Yo Mamma Jokes

“Gusto mo akong maging sa ‘yo ulit? Then, kailangan mong mamili. Ako o ang asawa mo?” “Gusto mo bang ikaw ang piliin ko?” “Kung tunay kang lalaki, alam mo kung sino ang pipiliin mo.” Napangisi si Warren at bumulong sa kaniyang tenga. “It doesn't matter if I am a man or not. Mas alam ng katawan mo kung gaano ako kalalaki, kaysa ng bibig mo.” **** Lubos ang sakit at paghihirap na dinanas ni Allison nang siya ay manganak, habang ang kaniyang asawa na si Warren ay nagpakasal sa bago nitong asawa. Ang akala ng lahat ay namatay siya noong araw na 'yon, ngunit ang totoo ay buhay siya sa ibang pangalan at pagkatao. Ngunit ang akala niyang kambal na anak, ay triplets pala! Hindi siya papayag na ibang babae ang kikilalanin nitong ina. Ngayon, ay gagawin niya ang lahat makuha lang ang anak niya, kahit pa isang Warren Harrison na isang bilyonaryo ang makakalaban niya. Pero paano kung hindi lang ang tadhana ang gagawa ng paraan para sa kanila? What if ang triplets nilang anak ay tila nasa isang secret mission para magkabalikan sila? OMG! Triplets On A Secret Mission!

BLURB: Sa isang malaki at mamahaling restaurant na pag-aari ni Richmond De Guzman, nagtrabaho ako roon bilang baguhang waitress. Hindi ko inasahan na mapalapit ako sa kaniya—minahal siya nang hindi ko sinasadya. Naramdaman ko rin ang attention niya na tila sumasagot sa nararamdaman ko. Tunay na naging malapit kami sa isa’t isa hangang sa isang araw... para akong pinag-sakluban ng langit at lupa. Nang sabihin niya sa akin na dumalo sa opisina niya sumunod ako, at isang nakakawindang na pangyayari ang aking nakita; si Natch at siya nakita kong nagháhálikan. Sobra akong nagsisi, nagalit sa sarili na umasa ako kahit walang kami. Ang mas masakit pa dahil may nakaraan pala sila. Ang dami kong nalaman na sobrang hirap tanggapin. Siguro ganoon nga talaga kapag assuming ka, sinasampal rin sa ‘yo ang isang bagay na ina-assume mo. Sa sobrang sama ng loob, pinili ko na lang umalis—hindi nagpaalam. Sumama ako sa mga magulang ko papuntang Singapore. Ilang taon ang dumaan, muli kaming pinagtagpo ng tadhana. Talagang hindi na tulad ng dati ang ‘ngayon,’ maliban sa nararamdaman ko. Bakit hindi ito nagbago? Gusto kong maging malaya, pero ang hiyaw ng puso ko ay iba. Dapat ko bang pairalin ang pride ko o sasabihin ko sa kaniya ang totoo?

Roxanne Rowan is a spiritual news editor. After an accident in the year twenty-two, Roxanne Rowan was able to see ghosts. She goes around trying to find a way to solve this ability. Her fear of ghosts makes her taciturn and closed off. During an encounter with evil spirits, Roxanne met Egan Griffith, the demon employee of hell. He has the task of catching the demons that are causing trouble in the living world to bring them to hell and punish them. According to the orders of the spirit world, if Roxanne wants to break the ability to see ghosts in her eyes, she must cooperate with Egan to catch the devil spirits. The contract is signed and many bad jokes happen. Roxanne's fate and secret are also revealed. She also realizes that demons come in two forms: disrupting people in the living world and trying to earn money in order to survive like a normal person. Every night, Roxanne has to lie in bed waiting for Egan to finish processing the documents for the company. She doesn’t think from an unequal partnership to rolling in bed so close together.

" YOLO " is her life motto. Sa edad na bente tres anyos, walang ginawa si Devon Valencia kundi ang magpakasaya sa buhay at waldasin ang perang ibinibigay sa kaniya ng ama. Wala siyang pangarap sa buhay—o kung mayroon man, hindi niya iyon alam at wala rin siyang balak alamin dahil alam niyang siya rin naman ang hahawak sa negosyo ng pamilya nila pagdating ng araw. Young, wild and free. Literal ang pagiging malaya ng isang Devon Valencia para gawin ang lahat ng gusto niya. Sa isang pitik lang ng daliri niya, nasa kamay na niya ang hinahangad niyang makuha, maliban na lamang ang atensyon ng isang binatang kabaliktaran ng ugaling mayroon siya. Isang maginoo,responsable at matipunong lalaki, Pablo Santino Regalado. Isang magsasaka na ang tanging hangad ay maiahon sa hirap ang kaniyang magulang. Sa edad na bente sais, naka-plano na ang gusto niyang mangyari sa buhay dahil maaga siyang namulat kung gaano kalupit ang realidad. Nakahanda siyang gawin ang lahat maibigay lang ang buhay na ipinangako niya sa pamilya. Ngunit sa kauna-unahang pagkakataon, nagkaroon ng pagtatalo ang isip niya nang alukin siya ng isang trabaho na may magandang suweldo at wala siyang ibang gagawin kundi ang bumuntot sa magiging amo niya. Kung tutuusin, walang nakikitang problema ang binata sa pagiging isang bodyguard dahil batak naman ang kaniyang katawan at nakasisiguro siyang kaya niyang gampanan nang maayos ang trabahong ibinibigay sa kaniya. Subalit 'yong ideya na isang matapobre ang dalagang babantayan niya, tila mas gugustuhin pa niyang makasama ang mga kalabaw na ilalim ng araw. Kapag binato ka ng tinapay, batuhin mo ng palaman. Kapag nahulog ka sa taong hindi nagpapakita ng interes sa'yo, siguraduhing may bitbit kang hagdan.

