THE LAST THING I REMEMBERED

LOLA

"Let me go," I tried again, but I wasn't even sure if I heard myself. I was too gone from the alcohol to make any decision at that moment.

The strong arms guided me forward forcefully, against my own wish which I was too weak to enforce.

I was going to go in for a fight, but I held myself back. His fingers clasped around my arm felt more like a promise than danger.

We had gotten to the entrance when someone grabbed my wrist.

"You haven't settled your tab," a deep voice honed, interrupting the moment I was already drowning in with every willingness and glee.

I struggled to keep my vision steady but all I could get used to were dark images in slow movement.

I winked again and then again, hoping my vision clears out, but that wish didn't make it out of my thoughts.

"Yes---thank you" I heard someone say, but I couldn't quite make out who.

It was almost like my brain was playing games with me.

I was still secured in position by the arms of that stranger.

I heard a sound of a soft swipe , then a beep and a pop sound that sounded like the notification for the completion of a process.

My head was heavy. Even though I couldn't see anything, I still struggled to keep my eyes open.

I wanted to tug myself free, but I found myself leaning more into the warmth of his arms. I found myself slowly wanting to be trapped forever in the moment.

I felt a scratching patch roughen the edges of my throat.

I swallowed, the weight of the desire building up, refusing to go down my stomach.

A strange cold gripped me.

It was like I was the only one in that room without clothes.

My hands moved - steadily, hastily, for confirmation. I gave myself a quick search down, around my chest and down to my knees. If anyone was looking, they'd probably think I've gone crazy.

But then, I was probably thinking ahead of myself again. Maybe, Eddy was right all along. I would never be in the spotlight. Nobody would ever want to watch me.

Tears tugged at my eyelids. Shaking my head, I blinked it back hard.

The noise from around me intensified - pop music accompanied by screaming dancers and loud impatient customers.

I threw my hands around my ears, pressing down hard to block off the noise that made my head slam hard against my skull and my sight worse.

At that moment, a hand nudged me lightly by the side.

I moved.

I wasn't sure where he was leading me, but I followed anyway. I needed to get out of there.

After about a minute, I could tell we were outside. Somewhere behind me, the noise slowly rumbled away, and the night wind rolled leisurely against my skin.

After about another minute, I felt my body sinking into the hard or a car seat.

His car smelled like it was brand new - no distinct scent, just clean and unused.

I heard the door slam close behind me and my skin stiffened to the thought of having to be alone in such a small space with this mystery man that had somehow become my saviour tonight.

I wasn't sure if it was the dullness of my vision contributing to my improved hearing, or my racing heart accounting for every next second that followed - from the number of steps he took to walk around to the driver seat, to when he opened the door and finally settled into his seat, clasping his seat belt secured and turning with a slight pressure against the materials of the car seat, I knew every moment in depth.

I could tell he was looking at me now, but I still wasn't able to make out what he looked like and strangely, it made between my thighs even hotter.

I couldn't even pretend I wasn't losing it sitting in front of him like this, not being able to do anything.

My head felt light, like I was floating on the clouds. My stomach rumbled from the emptiness replaced generously by alcohol.

"Oops. Sorry about that," I stuttered, my voice sounding strange - defeated, impatient.

He didn't reply, his position didn't change. He was leaning forward towards me and it made my heart burn with a strange desire to lean in too, see what he does next.

My eyes still drowsy, my p*ssy still throbbing, my heart still pounding, with all of the courage, I shifted in my seat to face him.

He didn't move.

A belch rose up to my throat. I couldn't hold it in so I let it out, loudly, my stomach turning upside down. My thoughts too.

My voice tore through the silence of the quietness of the car's interior.

"Do you hate me?"

I gulped against the absurdity of my own question.

Silence.

I was about to give up on getting an answer when I saw his head move, to the left, then slowly to the right and then back in position.

No?

My mouth spoke just before my head thought. 

"Do you think I do not deserve to be looked at?"

I had returned one of Eddy's line to the stranger whose face was inches away from mine, who had boldly stated that he loved me despite the countless flaws Eddy saw in my existence, whose breathing I could feel rub against mine in the privacy of inside a car, parked under the shade provided by the darkness that lurked a distance from the entrance of the club.

I swallowed - shamelessly, my tongue dancing to a tune it had never heard before, in anticipation to an answer I was sure would defeat Eddy in a certain way.

My body pumped with anxiety as I watched keenly, for the slightest modification of his position in that moment.

My eyes were heavy. I could barely see.

Then, like electricity, the warmth of his palm greeted the thick of my thighs, causing me to gasp at how suddenly his hand had moved.

At first, he came and remained steady, then slowly, he stroked back and forth, against my cotton skirt, as if trying to convince me, either to never ask such a question or perhaps a silent plea to allow him go on.

I grabbed his hand, causing him to stop. My eyes were heavy. My thoughts were heavier, messy. I could feel the heat from his gaze against my skin, probably wondering what to do next.

I wanted him to touch me. The heat had gathered in a pool that was a release away between my legs, but that was the last thing I remembered.

Him. Me. His car. My hand. His hand. My thoughts. Darkness.