Best Tagalog Jokes

Everyone wants to be me. Who wouldn't? I've got the looks, sexy body, money and Andrew Maru Ottave, my husband. Pero kung malalaman lang siguro nila kung sino at ano talaga ang nangyayari sa buhay ko, hindi ko alam kung gugustuhin pa nilang maging ako. Simula pagkabata ay alam ko na ang aking magiging kapalaran. Wala akong karapatan na mamili kung sino ang gusto kong makasama habambuhay. Dahil sa huli ang mga magulang ko pa rin ang magdedesisyon kung sino ang aking mapapangasawa. It's not a new thing with the elite. My parents are also a product of an arranged marriage. They marry for business and had a child for business. And just like my mom, I will also be a Business Wife.

May pag-asa pa ba na maging makatotohanan ang pag-ibig kung isa na lamang ang kumakapit sa relasyon? Paano kung ang pag-ibig ay ipinilit lamang? You can’t force someone to love you back. Love should not be taken for granted. A tragedy should be utilized as a steppingstone to become stronger— a source of strength. No matter what kind of challenges you may face, how painful your experience…you should stand firmly. The storm shall pass, too Lorie loves Lander so much, to the point that she puts Lander first in everything. Lander is her heaven even though she is his hell. Pinangako niya sa sarili niya na mamahalin niya si Lander hanggang sa huling hininga niya. But, will someone like Lander who doesn’t believe in love be able to open his heart and let Lorie in and accept her wholeheartedly? Lander hates Lorie down to his core. He thinks it's all Lorie's fault why all his dreams and plans were ruined. Marrying Lorie is just a big delusion. That's why Lander swears to himself thathe would feel nothing for Lorie but hatred and he would do anything to get Lorie out of his life.

When he looked in through the window, he was astounded to see her topless and braless. She was standing with her back to him, eliciting wild desires in him. He took his handkerchief from his pocket and crept into her room. He blindfolded her with his hankie before dragging her towards the bed. Her heartbeat accelerated. She could feel that he was her man. She asked, "is it you, baby?" He pushed her onto the bed and gazed at her perfect slender body with profound desires in his eyes. He hovered her and tied her wrists with his tie to the headboard. *** She could never stop her heart from beating for him since the day she saw him despite knowing that he would never retaliate to her feelings as for him she was only his best friend's sister. She was so innocent and pure like holy water, and he was messed up and a monster whom anybody definitely wouldn't like to come across. She had never dated anyone in her entire life because, for her, the love of her life was everything. On the other hand, he never believed in all this. For him, "love" didn't exist; it was all about physical needs. His mere presence was enough to relieve her pain; he was like oxygen to her, while on the other hand, he didn't even acknowledge her presence. Her love was so pure and selfless that it could make anyone fall for it because it's not easy to love someone who is forbidden. But will he ever witness her love? Will he ever love her as purely as she loves him? Will her one-sided love ever be fulfilled? If you want to know, then follow the journey of a tempting biker and his secret admirer.

“Zhia, listen carefully to them...” Ipinakita nila sa akin through presentation ang portfolio ni Sean at halos... Wow. Napanganga ako at yung tipong natulog pa ba ang lalaking to sa loob ng 17 years at 17 years lang! Oh my Ghad! “All of the businesses are legally operated.” Napalingon ako kay Sean... “Sorry.” yun na lang nasambit ko dahil alam ko malulugi siya dahil sa trilliones na nawala. “ I don't accept Sorry Zhia. It's just a playing safe words. I hate that single word. So, since sinabi ko na din yan. Don't ever mention it again. I think pumirma ka na.” Napatingin ako sa papel. Oh my na pinanlakihan ko ng aking mga mata. Sabay yakap sa folder at tingin na nakangiti kay Sean. “Hindi pa. Pakuha ka nang bagong kontrata dali.” Nang bigla niyang hawakan yung folder at tigasan kong niyakap. “Ano ba Sean! Ikaw tong di nakikinig eh! Di pa nga!” Pero mapilit talaga.hangang sa nakuha na niya. Tinignan nga niya...at hinarap ako na nakangiti... “You're already mine Zhia, kahit wala ang kontrata na ito.” sabi niya na di maalis sa labi niya ang ngiti.

