Funniest Things To Say Novels & Stories

I shouted and he spilled his coffee a bit. "You scared me. God! This is the best option.They will contact you soon by today" "What Do You Think I Am A House To Be Auctioned?" I was getting angrier here and he burst into laughter. "Stop laughing like you are seeing me stripping" and he again laughed. "God you are hilarious when you are angry" he tried saying between his laugh. Did I tell you that I feel sorry for him.. well scratch that I feel sorry for myself... Why I got this insane species of human as my best friend.

she laughed again. “That’s why people say that friends are worse than enemies,” I muttered, clearly humiliated and looking like a freaking Raggedy Ann. After she laughed for the next two minutes, Mara finally said, “I almost peed my pants laughing. By the way, who the hell would put paint in your shampoo bottle? That’s such a crazy prank on a blonde.” “I know,” I groaned, pulling a beanie over my hair. Even in the San Francisco heat, I’d sweat bullets rather than let someone see this mess.

He said this to me while stuttering and sweating profusely on his palm. I paused for a moment before smiling because I suddenly remembered an old joke. "What makes fowl so amusing?" Arthur arched his brow and couldn't come up with an answer. I cleared my throat and imitated how fowls make noise. "Becauseeeeee!!" I declared, making both of us laugh out loud.

A message bubble lit up under his name, cheerful and oblivious. Just another one of his dry, stupid jokes—something about his dinner being so terrible he was convinced the restaurant was trying to assassinate him with undercooked chicken. He'd probably attached one of those ridiculous GIFs he was always finding, something animated and silly that was meant to make me laugh.

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I outlived the buggers." Memorable Quotes "Scattered showers my ass!" Noah. "I have no problem with you talking to yourself as long as it doesn't turn into an argument" Woody Allen. "If at first you don't succeed try, try again. Then quit. There's no point being a damn fool about it." W.C.Fields. "The one thing that all porn stars have in common is a dread of filming the scenes that don't involve sex" Fanny Lightfoot (Porn Movie Director) "For every human problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

I had to go crazy and hump a random guy before it stopped. Her: oh geez! I need to award myself with gold, aren't I amazing? (Teary laughing emoji) Me: (bored) get a life and get married. Her: when there are so many cocks to try? Never! (Extreme laughing) But don't worry, your package may or may not contain anything sexual and shocking. Just remember to take a pic of your expression and send it to me, I have to see. Me: if it's a stupid thing, don't ever come back to Washington or you're screwed!

“What’s the most confusing way a girl could break up with someone?” “I don’t know, but I sure do hope it doesn’t happen to me,” Fabian said with a chuckle. I got excited to share my lame joke, so I spun in my seat as far as the seat belt would let me so I could see him better. “Leaving a note on your old car she borrowed saying, ‘this isn’t working.’”

The room went dead quiet when I said I would take the prize, but that quiet did not last. A second later, laughter thundered through the air. Lily Smith was the loudest, doubling over with tears streaming from her eyes. "How else could she be the top seller?" she cackled. "A woman like her has to have skin as thick as a rhino." I ignored her snide comments and kept my cool. "Just to be clear," I said, "since the company so generously 'rewarded' me with bathroom duty, that's all I'll be doing for the next three days. Everything else is off my plate."

I joked lightly, and Serin rolled his eyes at my poor excuse of one. "Funny," he said humorlessly. I only cackled even harder. "No, seriously. You should step out of the corporate world and become a comedian with jokes like that." "Aw, come on, Serin." I followed him out of the house and into the backyard, where he walked out for some fresh air. "It was kind of funny, admit it!" "You need to admit yourself into a mental hospital with jokes like that." ###

When discussing potential new marketing strategies, he quipped, “Maybe we should hire a comedian to be our spokesperson. At least then, even if people don’t believe us, they’ll be entertained.” The room erupted in laughter again, and while the suggestion was light-hearted, it sparked a serious discussion about how they could use humor and a positive image to rebuild their brand. Ideas flowed more freely, and what had seemed like insurmountable problems began to look more like challenges that could be tackled with the right approach.