Grumpy Old Men Bloopers Novels & Stories

"We kept it to remember you by. Now your baby can have it. Fucking hell. Is someone cutting onions or something?" Grandma Lily smiled at us, "congratulations Storm and Aeryn. A great-grandchild. What a blessing." Mom chuckled, "you’re fucking old now. Great-grandparents." Grandma April looked at Mom like she was going to kill her. "We’re not that old!" Grandpa Os shrugged, as if he didn't care that people thought he was old. "I can still beat most of you in a sparring match." "Age is just a fucking number." Grandpa Cy added, "and we’re not going anywhere any time soon."

All three of them were linebackers on the football team, big hulking boys who were probably more accurately described as men now. "Not much." Brent grinned and held out a fist to be pounded. "Gimp here's having trouble keeping up. I was just gonna give him a hand." The glee in his voice was unmistakable, and my earlier mad boiled back to the surface. "Just leave me the fuck alone." All three of them hooted with laughter. "Oooooh, gimp's got a gutter mouth now, huh? Dude, we're just trying to give you a hand." Karl shoved at my back, sending me skittering as I tried to keep my balance.

The elderly man possessed bright eyes, spotting a field of gray hair on his aged scalp, his forehead covered in uneven wrinkles which went to show the turbulent life he had lived up to this point, but one look at him and you could tell the wisdom and class with which he lived. "You know you have a foot in the grave yet you still do something as silly as missing your check ups" the old man laughed. That's quite a thing to say to an old man, you sure have become more daring. "How've been my boy, you seem to be doing quite well, eh?" "Yeah, but I can't say the same for you Grandpa" Ben quipped. They both smiled tenderly at each other. "How's your company doing?" he asked "I heard you acquired a

the taller one mocked the helpless, old man. "Where?! I'm scared! Get me out of here!" screamed the old man, hysterically. But he just got laughed in return. "Absolutely crazy," the taller man, chuckled. Before they turned their backs, the shortest fellow left a spit on the old man's face, followed by a laughter. 'How rude!' Méah's mind yelled. After those ruthless jerks left, Méah found herself in front of the old man who gave her a terrified expression as though he had seen a literal ghost.

It’s up to him if he still wanted to help them or not. Celine was worried on how the old man will react when she heard his hearty laugh. She could see tears from his eyes by laughing so hard that she was worried he might have a heart attack. “I’m flattered that you see me like that” the old man said when he recovered from his laugh. “Well, you’re very handsome and still fit for an 80-year-old. I had to be clear” Celine pouted which earned another laugh. “70” the doctor corrected.

He looked at the Old man but couldn't catch his eye Marcus bellowed in laughters that it seemed it could be heard downstairs and the screaming, the mourning of the lost and cracking of fire and order for order would stop for a moment For a moment, the three men watched him wondering what was funny in all the young man said. Then Marcus looked at them disappointed why they weren't laughing to

He looked at Granger as though he was a joke and pointed his free index finger on the photo. “Seriously? This old man?” Matthew asked with suppressed laughter as he shot a glance at the photo of an old man wearing a jacket and round cap. The old man looked at the lens as though he was looking at the most notorious man on earth. Granger nodded in response, compelling him to laugh more–his laughter that echoed the entire silent floor. The confidence in Granger’s face instantly turned into confusion mixed with a face that signified a person who was insulted.

“It’s not funny!” “I’m not laughing at your predicament. I’m laughing at the ‘pompous rich old fart,’” he assured me. “Don’t tell me you don’t know a few.” I sounded grumpy. I was. Damn Ike and these shoes! “Will!” A boisterous voice broke through the chatter as we finally made it to the top of the stairs. Sure enough, a balding, red-faced man in his seventies with a woman who could have been his granddaughter dangling off his arm came pushing through the crowd.

Come on, I'll take three shots as punishment—consider it a toast to you and Macy! Todd stood to the side, his expression shifting between anger and panic. He stared at me intently, as if I were the cheating wife, the disgust in his eyes practically spilling over. Looking at the bunch of fools in front of me, I couldn't even be bothered to be angry. I turned my head and glanced at Terrence. He'd worked under Dad for 20 years. There was no way he'd be able to tolerate anyone insulting me like this. He suddenly raised his hand, about to slap Miguel across the face.

another elderly person, one with a goatee, exclaimed. “Besides, this is a family problem! You…” Slap! Harvey slapped that man away. “A little harsh?” “Aaagh!” The elderly person with a goatee screamed in pain. The remaining elders were about to stand up as well, but they immediately stopped when they saw Harvey being so vicious. They had no choice but to step back and lift the others up. “You’re lawless! You’re completely lawless!” they exclaimed with trembling voices, all the while furiously pointing at Harvey.