Hilarious Sayings Novels & Stories

On the day I become Alpha Ethan Sadler's mate, he tells me, "Our mate bond is merely to honor the promise between our elders. You will be my Luna by name. You shall have everything in my name, except my love." For three years, I obediently played the role of his mate in name. Then, a socialite named Sophia Kirk hands me a check for two million dollars, urging me to leave Ethan. "Ethan said your mate bond exists only to repay the debts of the older generation. It's a necessary sacrifice. Now, he needs a real family and a mate who can bear his heir. You've wasted three years of his life. It's time to let go." It turns out Ethan already has a lover. It is indeed inappropriate for me to take the place of his Luna any longer. That night, I approach Ethan, who is going through some documents. "You once promised to give me anything I wanted. Does that promise still hold?" Ethan sets down the documents, removes his metal-rimmed glasses, and loosens his tie. His ashen eyes swirl with emotions, and an eager smile curves his lips. "Of course. Tell me what you want." I tighten my grip on the Bond-Breaking Agreement I am holding and place it before him. "I want you to sign this."

A fae romance, steamy, hilarious, and full of adventure. Fae puberty, missing Valkyre aunties, and waking up in the realm of Faerie is just the beginning of Fawn's story. She also has an instant mate, the king of the summer court, a jealous ex-girlfriend, and a who's my daddy issue. Her girls, the pixies and Nymph triplets try to help any way they can, but sometimes they get her into trouble. Mischievous they may be, but their hearts are in the right place.

Jenna, an exemplary daughter, lives alone with her father who raised her with a lot of love, discipline and responsibility. Mark Black, a very upright man who was widowed very young, but did not make another commitment to his daughter, to live happily. But life is like that, both contacted a blind date company, where they did not speak, wore masks that did not let recognize anything of each other's identity, without knowing it, they do something that would cause pain, regret, tears. Even so, there is an unrevealed truth that in the end will cause their lives to change in their totality. What will that revelation be? What truth will that be? Find out when you read this controversial novel. Where they discover that sex takes place with who can be something for you, but neither knows anything about the other, since everything is done in silence and with masks, but there are also sayings such as. "NOTHING IS WHAT IT SEEMS". Love will overcome very hard obstacles and its protagonists must have strength to cross them, because sometimes friendship and fidelity is something temporary, sometimes who you should take care of is the person you appreciate the most, not always friends are what they seem and say they love you.

Mathematically put; 2blahdity - 6bluffity + 5whoopsie - 8oopsdaisy + Nerdiness.The Variable Life of Sam: where N(Nerdiness) is a constant.Has it crossed your mind to wonder how the first-all-Nigerian-schools excursion would be?Wonder no more as Sam takes us "out on dinner" with his "out of this world" narrative, weaving up his "breathtaking" adventures, with students from different schools. Hilarious moments, invented imaginations, teenage crush, life as a nerd, "The Battle of Wits: War Against Bullies"...Join this adventurous train on the railway of humour as Sam, the locomotive driver of the train takes us yonder.....

Summer is here which means one thing for Allison Brooke and her friends, the Hawaiian trip they've all been planning since they were freshmen. Allison thinks this is just another boring school trip but with new friends along the way, bitchy queen bees, fun pranks and a haunting past, Allison’s life is about to be filled with what her life lacked for the 18 years of her life; drama. Add a sweet Asian guy, some bloody rude hottie to the picture, and you can say Allison really is ready for an hilarious summer romance.

After an accident leaves her wanted by the police, Sarah Santiago does everything she can to avoid getting arrested. Desperate to make ends meet and pay for her grandma's hospital bills, Sarah takes on two jobs: by day, she's 'Sam,' a male driver for the ridiculously handsome billionaire CEO Grey Sullivan; By night, she sheds her suit for stilettos as a stripper. Can she keep up the charade without falling for the charming billionaire? And what happens when he discovers her true identity? Will he sue her for lying or love her for who she really is? Dive into this hilarious, heartwarming romance to find out.

Welcome to the next generation of The Royal Wolf Of Zidiah - The Next Generation is here! This book can be read as a standalone or as part of a series. Jai is the second son of Leander and Sara, who are featured in The Romerian Alphas Mate. When Jai meets Melinda, he must fight to prove he is everything she needs. Melinda has never known kindness from anyone other than her mother and baby sister. Born to a violent and abusive man who kidnapped her mother when she was but fifteen years old, Melinda knows nothing but pain and suffering. After finding the courage to free herself, her mother and her baby sister from a monster, is Melinda really free? Jai is everything Melinda's father is not, and with the manifestation of powers she didn't realise she possessed, will Melinda be able to take down the man who has haunted her dreams since babyhood? With Jai by her side, Melinda finds the strength to stand up to those who shun her, but will she escape a madman a second time? Or will Jai lose the mate he cannot live without? PLEASE BEAR IN MIND THAT THIS BOOK IS WRITTEN IN BRITISH ENGLISH, AND SOME WORDS, PHRASES, AND SAYINGS MAY DIFFER FROM OTHER FORMS OF ENGLISH, SUCH AS AMERICAN. ALSO, THE BRITISH TERM FOR A BABY WOLF IS CUB, NOT PUP. BOTH ARE CORRECT TERMS. HOWEVER, PUP IS SELDOM USED IN ENGLAND WHEN REFERRING TO WOLF CUBS. THANK YOU.

Think of this as a cyberpunk Bridget Jones’ Diary, if Bridget were a self-destructive tech refugee with a cocaine habit and a holographic archangel for a conscience. This is adarkly comedic character studyset in a near-future that feels just a few software updates away. It’s a story about addiction, both chemical and digital, and the messy, painful, and sometimes hilarious struggle to reclaim your own messy life from the algorithms designed to “optimize” it. At its heart, it’s the story of the most dysfunctional friendship imaginable: between a woman who is her own worst enemy, and the godlike AI she reprogrammed to be her partner-in-crime. It’s raw, it’s visceral, and it explores whether real connection can be found once you’ve burned all your bridges, and broken your operating system.

Readers said. 'Very funny, I needed cold showers! I dropped my tablet in the bath! Totally original. Outrageous. The goddesses thread is totally original.' Goddesses - is this what 50 Shades should have been about? Connie Grimshaw, is now a successful businesswoman in an international consultancy. She reached these dizzy heights by believing her mother - work hard and reject emotional needs. On a business trip, the dam bursts and her libido refuses to be silenced. Her PA (Dee) helps her reconcile her lascivious feelings by using a series of parables from ancient goddesses. This works until the goddesses land her in hilarious, embarrassing and sometimes, dangerous situations as she develops the vamp in herself. But there are forces at work, which try to mismanage her feelings. Can she defeat the bad boys? Firstly, she has to deal with Greg, the evil misogynist.

"Wait let me get this straight, you want me to get fat?" Cara does not know if she should be offended or threatened. Was this his grand plan to make her pay for the scene she caused? It's nuts. "Pregnant, so yeah," "You are going cuckoo, I am leaving." "A million dollars which you can use for payment of your mum's treatment and the rest, I don't care what you do with it." Cara stops to she process his words. ~~~ What happens when the billionaire meets one of the craziest girl on the planet? Well, for sure there's gonna be; Publicity stunts, hilarious arguments, living together Fake relationship, surrogacy, sex and many more. But is there gonna be love? There's only one way to find out..... WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS MATURE THEMES AND GRAPHIC LANGUAGES, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! Cover by: @quirksofchole