A MOMENT FOR EVERYTHING I HID FROM YOU

LOLA

The whole time Connor bantered with Eddy, I kept my eyes fixed on Eddy and my mind rapidly processed his expression, weighing how much peace I get to enjoy going forward.

When Connor called him out on what happened, I saw the color disappear from Eddy's face and I knew exactly the only thing that could mean — I was in trouble.

I couldn't sit back and watch Greg lash out on Eddy. I knew he wouldn't want me to for the life of him. 

Moreover, I was visibly shaking, and that could send the wrong message to my father in-law. The last thing I wanted was to be dragged into this conversation at the moment, with Eddy sitting right there.

"Excuse me, please," I muttered. 

Without waiting for a response, I stood up, but I was too tense. My body jammed against the edge of the table, pushing my glass over. 

My eyes locked in the moment as I watched the water trail slowly, like it already mastered its path on the smooth of the table top, towards Eddy.

I wasn't sure how Mrs. Adama instincts worked, even I was too stunned to blink. Before I knew it, she was across the table with a napkin.

I watched her dab the wetness off Eddy's shirt and my heart shattered in a thousand pieces. 

Without any word, I turned and started to run up the stairs, the sharpness of the pairs of eyes that pierced through my back nudging the tears I was trying so hard to keep from falling.

----

I don't know how long I slept for, or what happened after I left the dinner table, but my eyes felt unbelievably heavy, like there were rocks fixed in the sockets instead of my actual eyeballs. I bet they were as puffy as hell, like I had cried through my sleep.

In a split second, that became the least of my worries. 

My stomach rumbled from constant fatigue and excessive intake of junks instead of real food.

My head felt light and my body weak to my bones.

Still lying on my side, unable to move a limb, I stared into the wall in front of me, tugging hard at the restlessness that had overtaken my entire being.

I felt like I was already sinking, and would be fine from the face of reality in no time.

I needed to feel whole again. I needed to think of myself as an entity worthy of living as a human.

My fingers twitched, and my p*ssy fluttered for attention — a kind I wouldn't be able to offer myself wholesomely.

With a terrible blurred up vision, I pulled myself up from the bed, and dragged myself across the room.

I yanked at the door several times before realizing it was actually bolted from the inside.

Sighing, I considered what might have actually happened for a second, but it was just for a second before my entire being returned right to the need burning ceaselessly underneath me.

Determined to feel whole again, I trudged up to Freddy's room, every next step heavier than the former and the emptiness of the hallways looping threateningly around me.

By the time I was in front of his door, my heart was beating heavily.

With shaky fingers, and legs almost as shaky like they were going to screw off to the floor the next minute, I landed a soft knock on Freddy's door, the pressure causing it to slightly swing open.

There was no answer still, so I let myself in.

He was sitting on the bed with his back to me and his hair is a disgustingly hot mess.

I swallowed, clasping my thighs together more while trying my best to ignore the crazy feeling of shameless desire sprouting fast in my stomach.

"What do you want?" he asked in a low voice laced with silent contempt and a growing impatience, not even bothering to look at my face.

A heavy feeling sat put in my chest, pressing down on my thoughts of attempting a reply.

"If you still feel the same as the last time, I'm not sorry, but I need to be alone," Freddy's voice came again.

I felt the level of seriousness in every single word he had spoken.

I would have easily turned back, bearing my shamelessness silently, so nobody could imagine how broken I was feeling inside, but I was feeling too much at the moment, so I made a decision.

"My father asked me to," I blurted out, the heaviness in my chest slightly dissolving, an extra urge to see to the end of whatever it was between me and Freddy.

He turned, his expression holding a thousand and one unspoken questions.

"He said it was my only chance to give them a good life." 

The words became heavier as I spoke more.

Slowly, Freddy stood up and began to walk his way to where I was standing, stiff, broken, feet rooted deeply into the floor.

I wasn't sure what came over me, if I moved first or he did or perhaps if we had actually moved at the same time.

In the next second, I was sucking longingly on his tongue, his hands wrapped around my head, but just as suddenly and unexpectedly as it had happened, he yanked at my hair, pulling my face away from his and wiping down hard.

"Keep going," he snapped, his eyes reddening with a feeling I bet was contempt.

"That is all there is to it," my voice cracked.

I swallowed, catching my breath quickly before they developed into sobs.

Freddy's gaze hung on me like he was trying to force the words out my throat.

"In summary—," he rubbed hard on his eyes, flexing his shoulders in a way, "What you are trying to say is, you left me without a single damn word because your parents asked you to? Because you didn't trust me to take care of your parents?"

His voice was loud, hard against the silence of the city night that stretched away from the opened window and mercilessly brutal against my thoughts.

"My parents never supported my relationship with you," I managed.

With a speed that snapped my breath away, he yanked me to himself and sucked down hard on my mouth, his tongue fluttering against mine and his lips fondling mine hard, my p*ssy throbbed even harder.

I wrapped my arms around him and melted helplessly into the moment, but then, he pushed me back with a pressure that almost had me crashing down.

His gaze was hard, his chest pumping in and out with an abnormal intensity. 

"Freddy...," I started, but somehow, the rest of the words would not flow.