Funny Markiplier Novels & Stories

12:00 pm .. A small smirk played on Uncle Mark's lips as he watched the press conference on TV. He picked up the remote , turned off the TV , picked up his phone and called his Ally. "Good job" he said to him immediately he picked up his call . "Thank you " His ally replied. "Xavier isn't that smart , just seat back and watch him worry over nothing" uncle Mark said and they both laughed. "Make sure to continue adding issues , Fred mustn't back down "

Memes mocking his antics flooded social media, with one meme showing him chasing a giant floating pickle with the caption, "Gregory, the Pickle Chaser." ‌ In a last-ditch effort, Gregory hired a team of buzzers to flood the internet with positive stories about him. They posted glowing testimonials, fabricated heartwarming anecdotes, and even created fake fan clubs dedicated to his greatness. ‌ But the internet was having none of it. Commenters responded with sarcastic comments like, "Wow, Gregory's fan club must consist of his mirror and his pet llama." ***

His lips quivered, and widened his eyes to make him look like a sad kitty. I inwardly rolled my eyes and groaned. "Can you not act like that and be an adult? Or else I will hurt you." "Hey, Liam, right?" Mark directed his attention to Liam, ignored my threat, and made me snarl. "Was Lily rowdy with you? My little chipmunk may be small, but she can be a bit on the violent side." "Mark!" I started throwing my fist at him, and he dodged every one of them with ease; laughing it off just annoyed me.

I managed to ask. He pulls away and I just crack up. “ What’s so funny?” Mark asks and I laugh harder. I am holding my sides and have tears running down my face. Tank turns his head but I see his shoulders shaking. I can stop to answer him. Mark is looking at me like I have lost my mind. Viper puts him out of his misery and confusion. “ Dude, Songbird is Lilly.” Viper laughs. “ For real?” Mark asks, dropping his jaw. I am gasping for air from laughing and almost roll out of the chair if Tank hadn’t caught me.

Mark looked over with an easy grin when the timer in the kitchen went off. "Pizza!" They both said together as they exploded off the couch to race into the kitchen. Tad grabbed the hot pads and got the pizza out while Mark got the plates and round pizza cutter. "Dude, I'm so hungry I would eat a dick," Mark said with a laugh as he rolled the cutter across the pizza. Tad laughed it off because they always said funny things like that. "You wouldn't eat a dick, you like Rachel's pussy too much." Mark gave an uneasy laugh. "Nah, we broke up."

“Thirty years old and still getting pantsed like a high-school loser. This is why you’ll never get promoted, Mark. You’re not hero material. You’re not even sidekick material. You’re the fucking joke we keep around to feel better about ourselves.” I tried to pull my pants up. He kicked my hands away. “Nah. Stay there. Maybe if you stand like that long enough, one of the girls will take pity and suck you off. Right, Sarah?” She laughed harder than the rest. “In his dreams.” The sounds of their laughter all narrowed down to a beeping sound. All I saw was red.

He muses. "An abomination! For that bastard! How dare she!" He yells before suddenly throwing his head back and laughing. "But- it!." He's laughing so hard that he has to take a steadying hold on the wall. "But it's dead! Isn't that amazing!" He practically yells at the frozen couple. They could only blink in shock as they watched Mark crow and cackle like a madman. Claire finally breaks out of her stupor. She honestly thought that Mark was going to brutally murder them for endangering Leia's life. She never expected that he would be pleased, much less euphoric over it.

“Three Stooges, huh? You better be glad that Thomas and Brandon didn’t hear you call us that. They don’t have a sense of humor like I do.” We turned around to see Mark leaning up against the back of one of the couches in our lobby with a smirk on his face. If I were a normal woman, I would call him handsome, but I haven’t been normal for years, so it came across as more arrogant than anything. The more I’m around Bri, the better I like her. She is a hilarious little firecracker, and I am so here for it. “You have a sense of humor that couldn’t even make Elmo laugh, Mark. Why are you bothering us?” The twinkle in her eyes told me that she didn’t believe what she was saying, but it made me chu

Aileen said wryly. Mark laughed out loud at the sight of her getting upset over his little joke. “Wow. No need, Miss. All you have to do is say your vows of faithfulness for life, and all the bills will be paid off along with the interest. In fact, you can get a lifetime guarantee bonus to be picked up by me everywhere,” Mark said with a hilarious expression. This made Aileen laugh and forget her anger. ***

The dryness and burning sensation seemed to choke him mercilessly—without pause. On the other end, Rick’s long sigh could be heard. “Mark, please. Where are you? Do you want me to come see you?” The words were sincere. Worried. But instead of answering, Mark burst into laughter. A bitter laugh that erupted with a thousand reasons he deemed perfectly reasonable at that moment. Because it might be the only escape left for someone who had been holding back the suffocation for too long, whose world had long since collapsed in silence. More accurately, he was laughing at his own life.