Best Fat Jokes Novels & Stories

Tess betrayed by her boyfriend left the city without telling a soul, with only one thing on her mind, “revenge”.

What happens when a wedding planner has to work alongside a temperamental and annoying bride's brother to plan the wedding of the year? Chaos, pure chaos. The last thing Violet needed was a man to touch her slightly not so flat stomach (or perhaps it was a little more than slightly not to flat) and press her against a wall. She wasn't a model, and she knew it. So naturally, she just sucks her stomach in. Violet prided herself on creating the best weddings society has ever seen, the last thing she needed was to go head to head with the bride's brother, when planning Melbourne's biggest wedding of the year. Alex was everything Violet could dream about, but not touch. Handsome, built straight out of a magazine with the six pack. Was his interest in Violet genuine, or just another charm for the bedrest?

My competitive eater classmate, Selina Reeves, bound me to a fat transfer system. No matter how much food she ate, I was the one who gained weight. Later, she was named one of the top 100 food bloggers while I ballooned to 200 pounds and lost my job. My boyfriend did not seem to mind. He even proposed with unwavering confidence. A month later, Selina entered a competitive eating contest and devoured 20 pounds of ribs in one sitting. The excessive fat intake triggered acute hypertension, and I died on the spot. My husband inherited my substantial fortune, then turned around and married Selina without a second thought. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself three months in the past. Selina's food streaming career was just starting to gain traction, and I still weighed 90 pounds. This time, I snatched the ten-inch cake right out of her hands and ate every last bite. She had no idea I had bound myself to a food transfer system. No matter how much I ate, it would transfer to her stomach tenfold.

“You’re too fat to be my Luna.” Those seven words from my fated mate destroyed me. Alpha Derek rejected me in front of the entire pack, chose my skinny stepsister instead, and made my life a living hell. They starved me, beat me, and laughed as I suffered. But I survived. I escaped. I transformed. And I became everything they said I could never be. Now I’m back—stronger, fiercer, and mated to the most powerful Lycan King in existence. Derek’s on his knees, begging for a second chance. Too bad I’m done being the weak, broken girl he threw away. This time, I’m the one doing the rejecting.

At my own wedding, the groom switched—Malcolm Lowell bailed, and the best man stepped in. Lumi, the Irving's real daughter, latched onto Malcolm's arm and smirked from the crowd. "I was just feeling a little low," she said. "Didn't think Malcolm would go this far for me." Malcolm raised a brow. "I just wanted to make her happy. You took her spot for years. Time to pay it back. This is for your own good." That's when it hit me—this whole wedding was a setup, a twisted show just to entertain Lumi. All because I was the adopted one. I'd lived in her place for over two decades. I didn't cry. Didn't freak out. I just took the new groom's hand, faced the priest, and said, "Keep going."

There's nothing more shattering than hearing that you're signed off as a collateral to marry in order to clear off your uncle's stupid debts. "So this is it" I pull the hoodie over my head and grab my duffel bag that is already stuffed with all my important stuff that I need for survival. Carefully I jump down my window into the bushes below skillfully. I've done this a lot of times that I've mastered the art of jumping down my window. Today is different though, I'm not coming back here, never! I cannot accept marrying some rich ass junkie. I dust the leaves off my clothe and with feathery steps, I make out of the driveway. A bright headlight of a car points at me making me freeze in my tracks, another car stops and the door of the car opens. There's always only one option, Run!

Matthew Guerrero is the youngest son of a Mafia boss. He is a hot-headed man who always lets his fists act before his brain. But on the day he almost died at the hands of a treacherous client of his family, a man saved him—and that man was none other than Kaizer, someone who drifts from job to job. Their paths cross again when Kaizer becomes a bodyguard for the Guerrero family. Even though Kaizer once saved Matthew’s life, the two of them still constantly clash, both inside and outside the Guerrero mansion. Yet as time goes by, they slowly come to understand each other, and no one can separate these two men—through hardship and joy, they are always together. They get kidnapped together, shot together, end up in the hospital together, and even suffer food poisoning together from the street food they ate. After everything painful they have gone through, they are always side by side. Until little by little, what they feel for each other begins to change. Matthew thinks at first that it is just because Kaizer is his friend, but he realizes that what he feels for the man who is always with him is something far deeper. It is not easy for them to confess their feelings to each other before finally becoming a couple and doing the things only couples do. But behind those happy moments, Kaizer is hiding a secret—one that will shatter Matthew’s heart and world. A secret he has kept hidden for so long, one that will eventually explode and damage their love: a love born from trust and true affection… and lies.

THEY SAID NO WAY..................... Ashton Cooper and Selena McKenzie hated each other ever since the first day they've met. Selena knew his type of guys only too well, the player type who would woo any kinda girl as long as she was willing. Not that she was a prude but there was a limit to being loose, right? She would teach him a lesson about his "loving and leaving" them attitude, she vowed. The first day Ashton met Selena, the latter was on her high and mighty mode looking down on him. Usually girls fell at his beck and call without any effort on his behalf. Modesty was not his forte but what the hell, you live only once, right? He would teach her a lesson about her "prime and proper" attitude, he vowed. What they hadn't expect was the sparks flying between them...Hell, what now? ..................AND ENDED UP WITH OKAY

Selena learned early how to make herself smaller. As a plus-size omega, she grew up under laughter that followed her through hallways and silence that taught her she was never meant to be chosen. She was expected to endure, not dream. To accept whatever scraps of kindness came her way. So when Alpha Christopher claimed her, she believed it meant something. That she had finally escaped being invisible. That love had seen past her body, past her place, and decided she was worth keeping. She’s wrong. On the night before she becomes Luna, her mate destroys everything she believed in. His betrayal is cruel. His rejection is worse. And when she runs, she isn’t looking for love. She’s just trying to breathe. She finds one night of quiet ruin with a stranger named D. A man who looks at her like she is not too much. A man who protects her without asking and takes her without shame. By morning, she leaves, certain it was only a mistake. Back at the packhouse, the bullying returns. The control tightens. And the Alpha King is coming. Her ex’s uncle. A man feared for his cruelty and power. What Selena doesn’t know is that the man she plans to use to survive is the same man who already claimed her body in the dark. And when he realizes who she is, he won’t see a weak omega or a girl taught to feel small. He will see something that belongs to him. And he will not let her go.

Just when everything was going as planned Joanne was feeling the stress of her wedding and scheduled a doctor's appointment. A couple days later she gets a call that stops her plans in their tracks. "Ms. Hart, you're pregnant." Will all her best days ever come crashing to an end?