Sexy Jokes Novels & Stories

someone yelled. "I won’t shut up until someone answers!" Lucas shouted back, clearly enjoying the attention. "We don’t know and we don’t care, so shut the hell up, Lucas!" another voice barked. "Wrong! It’s called Lemon-aid! Get it? Like the drink?" The groan this time was even louder. "Dad jokes are never, ever funny," Elodie muttered, shaking her head.

The dark humor was so perfectly Jaxx that I couldn't help but laugh. I burst out laughing, the sound bright against the lingering tension in the room. The absurdity of his grim humor never failed to catch me off guard, to remind me that beneath the violence and the control, there was a man who made me laugh in the darkest moments. Jaxx just shrugged, completely unbothered by his own dark wit, though a small smile played at his lips, softening the hard lines of his face.

Then, I heard the rustle of sheets and a soft, feminine giggle in the background. "Come on, little bro," Jason chuckled, the sound grating against my raw nerves. "Calm down. I was just trying to release a sperm. Who knows, I might get an heir soon." My jaw dropped. I stared at the phone in disbelief. "You can't relate, right?" I shouted, my voice cracking. "What the f**k Jason? I am sitting in a car, shaking, and you're making jokes about heirs?" "Relax, Mark. What do you want?"

-I would prefer that what was in my mouth was your saliva, but I'll have to be content with this until you crawl and go back to tack me like a bitch in heat. I widened my eyes. Were all the jokes from now on to have sexual overtones? -You're a pig, idiot- I stuck out my tongue at him, making his smile grow a few sizes larger. -Do you know what you can do with that little pink tongue of yours? Suck my ... -G! - I screamed interrupting him.- Stop being a pig.

"Yeah.. shit I'm sorry.. here's a paper that tells you what you should do." I looked at the paper and started reading it. But then Shit.... I furrowed my brows, "this paper literally says "what you should do... "" "I know..." I smiled, "ahh.. I get the joke.." She nodded a bit, "yep.. that was the joke." This was awkward as fuck! If it was four years ago this would have been funny as fuck.. but now this shit was just awkward. I laughed a bit, "umh yeah it's funny.."

He laughed. "That means you must have forgotten about it, and that's disappointing." Citrus acted to be sad. "You should remember that night, you have to." "I never did that shit, bro. I don't do man stuff." "We can do that again, I'm pretty sure you'll remember it this time." He said and Denver rolled his eyes. "Jennifer is gonna have you dead in a second." He joked. "Then we're gonna have it all three of us." "Guys, come on. Geez." I couldn't hold the laughter anymore, and they were not looking like they'd stop. If I don't stop them any sooner, my ribs would probably be broken any minute from now.

I tell him m with a grunt. “A joke. I understand you're sad that I want to stay away but can you refrain from calling our relationship a joke?" The chuckles turn into full blown laughter. Well someone is happy with women. Why would he not? “You are an idiot." “Okay now you are just jealous." And they laugh again. There is nothing remotely funny about this clown so I do not understand what they keep laughing at. “Can you be serious for once? I need to ask you about something."

"I'm just tired, and I need to rest." "Don't worry, I didn't hear that. I just got fucked by two men before bringing my hot ass down here. Can you believe that?" She nudged at my shoulder, laughing out loud. Benedict joined in the laughter, bending forward with one hand on the countertop, and the other hugging his abdomen. What the fuck were they laughing about? What's so funny about what she said? Since when did having a threesome become a joke? Not to look stupid among them, or to further insult the Asian I had already insulted, I joined in the laughter, clapping my hands together in a manner that made me look like a clowed idiot.

I would, too, if I had Patrick as a spouse. "How about truth or dare?" The smooching couples asked at the same time and squealed for their adequate timing. "Isn't that like for kids?" I rolled my eyes. "That would be perfect for you, wouldn't it?" I blurred out way faster than I should. "Mean!" Mike snarled before his voice died into laughter, and everyone laughed over the inappropriate joke, too, although I'd now begun to feel bad. "Oh, you got a feisty one!" The guy Harper had mesmerized said to Axel.

A message bubble lit up under his name, cheerful and oblivious. Just another one of his dry, stupid jokes—something about his dinner being so terrible he was convinced the restaurant was trying to assassinate him with undercooked chicken. He'd probably attached one of those ridiculous GIFs he was always finding, something animated and silly that was meant to make me laugh.