You Re So Old Jokes One Liners

“You must be fooling yourself if you think I would accept being mated to a filthy, wolfless omega like you. Let’s cut to the chase and get to it. I, Xavier, future Alpha of Crystal Pack, reject you as my mate.” Xavier said and threw me to the ground. “Pathetic!” With one last disgusted glance, he left the room. *********** Abused and disregarded by the entire pack members, her adoptive parents, and her twin sister, who loathes her. Ariana endured all of this, hoping for a better life when she finally meets her mate. But when she is rejected by the one person she has waited for all her life, Ariana is heartbroken and plots to escape and start a new life of freedom, but fate has other plans for her. When Alpha Arthur comes to trade for omegas, and Ariana is brought forward as the last omega, she discovers she has been given a second chance mate. Arthur, the ruthless Alpha King who doesn’t believe in love but sees it as a weakness to his legacy, and a fragile, wolfless omega who happens to be his mate and maid. Can these two ignore the pull that keeps drawing them closer? Can Ariana break through the cold-iced heart of Arthur and bring warmth into it? Arthur is related to Ariana’s painful past. Will she claim her rightful place as his Luna at Shadow Howl Pack or let the consequences of their past destroy her forever?

เมื่อเขาต้องการหานางแบบมาเป็นนางกินรีแสนสวย ด้วยความแอบชอบ เธอเลยยอมสมัครไปเป็นนางแบบแล้วยอมไปนอนกางเต็นท์ค้างคืนในป่ากับเขาสองคนเพื่อรอถ่ายแบบ แต่กว่าที่เขาจะถ่าย นางกินรีก็โดนเช็คของไปถึงไหนต่อไหน

All Norah wanted was to finish nursing school and keep her head down. She didn’t expect Ivan Thomas—the boy with the broken past and the fire in his eyes. He was her first protector, her first heartbreak… and the man she never forgot. Years later, their paths cross again. He’s powerful now, and still impossibly drawn to her. But love between them comes with scars, second chances, and a fight for forever.

Alexis Jenn Buenavista, a 24-year-old spoiled brat from a wealthy, influential, and famous family, has a life revolving around drinking with friends as if there's no tomorrow. Work isn't in her vocabulary. That's how she's always been... until one day, her parents told her to marry 38-year-old billionaire Zac Rogen Walker. As a stubborn and spoiled brat, she tried to run away but was caught by Zac's bodyguards. She can't accept the idea of an older husband! Zac needs an heir for his company, and his parents are pressuring him to marry since he's not getting any younger. He chose Alexis because of her youth and vitality, which would surely provide him with an heir. The two make a contract that gives Alexis the freedom she once had, but with one condition: she can't have sex with her boyfriend or any other man except Zac. And so, their awkward married life begins. Who will give in to temptation first? Who will give up? And who will fall in love?

My husband, Malcolm Thorpe, has low sperm motility. After 33 rounds of IVF, I finally got pregnant. On delivery day, I start hemorrhaging, and the medical team calls for an emergency C-section. Malcolm signs the consent form, then rushes straight back to his childhood sweetheart's birthday party. But instead of starting the C-section, the surgeon says, "Ms. Jacobson, the electronic medical record lists you as single. This consent form isn't valid." I stop breathing for a beat. The happy marriage I believe in turns out to be a sham. Later, Mom and Dad rush in and sign the consent for me. But by then, the baby is gone. The asphyxia lasted too long. After surgery, I scrawl my name on the cremation consent with shaking hands, then dial a number without thinking. "Samuel, are you free now? Meet me in front of City Hall."

Party-goer si Karisma. Isang gabi nang may magtangkang masama sa kanya ay iniligtas siya ng isang lalaki na nandoon, si Tobias Ortega. Nang malaman ng kanyang ina ang nangyari ay inutusan siya nitong pilitin ang binata na pumayag para maging personal bodyguard niya, kung hindi ay hindi na siya papayagan pang dumalo sa mga parties. Ngunit ayaw ni Tobias, kaya’t nagpasya si Karisma na pilitin ito at ligawan. Mapapapayag niya kaya ito?

On my fifth birthday with Zachary Murdock, I sit once again in front of a full table of cold food, just like every year before. Zachary had promised, as always, to spend the day with me. And, as always, he breaks that promise. This year, it's because his childhood sweetheart wanted to shoot a set of "artistic photos". She invited him and a few of his close buddies to be part of it. Without hesitation, he ditches me again and runs straight into her arms. At 11:00 pm, his childhood sweetheart posts a photo to her social media and sets it so that only I can see it. In the picture, four men are in nothing but black briefs and Windsor-knotted ties. They kneel around her while she is draped in sheer fabric like a goddess. The caption reads, "Some people beg for crumbs, but I own the entire bakery." I take a screenshot. Then, I send it to the girlfriends of all three of Zachary’s best buddies. If they all look down on me this much, let's hope they don't end up on their knees begging me someday.

Being a billionaire, I've had a fair share of women in my life. But the first time I laid eyes on her, I couldn't help but have her in my arms. I knew what had to be done, I needed to make her MINE. But that wasn't an easy task, considering how resilient she can be. The more I got to know her, the more I realized what a different and strong woman she was. I wanted to give her everything but trust? that had to be earned and she had done nothing but hid from me since the beginning. She was ruining everything we had just to protect a single secret, she didn't trust me enough for it. "It's better this way" she said, but was it really?

"Mulai hari ini, kamu adalah salah satu pemilik saham terbesar Han Group." "Tidak ... tidak mungkin," gumam Windi sambil terus menggelengkan kepala. Tangannya bergetar hebat karena shock mengetahui dirinya kaya mendadak dalam semalam. *** Windi, seorang gadis yatim piatu, tidak pernah menyangka jika perjalanannya ke Korea Selatan akan mengubah hidupnya 180 derajat. Tidak hanya menemukan takdir cintanya, Windi juga menemukan rahasia masa kecilnya yang kelam. Siapakah Windi sebenarnya?

Siya yung tipo ng babae na exaggerated mag-isip. Sobrang layo ang nararating ng utak niya, sweet at mabait pero may pagkatang* at childish nga lang siya. Yun ba'ng lagi nalang siya nasasabit sa gulo dahil sa pagiging down to the highest level niya'ng mag-isip. She's Amie Hera Madrigal. What if dahil sa katangahan nito ay makikilala niya ang hindi inaasahang tao? A man that might think every girls dream. Isa lang naman ito sa pinakasucessfull businessman. Nah, scartch that. Isang aroganteng tao. A man who hates stupid people the most. That man is King Alexander Jauqez, a boss from hell. He is worst than a control freaking dictator. He is the saboteur of office romance, and no one ever dare to obey him. May pag-asa kaya na magkasundo silang dalawa? Ngayon pa at parehas nilang kailangan ang isa't isa o mauuwi ito sa walang hangganang bangayan? May pag-asa ba na mabuo ang salitang "Love"? Is there really a happy ending in every story? Or not every story has one?