm and collected- it turned me on for some reason. I thought I’d be offended. But all I could do was laugh, this drink is working. He looked at me with amusement, he probably thinks I’m crazy. “Well I guess we’re both fools for falling in love. Cheers to that” with that, I down the remainder of my drink. He chuckles, damn he sounds so good. “You’re funny, but I’d like to believe it’s only because your drunk right now” I gasped “I’m very offended! I’m the funniest woman you’d ever meet. My sense of humor is unmatched, sober or drunk; but recently, I just laugh at myself. It’s pitiful, almost comical you know?”

She deadass did save my life but something in the back of my mind kept telling me that was not the reason I was agitated to meet her. "Then tell me what the fuck the reason is, you stupid brain." I yelled into my pillow, muffling the sound to the point where it almost sounded non-existent. I'm not one to play mind games, I just wanted to know the reason. Did you get the pun there? I'm so fucking funny. I know you're shaking your head thinking of what a stupid pun that was. But you know it was fucking lit. Maybe I should go into Comedy instead, I'm too funny for Urban/Realistic/Drama. Imagine my next stop being called Life of Eve: Comedy and Puns. What do you think?

“Must I answer all of them now. Can't you respect the fact that you bumped into an old friend after... ” “old friend my foot!” I spat. He arched a brow. “ Wow, You've become more violent than I presumed. ” he grinned. “fine, I'll answer your questions but they're too much. Can you ask little by little again?” I inhaled deeply and exhaled trying to calm down. «Katty calm down you are overreacting » “are you a clone of someone else?” “what do you think?” he grinned. Teasing the little patience I had. I cursed under my breathe, I hate to explain myself... Especially now.

“Devil candies? It's that what it's called now?” Shrugging, “Who cares? It can take any name it chooses. Isn't it responsible for heightening your mood, and fucking your shit up like the devil does?” Quincy glares at me. “Yeah. That sounds like someone I know.” He massaged the side of his head, wincing. “Look, it's fine, okay?,” I replied. “You just weren’t built for it.” He tries to stand properly. Tries. Fails.

“That’s a dangerous compliment, coming from someone who looks like they could start a riot with their eyeliner.” There was a warmth in the corner of my chest that felt like contraband. Humor is dangerous because it makes you like people. Liking is a slippery slope in my profession. “You been following me?” I asked, eventually. Direct questions cut through the fog. He shrugged like it wasn’t a confession. “Maybe. Maybe I was following the music. Maybe I was following the idiot who thought a diner was an acceptable place to sit in a storm and not get chatted up by strangers.”

Which is weird because he never showed me his room. “What is it?” “What the fuck was all that?” “What's wrong with having a conversation?” “You were all smiley and giggling, do you like him?” “I laughed because he's funny, unlike you.” He laughed sarcastically. “Oh so you like funny guys huh? You like clowns.” I rolled my eyes at him and immediately realised my mistake. “What did I tell you about rolling your eyes at me, Freckles?” “I…I…it was a mistake, I…”