Funny Condom Sayings

"Ang tanga-tanga mo naman, Hailey! Bakit ka nagpabuntis? Sa ating dalawa ikaw pa nga itong mahinhin. Di makabasag pinggan. Ikaw ‘yong dalagang Filipina, yeah!" hindi napigilan ang galit na sita niya sa kakambal. Problema. Iyon kaagad ang sumagi sa isip ni Callie nang malamang buntis ang ni kakambal niyang si Hailey. Bukod sa hindi nito masabi kung sino ang tatay ay mahina ang puso nito, kaligtasan kaagad nito ang naisip niya. Gustuhin man niya itong sabunutan dahil sa taglay na kagagahan ay hindi na lang niya ginawa. Sa mapaglarong tadhana, sa kakahanap niya sa Tatay ng anak nito ay natuklasan niyang ang multi millionaire na si Carter Hyun ang nakadisgrasiya dito. Natagpuan na lang niya ang sarili na siya na ang Mommy ng baby nito. Magkakasama sila sa iisang bubong, mapigilan niya kaya kung may pag-ibig na umusbong?

"Now you listen. You are mine. Your whole existence is mine. You live for me. Breathe for me. Exist for me. If I tell you to do something. You do it. No questions asked. If I tell you to jump off a building, I want no hesitation from you. I am the master and you are my slave. Do you get me?" Isabella Russo lost her parents to a car crash when she was just eight years old, she moves to Italy to live with her father's sister. 10 years later, she finds out that she was given off to the Perez Mafia family as collateral. What will happen when Capo Domenico Perez comes to take what's his? In a bid to make him fall for her, will she succeed? Or would she find herself falling for the dangerous capo with no one to catch her.

Martyr na kung tawagin pero kayang gawin lahat ni Zhang para lang sa lalaking minamahal niya kahit na pilit siyang tinataboy nito. Hindi lingid sa kaalaman ni Zhang na takaw gulo si Zech, kaya hangga't maari ay gumagawa siya ng paraan para mapabuti ito at mabawasan ang pagiging suki nito sa Detention Office. Hanggang saan nga ba aabot ang pasensya at pagmamahal ni Zhang para kay Zech? Sapat na ba ito para manatili siya sa tabi ng nasabing lalaki kahit na makailang beses na siyang sinaktan at binalewala?

Leila, a young Austrian aristocrat and student in Classics, is drawn into a world of conspiracy and danger when her aunt is involved in a suspicious car accident. Leila travels to her aunt’s chalet to take care of her husky, but soon discovers a body in the drawing room. Terrified, she runs out and bumps into Dick, a nosy English banker who becomes entangled in the mystery. When they return to the drawing room, the body has disappeared. Leila takes the husky for a walk and discovers that the body has been moved to a house recently purchased by another branch of her family. She finds a notebook with encrypted entries in the drawing room and uses her linguistic skills to decode them. She discovers the initials, address, and phone number of someone involved in the plot. Leila calls the number and is warned against getting involved. Undeterred, she discovers a bizarre research center where a conference on German mystical past is taking place.She suspects that there is a bizarre cult operating underground. Leila learns about their plan to topple every democracy in Europe. The cult is after an artifact that may be hidden in her aunt’s chalet. However, this is only the tip of the iceberg. Leila discovers that the aristocratic cult members are pawns in a larger game. They are unknowingly being manipulated to cause disruption in the European banking system using an AI virus.The chaos will cause turmoil in the Euro zone. As Leila and her aunt race against time to stop the virus from being unleashed, they uncover an even more shocking truth: Leila’s own family members are part of the conspiracy. With betrayal and danger at every turn, Leila must use all of her wit to outsmart the cult.

Nate Wilson is a hot guy who is every girl's wet dream. In an attempt to get over his best friend who is married, he takes an impulsive decision. Samantha Perez is a fiesty and confident young woman who lives the perfect life. She breaks her rule for one night, letting herself go loose but is she really as wild as she seems between the sheets? One crazy night of pleasure brings these two people together but little did they know that they weren't going to be just strangers after all. Read to find out what life has in store for these two imperfect souls.

