Contoh Teks Humor

“I trusted you!” Zachary yelled angrily his hands curled into fists at the revelation that he just got. "Is this is how you repay me?!” “I never told you to trust me." “Do you honestly think that I will let you get away with this?" Zach looked at the woman furiously. “Well, you’ll be disappointed." He took long steps towards her threateningly and held both hands, pushing her towards the wall hardly. “Do you think I'll let you get away from this?” Alex looked at him hardly, their faces close to each other, mouths almost touching. “Because I won’t.” Zach then pressed his mouth on hers in a hard and hungry kiss, giving in to the demands of his body that's been eating him for a while. Zachary Montgomery, 36, is a hard-working FBI agent, who works in counterterrorism, instead with the big law firm that his family had for generations. He is a man with goals and conviction. Alexandra Walters is a 27-year-old diner co-owner with her aunt and her wheelchair-bound younger sister. She turned her back on the thrilling and fast-paced life she once had. When Alexandra met Zachary over an incident that she believes has something to do with the case she abandoned, she forced her way in, despite his resistance and persistence in pushing her away and keeping her away from the case. Covering up their attraction towards each other, Zachary will do anything to keep her away for her safety while Alexandra made a vow to herself that she will get the information she needs to finally close the case that has been haunting her. Even if it means, seducing Zachary Montgomery to her bed.

Angela Woodson; perky, buoyant and an innocent seventeen year old, who lives to make others smile. She's the kind of girl who can only love. She overlooks the bad in people and always sees the good in them. She always helps others even if it be a bloody murderer. Mason King; the leader of the most powerful gang, Viri Sanguinum. He is said to be cold, ruthless and a blood thirsty killer. He never grants mercy. Never helps nobody. But as they say, no one is born with bad. Circumstances make them. What possessed him to do this? With a dreadful past that still haunts him, Mason was bound to become bad. *** What if certain circumstances lead them to collide? Opposites attract they say. Is it possible in this case?

"Vee bumangon ka muna! Ipapakilala ko sayo iyong bago mong bodyguard." Kahit inaantok pa ay bumangon ako at bagot na tinignan si Daddy. "What? Bodyguard na naman! Ayoko na nga ng ganyan eh! Nakakasawa na--" napahinto ako sa pagsasalita ng may lalaking pumasok sa kwarto ko. "Sino siya?" "Vee meet your new bodyguard, James Villianuevva." "Ito? New bodyguard ko? Seryoso ka dad?" "Yes, and I am sure magugustuhan mo siya. Magkakasundo kayo sa mga bagay-bagay, lalo na kung mag sho-shopping ka at pagdating sa mga makeup--" "Babae lang ang mahilig mag shopping at mag makeup dad." Saad ko at napatampal sa noo ko. "I'm gay." Muntik ng malaglag iyong panga ko sa sinabi niya.

She is a Lady, but she spews profanities like they were made for her. She is what you would call....A F*cking Lady. ....••••••.... Zylith Sanders was a mundane teenager until one-day she was sucked into a wash basin and somehow ridiculously ended up in a feudal world without her beloved games and movies. To make matters worse, she was sold off by slave traders to the horrid Noble house of Ronales as a petty maid. But that was not the end of her worries, Dear Zylith, the feminist had a long struggle ahead of her when she meets the mighty King of this feudal kingdom and becomes his pretend consort. With a king that likes to poke deadly humor at her, and a bamby girl who wanted nothing to do with the ancients. How will the poor teenage feminist cope with only her sarcastic mouth to rely on! Just dive in and read on to find out Zylith Sander's romantic plight.

Ever since she could remember, Maya Connors has always been the smart, shy girl that sat at the back of the classroom. She tackled every task with a boundless zest, except when it came to boys and relationships. Being eighteen and never once had a boyfriend, she was adamant that it would stay the same until she graduated. But sometimes, you have to expect the unexpected - such as falling for Ethan Morrison, a boy who was way too handsome and way too out of her league. Despite coming from very different social circles, a school trip to Europe was all it took as to her dismay, she found him incredibly charming. But when Maya ventures out of her shell and falls too deep, she realizes that it's too late to go back. With her heart laying on the line, she's about to face a whirlwind of emotions, drama, and secrets.

