Very Funny Jokes

WARNING: R-18 l MATURE CONTENT l SPG l VERY SEXUAL l READ RESPONSIBLY After sharing a hot steamy night, she left him the last money she had in her pocket. A one thousand peso bill as a 'payment for his service'. One week later, the agency hired her and she and started working as a personal chef and housemaid to a man whose identity was unknown to everyone. She only knew him as a CEO whom he thought an old man with a fat belly and a bald head. Working for the old man without seeing him for almost a month was peaceful and pleasant. Cleaning the house, cooking the food and leaving him a note to cheer him up everyday was now her favorite routine. She enjoys serving him. She loves the peace and silence her work is giving. Everything is calm and perfect, not until the day, a young, drop dead gorgeous bachelor with a piercing blue eyes, who happened to be a single dad showed up with his five year old daughter. Who would have thought that the old man, she thought she was working for, is the same man he ridiculed and measured the 'service' lousy and dissatisfied, turned out to be her boss? Could she still run away from him? or Will she let herself be trapped in the midnight again?

Sa edad na 32 ay hindi pa naranasan ni Andrea ang magkaroon ng boyfriend. In short, siya ay NBSB o No Boyfriend Since Birth. Hindi naman siya kapangitan ngunit napakailap ng pagkatataon sa kanya. May nagawa ba siyang malaking kasalanan sa kanyang past life? Sa edad niya ay hindi na siya umaasa pa na may lalaki na magmamahal sa kanya ngunit gusto niya na magkaroon ng kahit isang anak man lang. Puwede naman na magkaroon ng anak na walang asawa kaya naisip niya maghanap ng sperm donor. Hindi artificial insemination ang gagawin kundi natural method. Sa kalagitnaan ng paghahanap niya ay nakilala niya si Martin na isang guwapong bilyonaryo. Unang pumasok sa isip niya na perfect match ang binata para sa kanya ngunit ang problema lang ay hindi siya nito gusto. Mapapayag kaya ito ni Andrea sa nais niyang mangyari? Paano kung hindi? Itutuloy pa ba niya ang paghahanap ng sperm donor o ititigil na lang at tatanggapin na lang na kailanma'y hindi siya magkaroon ng asawa't anak?

Romary Suarez o mas kilala na tawag na Em-Em, ay nagmahal kahit nasa murang edad pa lang siya. Minahal niya ang lalaking iniligtas niya noon mula sa pagkalunod. Lumipas man ang maraming taon ay hindi pa rin nakakalimot ang kanyang puso sa nararamdaman para sa lalaking ito. Nag mag punta sila ng kanyang pinsan at bestfreind sa bar kung asan din ang lalaki na iniligtas niya noon ay muli bumalik ang nakaraan. at dahil sa isang pang yayari. Silang tatlo mag kakaibigan ay naikasal sa mga lalaki nakaaway nila sa bar at isa na nga doon ang lalaking na iligtas niya na Mayor pala ng bayan nila. Hangan ng sama at naging secretary siya ng Asawa. Nahulog na rin ang asawa niya sa kanya at minahal siya, ngunit dahil sa isang pangyayari na nakidnap si Romary kaya na walay siya sa kanyang asawa panahon non ay buntis na siya. lumipas ang dalawang taon ay. Nakita ulit siya ng asawa ngunit hindi niya maalala ito dahil sa ng ka amisia siya. Kahit ganon hindi mapigilan ang pag tibok ng puso niya para sa taong ng pakilala asawa niya.

Dichas, sol y amores (ligaya, liwanag at mga pag-ibig) Te esperare, senorita Toma unos cientos de anos En la primera reunion Te mirare de Nuevo (Maghihintay ako, binibini Abutin man ng ilang daang taon Sa unang tagpuan Muli kita'y susulyapan) Sa inaakala mong tahimik na buhay, pa'no kung sa isang iglap ay maibalik ka sa nakaraan? ‘Yong tipong hindi mo na nga sineryoso history subject mo tapos mapupunta ka pa sa panahon ni Diego Silang. Idagdag mo na rin ang mga kilos mong hindi mala-Maria Clara, saan na ngayon ang bagsak mo? Lalo na't wala ka nag iba pang pagpipilian… Ano ang gagawin mo? Kuwentong iikot sa nakaraan, pagmamahalang handing abutin ng siyam-siyam. Sa sugal ng pag-ibig, hanggang saan ang kaya mong itaya? Para sa pamilya, handa mo bang isuko ang lahat? Paano kung kinakailangan mo nang mamili? Vahlia Rex Medrano, ang babaeng babalik sa sinaunang panahon upang isakatuparan ang misyong hindi niya naman ginusto. Sa kan'yang paglalakbay, masasagot na kaya ang mga katanungang umiikot sa kan'yang isipan?

