Really Dark Humor Jokes Novels & Stories

Marcus said, matter of fact. Derek laughed, “ohhhhhh no! Rest in peace bachelor pad.” “Yeah so, about that, you’ll live without me for a few hours, won’t you,” I said, punching Derek in the shoulder. “Yeah yeah I guess, someone will have to hold me and tell me I’m pretty,” Derek said, hugging Marcus in a dramatic fashion. “You’re so not my type but maybe if you grew a beard, you have potential,” Marcus said, not even looking up from his screen.

Both of them travel to their first destination, a breakpoint that has a white blood-covered tent. This selected breakpoint is home to the one called Butcher. Both a name was given to him and an occupation that the dark elf is a master in. Inside this tent is a worn and torn table right in the middle and behind him are metal racks of shelves. In these storage spaces are glass jars that have organs inside them. These are wolf parts. There are countless jars on the rack with hearts, lungs, and other vital parts to make the mammal tick and live. A dark elf stumbles his way inside the tent. He wears the uniform armor that most of Malakai’s army has on, the scout metal suit though he does not have

Especially since she had a ten year old to take care of. Unfortunately for her, it was not her alarm clock that woke her up on that day. It was the boisterous sound of her ringing phone. She let out an irritated sound before placing the phone to her ears. “What’s up old man? It's too early for your call!" She complained. The person on the other side or the phone didn't bother to even acknowledge the joke as he went directly to the point. ‘What do you think you are doing exposing Hanna like that to the world? You know the kind of work we do and why she should be kept away from the public.'

“Eh, not really. No.” He sighed. “A mortician walks into a bar-” “Formaldehyde is the punchline, isn't it?” “Stop ruining my jokes, you wretch.” I vaguely noticed his temper. “Tea,” he said darkly. “I need tea.” “Heh heh. Tea. T.” “Silence, Shannon.”

Leesa had to give the guy credit. He didn’t seem to let the catcalls and groans bother him. He either had the thickest skin in the world, or he thought the derision was in some twisted way an approval of his act. His jokes were new, but were equally as dumb as the last time. She wondered if he wrote the stuff himself or got it from some website—stupidjokes.com, maybe.

I’m satisfied with my train of thought until I saw someone in the room. The man is talking. I want to say that I can’t hear anything and I don’t understand what he’s saying cause my head is also spinning but… how should I tell him? He started to say his words through actions and I tried hard not to laugh because his face is also changing. He bent his head and put his hands forward while slouching, the most hilarious thing is that he let his iris upward, acting like a zombie. Then I laughed.

Jon admits. “You know what? I don’t either.” I open my eyes, looking around the dark room. I can’t see Jon, and even if I roll over and look him in the eyes, his expression will be hard to read. It doesn’t make sense, but there’s something safe about the dark. It hides the truth, and sometimes the truth hurts. “I say things like that with sarcasm and dark humor, but it’s not really funny, is it?” “Sometimes you laugh so you don’t cry.”

With nothing in mind, he laughed shamelessly! "Hahahaha! Fucking idiots, you two! Hahaha!" "You two are Idiots? How come you have to wear that! That is the wearing clothes of female animals! Hahaha!" "I don't know my friend is this Idiot Haha! Haha!" Dick mocked this out loudly while laughing. Of course he knew to the core about Darkness having him wear that clothes! "....." The "two idiots" which Dick called is boiling from anger. "Oh, oh!" Dick exclaimed.

she giggled at her own joke. Guila’s giggle rippled through the air, a moment of levity amidst the heavy atmosphere. Her joke, bizarre and unexpected, painted a vivid picture in my mind. I couldn’t help but smile at her words, the image she conjured absurdly amusing. It was as if, even in the darkest moments, she managed to find a glimmer of humor, a ray of light that pierced through the shadows.

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.