WARNING : contains Matured Content ********18+************ Lone was an omega who got banished by Alpha Alexandra for his weakness with no where left to go, he took refuge in the dark forest and stumbled into the dark side of the underworld with vampires,spirits,fairies ,witches ,magic spell's ,demons ,dry bones and dark elixir. He returns an all powerful demi god ,an alpha killing machine, he is a sworn enemy to the alpha's only ,what happens when he meets his next Alpha target and she's a she wolf and his mate, and daughter to His fathers killer Will he send his mate down to Hell's very depth ,or mark her to get her eternal love . For a wolf turned evil by the darkness of the underworld and dark elixir will love make any meaning to him . "You want me baby I know you do , I look in your eyes and I can tell you wanna kill me with pleasure .send me to heaven ,hell the underworld or wherever you want baby and I'll go as long as I'm with you ,I'll always be happy following your every command , you are my alpha and king ". "Shut up your mouth rosa and stop talking nonsense ,trying to seduce me to spare your life isn't going to work at all ,between you and me there's only one destined end

Grace Anderson is a striking young lady with a no-nonsense and inimical attitude. She barely smiles or laughs, the feeling of pure happiness has been rare to her. She has acquired so many scars and life has thought her a very valuable lesson about trust. Dean Ryan is a good looking young man with a sanguine personality. He always has a smile on his face and never fails to spread his cheerful spirit. On Grace's first day of college, the two meet in an unusual way when Dean almost runs her over with his car in front of an ice cream stand. Although the two are opposites, a friendship forms between them and as time passes by and they begin to learn a lot about each other, Grace finds herself indeed trusting him. Dean was in love with her. He loved everything about her. Every. Single. Flaw. He loved the way she always bit her lip. He loved the way his name rolled out of her mouth. He loved the way her hand fit in his like they were made for each other. He loved how much she loved ice cream. He loved how passionate she was about poetry. One could say he was obsessed. But love has to have a little bit of obsession to it, right? It wasn't all smiles and roses with both of them but the love they had for one another was reason enough to see past anything. But as every love story has a beginning, so it does an ending.

Lumaki si Cleopatra na nakatatak na sa isip niyang si Primo ang lalaking para sa kan'ya. Ang lalaking pakakasalan niya ngunit paano kung biglang magbago ang ikot ng mundo? Paano kung malaman niya ang itinatago nitong sikreto? Matutupad pa kaya ang nais niyang maging bride nito? Paano kung ang safest choice niya ay hindi naman ang totoong tinutibok ng puso niya? Sino nga ba ang pipiliin niya, ang lalaking ipinagkasundo sa kaniya o ang bestfriend nitong laging andiyan para sa kaniya?

She is Margarette Leora Bartolome, a girl who are suffering from severe narcolepsy. Naging pagala-gala sa masikot na daan simula nang mapalayas ng mga kamag-anak. Paano kung sa pagiging pakalat-kalat ay mapunta siya sa lugar kung saan nakasanayang tambayan mg limang lalaki? Will it drives to her unbelievable journey in life and love?

IT WAS late afternoon when Andy began to pick up the clothes she had hung up this morning, but she stopped what she was doing when she heard shouts and footsteps outside their backyard as if those people are in a hurry. So she peeked through the hole in their wall that is already brittle. But to her surprised, someone suddenly jumped out from the outside and entered their yard-- a man wearing a black hoody jacket. "W-who are you?!" Andy managed to ask, so the man turned slightly to her which caused her to see the man’s face. "Shit," that's all the man said and ran away... carrying her... "Hey, shit! My panties, give them back to me!" Andy shouted but he didn’t look at her again. Her panty which was hung outside was taken by a stranger. And now, the question running to Andy’s mind is… ‘Who’s that guy who stole my panty?’