actually funny jokes

Blaire Summers doesn't do serious, but she soon finds herself in a very serious situation. One that will deem her homeless if she doesn't find a job that actually pays. When she lands an interview at ALPHA INC, she expects the boot after she notices the line in tow for the job. She couldn't be more wrong. Luther Reed is more than just the CEO, he's ALPHA of the Legend Pack. He's ruthless, cunning, and never found his mate, which doesn't bother him in the least. Not having a mate means he doesn't have a weakness. Until Blaire stumbles into his office for an interview, and he knows instantly she's his mate. The kicker is that she's human, and has no idea werewolves exist. It's easy to turn to the next interviewee, and forget her. Until he sees Axel Hanes, the dirty Lycan tycoon, talking to her outside of his office window. That forces the hair on his neck to stand, and he hires Blaire, which causes a downward spiral of events that break Luther's guard, and forces him into situations that will cost him his position, and a war with the Lycans he didn't see coming.

Oladele Anjola is an 100lvl student of Computer Science who just got admitted into Federal University of Technology, otherwise known as FUTA. She's extremely reserved and a big introvert. Although beautiful and intelligent, she has zero social skills. Adeleke Kolawole is your typical one of the most popular guys at FUTA. Cute, tall, handsome and brilliant and has more than half of the female population running after him. But Kola is the second definition of being snubbish and icy. He barely has friends and keeps to himself. Jola is totally smitten by Kola on their meeting and for the first time in Kola's life, he has a girl in his head. No matter how hard he tries to get her out of his head, she wouldn't budge, its not like he wanted her out of his head though. And so, an interesting love story starts. What will happen when Jola discovers that her very first friend in FUTA, Fisayo also has a huge crush on Kola. Will she give him up for friendship or give up her friendship for Kola. Its truly an hard decision, but sometimes before anyone else, we should come first.

Tyra is an orphaned pup, adopted by a good family after her father, a brutal Alpha was killed. She's obsessed with escaping her blood oath, made at just ten years old, requiring her to marry an Alpha's son. Tyra dyes her hair, gets tattoos and piercings, anything to change her body and show her arranged mate that she alone is in control of her body. She's waited patiently for her wolf to claim her, but she knows that when it happens, Alpha Zachary is coming for her, to make her his Luna. Tyra's entire world is turned upside down when she meets Zachary, only to feel the mate bond. She is livid to discover that she wants him, and can't control her body around him. What's worse is, he is actually a nice guy. Alpha Ridge is a 26 year old who has waited a very long time for his mate, and is just about to give up when he meets Tyra on the very night she gets her wolf. How are their fates intertwined? Did the Goddess make a mistake and give Tyra two mates? Find out on this whirlwind story that will keep you guessing! *This is a spin off of my Shadow Warrior series. This book follows Alpha Ridge and Tyra, and provides more background on the Blood Claw pack. It can be read as a stand alone book. This book contains strong sexual content and violence.*

"Make sure you wipe the counter," I remind him while wearing my panties. "With my tongue?" "Sure, if you wipe again with disinfectant after that." "Awww my little girl all grown up, using the word disinfectant and all. Bet you're getting deflowered any day now!" I smack his head while he laughs, thinking it's funny to keep on teasing me since last week. "I hope his willy isn't as big as mine," okay what now, "so he won't hurt your flower." I wanted to be mad at him, I do, but I laugh instead, stupid Toffer and his little boy talk. *** 30 year old Nina is confused with her hopeless love life. While her best friend pleasures women in the next room, she remains in her space keeping her virginity in-tact, wondering if she’s meant to be with her first love or she needs to move on to find her true soulmate. It takes my first love to end my dating strike. But will it take my first love to end my virginity?