Heiress Jovie Wimberly has a stealing problem. She steals from stores, people, and even her parents. When she's sent to group therapy to get to the root of her issue, she doesn't count on stealing Reno's heart. Reno Valenzuela has a gambling problem. He's lost all his money to casinos, horse races and ridiculous bets. What he doesn't bet on is falling head over heels for Jovie. When Reno's debt catches up with him and Jovie decides to leave her fiance, they head on a cross country trip to save Reno's life. With hitmen and Jovie's fiancé after them, they embark on a crime-filled, life changing journey that might actually change them for the better. Will the hitmen get to Reno? Will Jovie's fiancé bring her back home? Should they have just stayed in group therapy?

Angel Loves Her Life. She Has A Family, Friends And Her Boyfriend, But When She Meets Zhul Alexis, She Realizes Something Has Been Missing. Their Meeting Was The Start Of The New Something

"There Are THREE SIDES To Every Story. YOURS, HIS And The TRUTH."We both hold distaste for the other. We're both clouded by their own selfish nature. We're both playing the blame game. It won't end until someone admits defeat. Until someone decides to call it quits. But how would that ever happen? We're are just as stubborn as one another.Only one thing would change our resolution to one another. An Engagement. .......An excerpt -" To be honest I have no interest in you. ", he said coldly almost matching the demeanor I had for him, he still had a long way to go through before he could be on par with my hatred for him. He slid over to me a hot cup of coffee, it shook a little causing drops to land on the counter. I sighed, just the sight of it reminded me of the terrible banging in my head. Hangovers were the worst. We sat side by side in the kitchen, disinterest, and distaste for one another high. I could bet if it was a smell, it'd be pungent."I feel the same way. " I replied monotonously taking a sip of the hot liquid, feeling it burn my throat. I glanced his way, staring at his brown hair ruffled, at his dark captivating green eyes. I placed a hand on my lips remembering the intense scene that occurred last night. I swallowed hard. How? I thought. How could I be interested?I was in love with his brother.

Natasha is always bullied because of her old-fashioned look. Clyde del Espania, the man of her dreams is the opposite. He is so good-looking and one of the heirs of the Dynasty Agency. She believes that Clyde will also notice her one day. She knows that she isn't exactly beautiful. Sometimes, they'd even call her weird, but she doesn't give them the chance to get inside her head that much. She is certain that the drop-dead gorgeous man, Clyde del Espania, will be hers with the help of the love potions written in her grandmother's book. What could happen if the enchantment that she has been anticipating always failed because of Kyle del Espania, the guy that she dislikes so much who also happens to be Clyde's twin brother? He knows how hard she loves his twin brother so he decides to help her in order for Clyde to notice her and fall for her. The guy also has a different goal for doing so as the girl that he loves is now engaged with his twin brother. But how could they continue with the plan if she is the one who seems to be enchanted by her love's twin brother? What if Kyle turns out to be the guy that she truly loves? Will she be successful in enchanting him to fall for her instead when he still loves his ex, Claire?

"Ang tanga mo dahil minahal mo ang kaaway mo!" - Mina "Yes, I'm stupid! However... I'll never regret it because I love her. This love is too risky as I let someone pointing a loaded gun into my heart and hoping she won't pull the trigger." - Cooper Si Claire Mina ay isang espiya na inupahan ng Amethyst Company upang tiktikan ang kaaway, ang Yu Company. Una ay tumanggi siya dahil sa mga panganib sa misyon ngunit binantaan siya ng CEO ng Amethyst Company kaya walang magawa kundi ang sumunod. Upang matagumpay na makapasok sa Yu Company, kailangang lapitan ni Claire si Cooper Yu, ang CEO ngunit nabalitaan sa black market na si CEO Copper ang mysterious Mafia Boss na ang libangan ay pumatay. There's no way Claire didn't know that dahil siya ay isang taong lumaki sa black market. Itinaya ni Claire ang kanyang buhay sa misyon na ito pero hindi nagtagumpay at siya ay nahuli.To survive she has to escape but she accidentally made a stupid plan, magpanggap na siya ay nabuntis ng CEO. Gayunpaman, nang walang tamang ebidensiya at interogasyon tungkol sa kanyang tunay na pagkakakilanlan, ang CEO na si Cooper Yu ay handang panagutan ang responsibilidad at gawing asawa niya si Claire. Naloko ba ng kanyang kalokohang plano ang henyo at walang awa na Mafia Boss? Ano ang mangyayari kung malalaman ni Cooper Yu ang intensyon ni Claire? Does Claire make this mission accomplished or be killed?