Short Comedy Quotes

“Did you think you could run from me, doll? Or is this just your way of testing me?" After being abandoned by her family, being sold by her godmother was the last thing Iris Paulman expected. Raised in a church in a small town, Iris’s world was one filled with faith and innocence. But when her godmother put her up for sale to clear her pending debt, Irish life takes a drastic turn. What happens when ruthless mafia lord Damon Vyon decides to buy her?

I stepped closer. Close enough to smell his cologne—cedarwood, leather, and power. My hand moved. Smooth, practiced. The pistol slide from under the apron into my palm. I raised it fast. But before I could pull the trigger— BANG. Not my shot. A scream tore through the restaurant as another man launched himself toward Romano’s table, blade flashing. Another assassin. What the hell— Romano didn’t flinch. He shoved the table forward, knocking the attacker off balance. The blade scraped across wood, not skin. I ducked instinctively as the room erupted into chaos. Gunfire cracked. Glass exploded. People screamed and dove for cover. “Get him out—NOW!” one of the guards barked. I aimed for the second attacker. Didn’t even hesitate. One shot—head. Gone. The guard saw me. Confusion flashed in his eyes. Then rage. I ran. I weaved between overturned chairs, plates, and screaming bodies. The smell of blood was real now, thick in the air. One of the guards grabbed me. I slammed my elbow into his ribs, twisted, and brought the butt of my gun down on his skull. He dropped like a sack of bricks. Out. I had to get out. My boots pounded the floor as I tore through the narrow hallway. But then— “Elisa.” His voice stopped me cold. I turned. Antonio Romano stood in the middle of the carnage, suit untouched, blood spattered behind him like art. His eyes were on me. And he was smiling. It was darker. Slower. Like a hunter seeing something worth chasing. Somehow, he knew who I was. “Interesting,” he said softly, tilting his head. “They sent you.” I didn’t answer. I ran. But that voice followed me. He knew my name. And he let me go. This wasn’t over. It had just begun.

Janessa Collins never asked for a life bound to the Mafia, but fate tied her to it the moment her father arranged her engagement to Eric Dela Cruz, the ruthless leader of the River Blood Mafia and her childhood sweetheart. Eric has built his empire with fire and blood, but his heart has always belonged to Janessa. To him, she is not just his fiancée, but his reason to keep breathing. Yet Janessa’s own heart belongs elsewhere… to Xavier, Eric’s loyal underboss, whose playful charm hides a deadly secret. Caught between a man who would burn the world for her and another who makes her feel truly alive, Janessa must navigate betrayal, forbidden love, and the shadows of power. But in the Mafia, love comes with a price and someone is always willing to collect.

Sabiana Zoreta was bought for fifteen million pesos. At the very young age of twenty, she was being bid in an elite club. She was taken there to be sold and included in an auction. Kidnapped at the age of five by her father from her wealthy known stepdad, she later questioned why he would sell her when she grew up. Could a father really sell his own child? For her father, the answer was yes. Pinalaki siya para pagkakitaan, but the man who bought her didn’t want her for just one night. He wanted her to be his lover—Lennox Montebello, the prince of the underground organization, dirty, dangerous, and dark.

“Think you can run, princess? Not in this life or the next, you’ll never escape me!” — Pedro “Please Pedro, f*cking die!” — Aelia ——— This man is obsessed with me and at the same time it’s not me he’s obsessed with, instead it’s my appearance but not mine! His deceased first love! But no matter how many times I yell “I’m not her!” He doesn’t seem to listen. He’s too consumed with owning me as a replacement for his dead lover to understand common sense! Oh, did I forget to mention that Mr. Tall, handsome and dangerous is married?! I want to escape him, I want to flee if it means going to the ends of the earth but all my attempts are futile. Even if I BEG he won’t let me go, WORSE yet, even if I BREAK! SERIES NAME: MAFIA’S PET (Vol 1)

Stuck with a drunken dad, Sera is faced with life and forced to become the breadwinner. However, despite the already struggling life, things changed when her father old acquaintance, a cold ruthless mafia king seeks her hand. With hidden secrets, double life and a scarred past, Sera has no idea what's in store for her in her new world.