Kathryn Michaels is a country bumpkin with an honest personality. She's also a timid woman who tends to make careless mistakes at work. Just one glare can easily make her burst into tears. Chris Albert is the most well-known man in Harborlean. He's a cruel and bloodthirsty man with a penchant for brutal and inhuman methods. No woman dares to pine after him even though he's blessed with gorgeous looks. Unexpectedly, a woman actually manages to sneak into his room and sleep with him while he's drunk! Just as Chris scours the world for the mysterious woman, he realizes that his secretary is putting on more weight each passing day. With a dark expression on his face, he coaxes, "Tell me, Kathy. Were you the woman from that night?" Kathryn meets the dangerous man's eyes before shrinking away from him in fright. "N—No!"

"So many promises, so many dreams. They all broke today," his voice resonated. "Your promise of loving me till the last breath of your life, your dream of becoming my wife and giving birth to my children….they all are shattering today, princesa," tears rolled down from her eyes at his words which made him wrap his arm around her waist. "Ssh …. don't cry. Maybe not love but I do feel sympathy for your tears as I had been living with you for so many days," he uttered while wiping her tears with his knuckles. "Besides, I am not that heartless so let's ease up your heartbreak a bit. Okay?" He uttered. "So not in front of this world but I can please you like a husband pleases his wife behind closed doors and…." He thrusted his face closer to hers. "On my bed…. just like last night where you let me devour every inch of your skin, princesa," She teared up more because that was the truth. She had actually surrendered her everything to him last night. Her heart, her soul, her body…. everything to him with no shield last night. She gave him the virtue of her body but only to let him taint it with his sin which she was believing as his love. Feeling him wrapping his arm more firmly around her waist, she found him untying the knot of her night robe. "So, how about I make you forget about your heartbreak by taking you to my bed?" he rasped in her ear, completely untying her night robe and his next words crushed her soul cruelly. "As I am sure that would be the best way to cure the pain of a prostitute's daughter and her deceitful love,"

Aaron Morris had it all. Good looks, a beautiful girlfriend, good grades in college. He only had one problem. He was being stalked by a red-haired nightmare otherwise known as Bella Davis! She was the bane of his existence, a thorn on his side who won't leave him alone no matter what. Will he ever get rid of her or will she continue to annoy him with her unrequited love?*This is the spin-off of The Ugly One but can be read as a stand alone novel. However, I recommended you read that one first :)*

"You conniving bitch, I've had enough of you! Your face makes me sick! Just fricking go to hell, Lana!" The anger in his eyes, the disgust on his face... These were everything Lana was used to,. but her heart still bled at those words. 23yr old , Lana Fernandez wanted nothing more than the love of her husband but this seems like a dream that can never be accomplished. Her husband, Damien Romero only married her at the insistence of his grandmother because she saved his life but his heart will always belong to his ex-lover Rina... or so he thought. Trapped in a loveless marriage to be an afterthought, to a woman she'd never measure up to, and mistreated by both her husband and his family, Lana seeks a divorce after the loss of her baby. Determined to forget him completely, she returns to her life and suddenly, Damien sees she's not who he thinks she is. The woman who was thought to be a gold digger and a low life was actually a Billionaire Heiress! And as ugly truths rear up their ugly heads, Damien realises he wants her back and she's actually the key to his sanity. But will Lana help him discover the peace he seeks? Or will she let him be devoured by the very pain he caused her?

Paige was reassigned to a new boss. She had zero clue as to what she was walking into. However right from the start that spark was there and it turned into a flame that could burst into a raging fire at anytime. She had to wonder if they would actually ever get any work done. When the two meet everything goes right for the both of them changing their lives for the better as long as they continue to work together. When huge life decisions loom in front of them it was easier to accept them because the other was there. A Cinderella story with a few twists and turns that shows that love has no time table.

Cassandra Johnson is Pixie. Pixie is Cassandra Johnson. She's the same girl who's leading two extremely different lives. Nobody would suspect the school's nerd as Pixie. 'Cause Pixie's a street fighter badass and the nerd does not have a single badass bone in her body. The chances of people discovering this peculiar secret is close to none but of course this is where fate inserts the certified new boy into the equation and makes an exception for him. Warning: heavy flow of profanities ahead. - and tears - or so I've heard.