On her wedding day, Elena's groom runs away, leaving her feeling embarrassed and humiliated in front of their guests and family. Ray, the only friend of the groom named Oskar, comes to her aid and offers to marry her instead. "I love you. That's why I want to marry you, not Oskar. I'm not just a replacement for today, but forever," Ray declares his love for Elena. Elena accepts Ray's proposal to maintain her reputation and move on from the painful experience. However, Oskar returns with regret and confesses his love for Elena, even though he is married to Sarah for business reasons. Oskar asks Elena to be his mistress, and they begin an affair despite their respective marriages. But eventually, Elena realizes that what she's doing is wrong, and she wants to end the relationship. Before Elena can break things off with Oskar, Ray finds out about their affair and is devastated. Sarah also learns about the affair and decides to seek revenge. "Why did you accept me if you still love him? You've hurt me, Elena. You don't really love me!" Ray expresses his disappointment and hurt over Elena's betrayal.

Cedrick Marlan Wu, a physician also known as Doctor Alucard. He is also behind the multi-billionaire Wu Pharmaceutical Company & Wu Medical institution (WMI). During his wedding day, it turns the time as a nightmare to him. His bride showered to her own blood. It was known Wu Wedding Massacre. Where hundreds of people died on that tragic accident. After the accident, he obtains the phobia so called Philophobia. (Fear to love) He perform surgery during only full moon, reason why they called him Doctor Alucard.

Quinlee Velez has a wealthy but miserable life, despite of that she has a boy bestfriend who is one call away in times of distress and trouble. She always has things planned out to pursue and reach her dreams until one day she meets a guy named Zik, with a contract that ties the knot and who shatters her plans. Felt she was doomed to a life of extreme unhappiness. Marriage is normally one’s happily ever after in the movies but for them it’s a complete opposite of what other’s expect. Are they going to survive? Or ends in break-up and walk in separate ways? All right, let’s see!

The worst thing for Elena Ryder was crushing on Harry since 5th grade but he never had feelings for her except for his best friend, Shawn. Elena, Harry, and Shawn have been friends since elementary. Elena closed feelings for Harry and accepted Shawn to be her boyfriend after his confession but now Harry is back from England re-opening that lost feelings Elena hid in her closet.

Every girl had a time when they crushed on that one handsome friend of their father and it was quite the same for Rochelle. She fantasized about being taken by that hunk of a man so after what she considered a sign by the universe, she decided to throw caution to the wind and go for him. Operation Seduce Her Father’s Friend began but as she progresses, she soon discovers that she had bitten way more than she can chew. Yes, she wanted him but she didn’t realize that he came not as one but as a triplet and each of them desired her just as equally or even more fiercely than she did them. Faced with such an overwhelming passion, will she be able to handle it or will she run for the hills? What happens when she realizes that it’s to late to run as these men, once they claim what is theirs, will never let go. And she is theirs, whether she accepts it or not.

Three months after my baby was born, I found out my husband, Joe, was cheating. The other woman? Hailey. Pregnant and smug. Joe actually got on his knees, begging for a divorce. I said yes. Until I could find a place, Joe's mom, Claudia, let me stay at the house. "Hailey," Claudia said, "you'll handle all the household responsibilities now." Hailey, all fake enthusiasm, chirped, "I'll take good care of this family!" Claudia replied, "Great. You'll start your day at five making breakfast. When Luca's hungry, you'll feed him and change his diapers. Once he's down for a nap, clean the house, grocery shop, and prep lunch. Laundry in the afternoon, tea service mid-day, then bathe Luca and cook dinner. After that, you'll put him to bed." Hailey's face? Priceless.