Mia Hartley felt her heart pound with disbelief as she stood at the altar, staring at Nicholas Hernandez, her former tormentor from high school, now poised to be her husband.The memories flooded back,the cruel jokes, the relentless bullying. How could fate be so cruel as to bind her to him in marriage? Nicholas, now successful and charming, had meticulously planned this marriage to secure his inheritance. However, he became shocked when he saw Mia at the altar and also Mia’s best friend. . . Meanwhile, Mia's supposed friend, who harbored hidden animosity since high school, was equally stunned. As Mia's bridesmaid, she realized Nicholas, the groom, is the guy who she has been trying to force herself on for the past ten years. What happens when Mia realizes that her friend is her greatest enemy? How would Mia cope being married to her bully who she is scared of?

To fulfill his sister's birthday wish, Anthony - a billionaire CEO who loves privacy perfection and orderliness - has to accommodate Vivian, a stubborn lady who doesn't care about details and is used to chaos. They start out as enemies, fighting over every little thing but they have no choice - Anthony has to fulfill his sister's birthday wish, and Vivian has nowhere to go as her parents sent her packing. Slowly, they begin to see the good in each other, and that they aren't all that bad after all. From small talks and jokes, they progress to filling in as dates for the other, until they fall in love. But Vivian didn't disclose everything about her reason for being disowned and sent away by her parents, Until her past and her arranged husband begins to haunt her. Will their love stand the test of time? Only one way to find out!

"Mom, please stop searching for a lover. I don't want Fathe r's condition to deteriorate further due to your behavior. Ot herwise, I will destroy any relationship you have with any m an!" Chelsea admonished, giving a warning. She had lost c ount of how many warnings she had given, given the nume rous men her mother had approached for money, despite h er father's serious illness. "It's up to you, do whatever you want. I don't care anymore because I can't bear to live in poverty," the mother replied c almly, indifferent to Chelsea's feelings. "Fine, if that's what you want. I swear I will marry one of yo ur most meaningful lovers!" Chelsea promised her mother when the pain had taken over her.

After an accident, Averie's life changes drastically. She is hunted by two groups of werewolves that she never thought existed alongside humans. The werewolves from the demon pack want to get something from her, while the werewolves from the righteous pack just want to protect humanity and avoid the world plunging into chaos because of her. However, one person steps out and protects her at all times: Lance. He claims to be her protector, unaware of his hidden agenda in approaching her. While protecting her from danger, the two of them fall in love and vow to only love each other until their next life. But fate loves to play jokes on Averie's life. She discovers that she was the reincarnation of Avaria, a wicked and powerful black fairy in her past life, destined to bring disaster to humanity. The soul of Avaria has been dormant inside her body, waiting to awaken at the right time. But the cruelest twist of fate is that the person she loves and trusts the most is a werewolf protector from the righteous pack, who harbors the strongest desire to kill her. Lance is the very person who had taken the life of Avaria in her past life and is destined to do so once again in her present life. Will they defy their ill-fated destiny to attain the happiness they yearn for, or will they ultimately destroy each other, fulfilling Avaria's thirst for revenge? Can Averie succeed in proving that she is the true owner of her body, not by any woman from her past?

“Pinili kong umalis para hindi ka mahirapang pumili at magdesisyon.” Lumuluhang sabi ni Via sa binata. Mapaklang ngumisi si Russell at nakakainsultong tumitig sa mga mata niya. “Do I need to thank you for that? Do you fucking want to hear me say, Oh, thank you for fucking ruin my life!” Napapitlag siya nang sigawan siya nito ngunit hindi siya nagpatinag. Alam niyang kasalanan niya kung bakit nito sinasayang ang buhay nito. “I don’t have any choice—” “Goddamn it, Via! Don’t fucking tell me that you don’t have a damned choice! Pinili mong iwan ako sa kabila nang labis kong pagmamahal sa’yo! You choose to hurt me, so stop telling me your bullshits and get lost!” Nakagat niya ang kanyang labi at pinigilang huwag mapahagulhol. Nasasaktan siya sa sinapit nito, ramdam niya ang matinding galit nito sa kanya. Magagawa niya pa rin bang gamutin ang sugat na tinamo nito nang iwan niya ito? Could she really have a chance to fix the bad boy’s, broken heart?

"Akala ko ba contract marriage lang ang kasal natin? Bakit sinasabi mong mahal mo ako?" Ngumiti si Mattheus, niyakap si Gianne at hinalikan siya sa labi. "Well, wife. Para sa'yo, contract marriage lang 'to. Pero para sa'kin, love deal 'to." _____ Sa halip na proposal ang sumalubong kay Gianne, panloloko ng boyfriend niyang si Calix at ng bestfriend niya mismo ang nakita niya sa cellphone ng lalaki. Sa sobrang sakit ng kalooban, nakipaghiwalay siya. Sa hindi inaasahang pagkakataon, nakilala niya si Mattheus—isang gwapo at mayamang lalaki na tumulong sa kanya noong manakawan siya. Pumayag siya sa kasal na inalok ni Mattheus— dahil kailangan niya ng asawa sa lalong madaling panahon at si Mattheus naman ay kailangan ng asawa para matigil ang lola nitong pinipilit na itong i-blind date sa iba't ibang babae. Sinunod ni Gianne ang kasunduan at ginampanan ang papel bilang contract wife. Pero isang araw, sinabi ni Mattheus ang hindi niya inaasahan—mahal na siya nito. At saka naman biglang bumalik si Calix, humihingi ng pangalawang pagkakataon. Sino ang pipiliin niya?