𝐹𝑎𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦, 𝑣𝑒𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒, 𝑝𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑜𝑏𝑠𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑖𝑜𝑛. Azzurra Amalia Romano, an omega, bites more than she can chew when she gets herself entangled with someone she should never have messed with, by taking what doesn't belong to her but the devil. Alpha Adriano Rion Giordano was a devil in human form, a ruthless Italian werewolf mafia boss whom people tremble at the mention of his name. A man with no interest in redemption, a face like that of a Greek god but a temper like that of a raging fire, who was only driven by two things, money and power. Merciless to those standing in his way and wouldn't hesitate to put a bullet through their skull to prove a point or rip them to shreds. He doesn't give second chances and he just became Azzurra's worst nightmare. It all became painfully clear when it dawned on her that there was no way out of the Alpha's clutches. A messy entanglement that disrupted her already chaotic life, tossing her into a web of a dangerous attraction that came hand in hand with obsession, lies, revenge, heart-wrenching betrayals and death. And maybe, just maybe, the devil has feelings too, an emotion which comes with pain, making the hardest sacrifices, all at a very costly price

“I’ll take her, her tears taste nice” “The wedding holds tomorrow, I’ll come back for my bride then, bye for now” That was all the devil had to say to pull her into his dark and bloody world. His words are final , his silence speaks His presence cold and hot His aura speaks of great and might power He who rules Italy without stress Feared by the government and the people in the country He is who he thinks he is. He’s Gerald Grey. Roseanne Kent a twenty years old college student who’s hated by her father and sisters. She found herself being sold into a marriage with the most feared and most powerful mafia lord in Italy. At the mention of his name, the city stays quiet, getting on his bad side is a direct call for death. What happens when the most feared and most powerful mafia lord gets married to a mere twenty years old lady who was to sold to him as a bride for a billion dollar? What happens when Roseanne Kent finds out there’s more to Gerald Grey than what people know? What happens when the truth about Roseanne’s mother comes to light? What happens when the truth about the mystery death of Gerald Grey’s Six ex-wives is revealed?

Rising actress Kylie Klein celebrates her future by buying a luxury car for her boyfriend, only to find him cheating on her. Reeling from the shock, she finds a moment of raw connection with Ivan, a prominent businessman grieving the loss of his iconic wife, Olivia Blackwood, who died of cancer. Their shared pain leads to a kiss, a moment Kylie instantly regrets when she realizes the late actress's identity. But Ivan's public life is a dangerous lie. His legitimate business is merely a front for his powerful connection to the Mafia, and Olivia’s death was no tragedy of nature—it was a brutal act of vengeance for Ivan’s past actions. As their unlikely bond ignites a perilous love, Kylie is pulled into his world of lethal secrets. Ivan must fight a vicious war to save his empire, while Mona must decide if her love can survive the truth: that the man she is falling for, the man the world sees as a grieving businessman, is responsible for the death of the woman he claims to mourn.

My twin sister died in my arms with his name on her lips. Five years later, I wear red lipstick and heels to seduce the man who murdered her. ~ Five years ago, Anastasia’s world ended in gunfire and ash. Her entire family was slaughtered on her eighteenth birthday, by the man her twin sister loved. Left for dead, Anastasia was saved by a stranger. Broken, enraged, and alone, she was taken in by a woman who taught her how to disappear… and how to kill. Now, she’s Skye, trained to seduce, infiltrate, and destroy. Her mission is simple: get close to Nikolaus Volkov, close enough to break him. But killing him isn’t enough. She wants to make him suffer, to crave her, to need her. And when he’s completely at her mercy… she’ll rip him apart the way he tore her world to pieces. A kiss meant to disarm ignites something deadly, Desire. Obsession. Confusion. Nikolaus is not the cold-blooded monster she expected. He’s worse. And yet, with every stolen glance and kiss, Skye begins to slip. Revenge was the plan. Desire was never part of it. Now, she’s playing a game she might not win. Under Her Skirt: The Last Kiss is a dark, twisted mafia romance of seduction, revenge, and ruin, where every kiss could be a betrayal… and every heartbeat could be your last.