Brianna Eleanor Garcia, also known as Brii, is not your typical dalagang Pilipina-an independent and strong willed woman who knows how to handle herself. Upon working at the club made exclusively for the billionaires, she met this oblivious man who made his way to Brianna by simply annoying her to simply catch her attention. The man, Prince Dave El-Greco, a hot but arrogant and manipulative bachelor, by all means, wanted to play games with Brianna. He knows that the very first time he laid his eyes on her, he wanted her so badly to the extent of him buying her from the club's bachelorette auction. But then because of Brianna's nature of work, the woman knows how to flip and when to play the El-Greco's card. Eventually, she found out that even if she has a skill in playing man's heart, Prince Dave is irresistibly tough and hard tho, especially when her feelings are now on the line. Will she have the courage to stop it before her heart turns back at her whenever this El-Greco meddles her way of thinking and perception? or will she stand and live to her words by continuing this game that she's already in?

Khaira needs to save her family business. And saving it means—to marry Nygel Peter Quazon Fuentes. Madali lang naman sana 'yun pero meron siyang kasintahan. She was torn between her family and her long-time boyfriend. Until Destiny gave her an answer. Natagpuan na lamang niya ang sarili na kasal na rito. Ang inaakala ng lahat na "fairy tale" ay isang bangungot. Nagawa niyang makatakas sa poder ni Peter nang makunan siya sa baby nila. She thought she'd totally escaped, but after five years…they met again. In a very awkward scene… when her little boy blocked his way and said, "Daddy, marry my mommy!".

As an avid fan of the well - known Filipino singer-songwriter, actor, and model Michael Hugh Perez, Hera Ashley couldn't resists his charm the first time she met him in person. To what extent will she express her love and adoration? What if she's just confused admiration with love? When the table turned, it was only then she realized her true love for her friend Zanjoe.. her blanket, her umbrella and savior. Before she knew it, he was already gone. Is it too late then?

Hindi matanggap ni Syler ang harap-harapang pagtataksil na ginawa sa kanya ng lalaki na una niyang minahal. Of course, she wanted to get even with her ex-boyfriend. Hindi siya makapapayag na hindi ito magantihan matapos siya nitong huthutan ng malaking salapi. Isa sa naisip niyang paraan para makaganti ay siraan ito sa mga nobelang sinusulat niya. Magpakalunod sa alak ang naging solusyon niya sa unang kabiguan sa pag-ibig, ngunit nang mahimasmasan ay doon lang niya napagtanto na nasa ibang kuwarto na siya. It was Rusty Vergara's unit for holy heaven sake! Hindi niya akalain na sa katauhan nito ay madali niyang maipapamukha sa kanyang ex-boyfriend na sa isang kisapmata lang ay kayang-kaya niya itong ipagpalit. Pero sabi nga nila magaling maglaro ang tadhana. Kaya kung makikipaglaro ka rito, siguraduhin mong matalino ka para hindi ka uuwing luhaan sa huli. "We won't fall in love to each other." Ito pa ang natatandaan niyang sinambit niya nang buong tapang. Ano'ng nangyari? Kinain niya lahat nang sinabi niya, dahil isang araw nagising na lang si Syler na gusto na niya ang binata. It was not a part of their deal. Wala man iyon sa plano niya ay handa na siyang sumubok magmahal muli. 'Yon nga lang ay hindi siya naging handa sa panibagong kamalasan na darating. Yes, she's a romance writer. Umiikot sa usaping pag-ibig ang mga sinusulat niya. Pero dahil sa kabiguan din sa pag-ibig ay ayaw na niyang maniwala na nag-eexist pa ang happy ending, kung hindi rin naman siya ang magiging heroine ni Rusty sa totoong buhay.

Aria Austra Lindsei is a sophomore student at Easton University who always involved herself in many different fights. She's independent, smart, and gorgeous, but despite the fact that most of her female schoolmates hate her for being the Campus Princess and the boys’ fantasy; she doesn't give a damn about it. She likes being herself— the boyish kind of girl that not everyone likes. She hates boys, even girls who pissed her off— actually, she hates everybody. She’s a type of girl that is very hard to control. She knows what she wants, and she knows what she doesn’t want in her life. And her life in college was normal, not until she met her new science professor, Sir Gray. Grayson Henry Carter is a very good-looking college professor that everyone likes— except her. Sir Gray is a type of man that makes Aria powerless and controlled, that is the reason why she hates him. She doesn’t want to be controlled with her actions, especially by a man. But everything started to change when she found her heart pounding for a man for the first time, which made her question her thoughts about men. And while dealing with her uncontrollable and strange feelings for her new professor, everything from her past started to come back into her life to remind her that men will only do bad things that will cause great distress and trauma into her life. What will Aria do if she found out the mysterious dark side of her Sir Gray?

Love is an overrated word, and just like a spell that brainwashes our system, people are bound to search for their true love -- but not in Marion’s case. Her adoptive family, together with her biological father, wants her to have a child of her own. And when the dazzling one hundred billion pesos inheritance is on the line, she will trample her beliefs and desperately search for a man that will give her outstanding genes for her ‘one hundred billion pesos baby.’