Funny Filipino Quotes Novels & Stories

Habang kumakain, panay ang hirit ni Nathan ng jokes. "Alam mo ba kung anong sabi ng donut sa kape?" Napatingin si Thalia sa kanya. "Ano?" "Hindi kita kayang ‘espresso’ kung gaano kita ka-gusto." Napangiwi si Thalia. "Kadiri, Nathan! Ang corny!" Pero natawa pa rin siya.

Dinner was loud. Filipino-loud. Grant-family-loud. Chaos-loud. My titas sat at one side of the long table speaking rapid Filipino, mixing English every two seconds. “Tyler, ang gwapo mo nung nag-propose si Mason. (Tyler, you were so handsome when Mason proposed.)” “Umiyak ka pa nga! (You even cried!)” “Pareho kayo umiyak! (You both cried!)” “Ang cheesy n’yo. (You’re both so cheesy.)”

Siguro may naalala siyang best memories o nakakatawang katangahan niya kaya siya ganiyan? Hehe joke lang po! 'Yung mga kasamahan ko na failed din, nasa labas at nagsisimula na. Samantalang ako, nandito kinakausap itong matandang 'to na pangiti-ngiti lang na akala mo kinakausap o nagpapatawa ang baso ng kapeng hinahalo niya. Pinatawag niya 'ko at akala ko may sasabihin siyang kung ano. Pero ang tanging ginagawa niya lang ay ang ngumiti habang naghahalo ng kape.

Pagkukwento ko at nagsitawanan naman sila. Knythe gave me a glass of tequila and asked, “mahirap ba turuan si Bullet?” I drank it first before answering, “yes and no. No, because he's a fast-learner. Yes, because he's so stubborn! Napakatigas ng ulo. Manang-mana sa pinagmanahan.” Iiling-iling na tugon ko at natawa naman siya. Hindi ko alam kung nakailang tanong pa sila. I don't know how many glasses I've drank but I somehow feel funny. Kumunot ang noo ko at tumingin sa dulo.

sagot niya agad. Hearing those words made Euphie grin viciously. She looked up to the guy and said, “I really don't get it. Why do Filipinos have to apologize for something that we didn't really do? Called Ignorant, Pathetic and Reckless by people like you for some small damn reason, when the only thing we do was to welcome and treat you foreigners right better than we supposed to deserve.”

Mahina subalit may diin sa bawat katagang binanggit ko. Mas lalo pang nangunot ang kanyang noo matapos niyang maproseso sa kanyang utak ang lahat ng aking sinabi.Subalit maya-maya lang ay pagak na itong tumawa. "This is an Italian restaurant! So, ano ang ini-expect mo? Maghain sila ng Filipino dish at Delight Yoghurt drink?" Sarkastiko niyang saad na pawang pang-iinsulto ang naging dating saakin.

the host laughed "And then for those who bashed my husband, don't judge him, I'll admit that I was angry with him but when I found out the reason it disappeared, I even blamed myself more why I let him go the one who knows better when it comes to cooking, everyone said that my husband is useless and that I should divorce him, that won't happen! Will I tie the knot if I don't love my husband? Then I will accept everything from him, I can only ask, is there a perfect person?" Kino looked at the host and laughed "Ay nako sympre wala Mr. Fugo" Kino smiled while I was laughing like crazy and excited, this channel is nationwide, it even has an English translation at the bottom.

I passed them and heard them arguing again "You're really stupid, you almost said it, I'm really going to hate you there" "Because you called me stupid, you are stupider than me" I had a hard time opening the lock of my condo because I was suppressing my laughter, when I got inside I let out my laughter Shut up! I dropped my things on the sofa and immediately went to the kitchen, I opened the cabinets There and took out a piece of pancit Canton I'm hungry but my body is too tired to cook for so long and so many processed foods, that's why I go for the second choice which is pancit Canton--- spicy

Bestfriend ko pa rin naman 'to noh! Halatang naiilang siya. "Wag ka mag-alala wala naman na sakin yun, pre! Kaya wag ka ng mailang diyan! Daig mo pa babae, eh! Tingnan mo si Pat hindi naman siya naiilang, pwede naman na tayong magka-kaibigan diba?" Ako. Bigla siyang ngumiti ng malawak. Habang halatang nagulat naman si Quaine ng mabanggit ko ang pangalan nito.

This is an insult to me. I grinned. "Cheap country? Aren't you aware that your country's massive producer of Gold is in the Philippines? And also pearls? Just because our language is not English you will already insult our country. Why? Do you feel too high because you're American? Aren't you being racist? For a person who works with Government, you are a fool and filthy and narrow-minded being that can't think about what's right and wrong. You have no difference from Homo Sapiens." I answer here. "You better quit your job and just work with all English people, or better be, a cavewoman. You're good at that."