Snake Jokes Novels & Stories

She snickered, yelled in a high pitched tone and kicked. *skreeee* "*snort* AHHHHHHHHH!!" Jim's friend yelled to the high heavens, his waist raised high in the air. Pain constricted his face from good looking to ugly. Tears rolled down his face. The ladies snickered joyfully. They finally found a way to make him feel pain. Is this the end? Of course not. "Me, me, me. I want to go next!" "What?" Jim's friend said.

I rolled my eyes, causing him to laugh. "Don't call me red or I'll call you Sandy," I glared at him. He ran his tongue over his damask lips and shrugged. "We all have our weird names, my Mom did call me snickl…" he pinned his lips. I burst into laughter as I already knew the full word. "Ah, fuck!" "Snicklefritz? Really?" "Shut up," "It is my turn to laugh," I slid down the door and laughed my ass out while he muttered. He started walking away. "Hey, Snicklefritz snookums! Where are you off to?"

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine." "Please stop," Ashlyn laughed, covering her face with her hands. "Your jokes are getting worse." "My jokes are berry good, thank you very much." He grinned, clearly proud of himself. "Get it? Berry?" "I'm filing for divorce." "No, you're not. You love my dad jokes." "I tolerate them at best." Richard leaned forward, still holding the strawberry. "What do you call a fake noodle?" "Don't—" "An impasta!" Despite herself, Ashlyn burst out laughing. "That's it. I'm leaving."

the man snickered. He's not svaring me.

I jumped, startled when Xander suddenly rang out a little too loud, “Hey guys, why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?.... In case they get a hole-in-one!” Xander laughed, and Marcus rolled his eyes. I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose, knowing he's only getting started. “How does the Moon cut his hair?... Eclipse it!” Xander laughed even harder and slapped his knee. “Why don't skeletons fight each other?... Because they don't have the guts?” Xander curled forward, laughing way too hard at that one. “Thaddeus, if you don't kick his ass out of the car, I will!” Marcus growled, glaring at the back of Xander's head.

“Because it makes you laugh?” He clicked his tongue, a smile on his face. “You finally get it.” I rolled my eyes. “But ONLY you does it make laugh. Real jokes are so funny everyone around would burst into laughter, not them crying while you’re having a blast.” “A joke is a joke.” “…Your sense of humor is rotten,” I ended up muttering, hissing as his rough fingers tugged at the bandage wrapped around my ribs. The cloth peeled away sticky and damp, and the stench of dried blood hit my nose. I fought the urge to gag.

someone yelled. "I won’t shut up until someone answers!" Lucas shouted back, clearly enjoying the attention. "We don’t know and we don’t care, so shut the hell up, Lucas!" another voice barked. "Wrong! It’s called Lemon-aid! Get it? Like the drink?" The groan this time was even louder. "Dad jokes are never, ever funny," Elodie muttered, shaking her head.

unusual, maybe even crazy. But I didn't care. Besides, my relationship with Hawk was unusual to say the least. But still, I wouldn't want it any other way. "But wait," I suddenly said, putting an end to our little celebration. "How does my crying face look? Oh my god, don't tell me I have one of those ugly kind of crying faces?" I finished with a dramatic gasp, leaving Hawk to chuckle. "Well," he drawled. "It's actually not bad. Although, I think you got some snot hanging near your mouth. "Snot?" I echoed, not quite masking the horror in my voice. I instantly reached for it, wiping furiously at the top of my mouth; only stopping when I saw Hawk looking like he was trying to hold back a

He kept his hands up but then chuckled. "Man, I really need to learn how to joke around you. You're such a sensitive angel." "Sensitive? Sensitive!" I exploded. "Who smiles when they're fed snake meat?" "It's a sweet meat in some cultures, you know." He was right, but I still wasn't sensitive. Those tears were justified. It was ridiculous. "Well, not in my culture," I replied tightly.

Not even a little bit? I moved back away from him and when I said nothing,he came around to stand beside me again,he held my hand and we continued walking. “I’ve been browsing through a number of jokes this couple of days.I think I’ve become a very funny man.” I suppressed my lips in a tight line.”You don’t say.” “How do you open a banana?”He asked. “You peel it open.”I shrugged. “No.With a mon-key.” I grimaced and when he saw I didn’t get the joke,he rattled out.